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Articles tagged with: Pizza

Oh Joey Chestnut, Won’t You Competitive-Eat Our Heart?
By Stuart Heritage on Monday, October 13, 2008 at 7:00pm | One Comment
Oh Joey Chestnut, Won’t You Competitive-Eat Our Heart? We're getting really tired of people who say that their skill is mechanics or songwriting or saving lives with the aid of medical science.
Those skills are naught compared to the mighty skill held by Mr Joey Chestnut, a man who we wish to emulate in every single way possible. Why? Because Joey Chestnut - our favourite competitive eater - has just eaten 45 slices of pizza in 10 minutes during an event in New York, smashing the previous world record.
By doing so, Joey Chestnut instantly won a place in our heart. How big? Easily as big as the impacted chuck of bone-dense cholesterol that we presume is lodged in his ascending aorta and will zap him off to an early grave before too long. Hooray for Joey Chestnut!
Tom Cruise Can’t Keep Pizzas Warm With Magic
By Stuart Heritage on Thursday, January 17, 2008 at 7:00pm | 8 Comments
Tom Cruise Can’t Keep Pizzas Warm With Magic

To watch the skin-crawling Tom Cruise: Scientologist video you'd think that there was literally nothing that Tom Cruise couldn't do, apart from make sense and laugh normally.

However, Katie Holmes has bravely pushed her head above the parapet and spoken out about something that Tom Cruise isn't able to do.

Tom Cruise, you see, can't keep pizzas warm with magic.

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