Pink's last album might have been called I'm Not Dead, but her marriage certainly is - dead as a flipping doornail.

It's just been reported that Pink and her husband Carey Hart are divorcing after two years of happy, split rumour-filled, years. Although Pink and Carey Hart have said that they're still great friends despite the break-up, it's no surprise that their marriage didn't last on reflection.

After all, it must be hard to be married to a woman who looks like she could quite easily beat you in an arm-wrestling match.

Brad Pitt is continuing his quest to rebuild New Orleans in his own image - a bit like God did with mankind, only pinker and more bricky.

As part of his $12 million Make It Right campaign to build a series of cheap, sustainable homes to rehouse those affected by Hurricane Katrina, Brad Pitt has been to New Orleans to unveil a whole host of brand new homes that will... wait, that's not what Brad Pitt unveiled at all. In actuality, Brad Pitt unveiled a load of bright pinks blocks to obliquely remind people about the floods. But the houses are coming, honest, and Brad Pitt has pledged $5 million of his own money to build 150 houses by next summer.

Hang on, that's a good thing. This isn't what hecklerspray does. Damn you for not doing more stuff we can mock you for, Brad Pitt. Damn you to hell.