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Queen

Is Adam Lambert The New Freddie Mercury? Probably Not, No

by Stuart Heritage

The American Idol final is long gone. Gone but not forgotten. Following the victory of Kris Whateverhisnamewas, the shock is still palpable.

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Top 11 Lego Music Videos (Stop Motion)

by David Schwartz

It’s sad to admit it – but we never really grew out of Lego.

Any excuse to go to Legoland and we are there. Although as only a few of us have kids, we usually have to kidnap them to get in. Of course, we are joking. None of us have kids.

Anyway, to satisfy our sad Lego urges thankfully there are people who have decided to create music videos purely from Lego. Of course, The White Stripes did it, but here are 11 others for your viewing pleasure…

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Flash Gordon Remake Gets Some Writers, Probably to Make it all Gritty and Urban

by Ian Dransfield

Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun… Flash! Pakow! Ahhh! It’s quite difficult to decide what made up word successfully describes the noise after ‘Flash!’ is cried on the Queen song, but hecklerspray has gone with ‘pakow!’ and forever it will remain that way. What is [...]

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Beyonce’s Dad Gets The Arseholes With Aretha Franklin

by Stuart Heritage

We hereby take back everything negative we’ve ever said about the Grammys.

Yes, the Grammys are dull, overlong and self-congratulatory, but if the Grammys didn’t exist, then Aretha Franklin’s demented tantrum over Beyonce calling Tina Turner ‘the queen’ instead of her wouldn’t exist either. And that’s just too priceless to live without.

Especially now that Beyonce’s dad has gotten in on the act, too – Matthew Knowles has called Aretha Franklin “childish and unprofessional” for her outburst. We’re expecting Aretha’s “That’s childish, unprofessional and super-super morbidly obese to you,” retort to come any second now.

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Aretha Franklin Gets The Right Hump With Beyonce’s Mouth

by Stuart Heritage

If you saw the Grammys last weekend, you’ll have witnessed Beyonce duetting with a panting, apple-faced pensioner wrapped in a scrap of tinfoil who Beyonce claimed was Tina Turner.

And that’s got Aretha Franklin thoroughly narked. You see, Beyonce introduced Tina Turner at the Grammys by calling her “the queen.” And Aretha Franklin is under the impression that she’s actually the queen.

The queen of what, we don’t know. Although judging by her performance at the Grammys, our first guess would be that Aretha Franklin is the queen of competition-standard sausage-gobbling.

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The Queen Is Older Than Anyone Else Ever

by Paul Sorrenti

It’s official: our gracious, noble Queen Liz junior, has rewritten the record books again by becoming the longest living British monarch in history.

According to Buckingham Palace officials, who have taken into account the exact time Queen Victoria – Liz’s great-great grandmother and now ex-record holder – was born, our own current Queen became the oldest ‘serving’ monarch at 5pm this afternoon.

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