rehab - HecklerSpray

Shocker of the Year: Liza Minnelli is Back in Rehab

March 19th, 2015 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Announcing that Liza Minnelli is in rehab again is like announcing that Kim Kardashian has posed nude for another magazine pictorial, or that Chris Brown done something douchey again. It’s like, yeah, and what? People anticipate that shit. But anyway, here it is: the beloved goddess that is Liza is once again in rehab.

Minnelli, 69, is back in rehab for a drug and alcohol problem. I’m not even sure how many times she’s been in and out of rehab, or what drugs she is on now, but Liza has always been super open about her tru luv always relationship with painkillers, so one can assume.

Amanda Bynes Pulled A Lohan

October 1st, 2014 By Megan Leitch

Oh man, after?the craziness that was 2013 Amanda Bynes, 2014 Amanda Bynes was looking golden.? She completed rehab, she was on medication to keep her sane, she was attending school,?and?her parents were helping steer her in the right direction. ?

But with the end of her conservatorship earlier this month has also come the end of Non-BSC Amanda.? Take note Spears family, this is what happens when you let?rich crazy?people make all their own decisions again.

Chris Brown Couldn’t Help Being So Angry It Seems

March 2nd, 2014 By Megan Leitch

It seems like just yesterday Chris Brown was punching guys in the face for daring to jump into a picture with him when he’s trying to mack it to some groupies.? But it was actually months ago, and that incident was the catalyst behind Brown going on lockdown in rehab to avoid getting thrown in the clinker.?? Hasn’t it been a much less jerk-y world lately?? Well, except for Justin Dickbag and Shia LaDouche.? Their time is coming.

Brown not only made it through his 90 day rehab for anger management, but he even stayed an extra 5 days.? And it seems he completed it with flying colors, plus walks away with a long list of doctor approved issues that Brown can use as excuses for his shitty behavior now.

The Disney Curse Claims Selena Gomez As Its Latest Victim

February 5th, 2014 By Rhiannon Davies

All those months of having to put up with Justin Bieber’s shit seem to have finally caught up with Selena Gomez. She bundled herself off to rehab at the start of January for exhaustion.?

Disney must run a boot camp to teach its stars how to evade the paparazzi when picking the perfect rehab spot – first Zac Efron and now Selena Gomez have managed to check themselves in and out without anyone realising they’d disappeared. Whilst Zac got help for his penchant for white powder, Selena’s stay was for something a little more PG. If you believe her reps, that is.

Bad News Guys, You Can’t Send Ke$ha Any More Human Remains

January 23rd, 2014 By Rhiannon Davies

Kesha 2

If you ?think you can hear sirens blaring in the distance, it’s because Ke$ha’s rehab stay has just been crashed by the fun police.?

What’s the world coming to, when a platinum selling musician can’t ask her legions of fans to send her their own teeth so she can keep busy with some arts and crafts while she whiles away the hours in rehab??Timberline Knolls Residential Treatment Centre, where the singer is staying while she battles an eating disorder, has stated that they can’t accept any ‘human remains’ because there’s a chance that the human teeth Kesha asked for might just be bio-hazardous.

Ke$ha’s Life Sure Does Sound Like It Sucks, Guys

January 9th, 2014 By Rhiannon Davies

You might have just seen the words ‘Ke$ha’ and ‘sucks’ in the same sentence and jumped to conclusions about where this post is going. For once, that’s not the case and quite frankly you need to get your head out of the gutter.

Poor Ke-Dollar Sign-Ha has had a rough time lately – going to rehab for an eating disorder doesn’t sound like a barrel of laughs, and now her mom has been lifting the lid on all the other messed up stuff that’s flown under the radar since her daughter hit the big time. Surprise surprise, all the problems seem to stem from her entourage.

Chris Brown To Spend 90 Days Meditating And Counting To 10

November 22nd, 2013 By Megan Leitch

Sometimes, it feels like Groundhog’s Day with dumbass celebrities and their antics.? Same shit, different day.? But on the plus side, thanks to assholes like Chris Brown, at least I know I will never be out of a job.

Once again, Brown has proven to be totally fucking stupid, and a judge has sentenced his ass to 90 days of rehab to deal with his anger issues.? What Brown really needs is 90 days of real thugs and gangsters making him their bitch in prison, but small victories should still be celebrated I guess.

Hot Messes Miley Cyrus And Lindsay Lohan Become Buddies

October 31st, 2013 By Megan Leitch

In an event that could have caused the spontaneous combustion of Manhattan due to an overload of sloppy tuna vag, Lindsay Lohan and Miley Cyrus ran into each other at a club Saturday night.?

As soon as Lindsay noticed the currently more relevant?former Disney starlet, she crawled over tables?like?that bitch from “The Ring” to get close to Miley.??Instead of blowing Lohan off, Cyrus decided to embrace the insane ginger and become besties.

Chris Brown Enters Fauxhab to Avoid Getting Poked in the Ass

October 31st, 2013 By Megan Leitch

In a total PR move surprising no one, Chris Brown has entered rehab.? Brown was arrested Saturday in Washington DC for punching a dude in the face for getting too close to his so not gay dick in a picture.? Since the R&B’s biggest douchebag is still on probation for beating Rihanna a few years ago, there is a good chance that this could be seen as a violation, and Brown could be sent to jail.

Now realistically, it seems unless you straight up murder someone, it doesn’t matter how many DUIs or assault charges you have, if you’re rich enough you don’t ever wind up in jail for longer than a hot minute, if at all. So the likelihood of Brown’s asshole being fair game to a bunch of sex starved criminals is low, but Chris is taking a few extra steps to help make sure that his exit only stays an exit only.

Red Alert: The Disney Curse Has Taken Down Zac Efron

September 24th, 2013 By Rhiannon Davies

If you’re a parent and you’re thinking that maybe you should take your little darling to try out for that new Disney show, ?then you need to stop. If the Disney Curse can take Zac Efron, it can take anybody.?

Before you know it, your precious bundle of joy will be up to their eyeballs in shots (both of the vodka and mug variety), leaked sexts, and much like our friend Zac, suspicious white powder. At this rate, the Magic Kingdom might need to install a detox centre next to Space Mountain.