Pictures - HecklerSpray

Katy Perry Needs to Stop Showing Off Her Boobs

October 4th, 2012 By Chris Starr

Katheryn Elizabeth Hudson aka Katy Perry used to be such a lovely girl. She was well-mannered, good-thinking and Christian. She respected her elders, was chaste and pure, and did well to others. Then the pop industry got to her, and she became a massive outlandish tease with massive outlandish…well, let’s not talk about that.

Now I’m no prude, but this is too much. Put the boobs away. There’s so much to this woman that isn’t simply her breasts. But if you looked at her public appearances you’d think that there wasn’t.

Who Knew Kate Middleton Had Such an Incredible Ass?

October 3rd, 2012 By Chris Starr

Take me away and lock me up in the Tower of London, because I bring what is potentially treasonous news. Kate Middleton’s hoo-hah has been photographed in the wild – showing that the paparazzi problems between the Royal family and the rest of us will never end.

You all know the story by now: Wills and Kate were holidaying in France, and a photographer who was seemingly stationed a good couple of miles away and was unable to keep a steady enough hand to get anything like clear images took pictures of her boobs.

Kate Middleton Topless Photos Published by Horny French Perverts

September 14th, 2012 By Chris Starr

What is the media’s obsession with seeing members of the royal family in their birthday suits? It turns out that it’s not only Prince Harry that enjoys being carefree and clothesless in the world. Today, French magazine Closer has published photos of Kate Middleton topless.

“So what?” you’re thinking. Well, this is the wife of the third in line to the British throne, who is currently in the middle of a media tour of the far East. She’s also one of the most recognised faces in the world, and she’s linked to a family which is known for its reserve and gentility (but is always featured prominently in media outlets when they don’t behave quite so well – see Wales, Harry for a bunch of perfect examples).

5 Reasons Why Prince Harry is a Complete Embarrassment

August 23rd, 2012 By Chris Starr

Well, he was grown up for five days. I guess that’s all you can ask for really. He is, after all, ginger, spoilt, and unlikely to ever see himself as King. A guy’s got to do what a guy’s got to do, and in that case it means letting off steam and making the British Royal Family seem like it’s a college kid at a kegger.

We are of course talking about Prince Henry Charles Albert David of Wales, known to Harry by some and a monumental fuckup to the 70 million people of Britain. You see, we were doing so well this year. We had the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee. We held the Olympics. The Paralympics was coming up round the corner. People around the world liked us and respected us! But then ginger Harry had to come and fuck it up, as he always does. Let’s count the ways he’s screwed over the country by being an absolute lad.

Kim Kardashian Tweets Picture Of Herself As Naked As Nature Intended

February 28th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

Kim Kardashian is a very private girl, remember? She doesn’t like to share too much of her private life unless it’s the day of her wedding or the rest of her life through her twitter account and reality TV programme.

Other than that, she’s a very secretive, private girl.

And now, she’s sending pictures of herself out online in a state of undress, without any makeup on and invariably fishing for compliments like those girls who pose in their bra, tweet it, and sigh “I’m so fat” or “I’m feeling pretty ugly today guys”, only to be flooded with fished-for compliments from sad men and kindly, envious women. Anyway, shall we get on with looking at the picture?

Assassin’s Creed 3 Announced, One Christmas Present Sorted

February 17th, 2012 By Robin Darke

Wasn?t it fantastic leaping from roof to roof in Constantinople? Diving from high towers into the river, only to miss and fall into a broken heap, slowly soiling yourself until you died alone and weeping?

It was the stuff of movies, if those movies had troubling control mechanisms and some rather heavy looking armour. Well that's what Assassin?s Creed: Revelations was all about. What it also did, was to bring the story of Altair and Ezio Auditore to a vague kind of conclusion ready for whatever Ubisoft gave us in the next installment.

Well good news everyone who’s still interested! Assassin?s Creed 3 has officially been given a release date. Of October 30th 2012. A full 10 months away. But apart from the title, and the date, what else do we know?

Do You Want To See Some Distressing Pictures Of Macaulay Culkin?

February 10th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

You may remember him from Home Alone and Uncle Buck, but there’s much more to?Macaulay Culkin than those two films. Actually, now you mention it, there isn’t. That’s all he’s ever done. Ever.?

Okay, that’s not really true either.

The other thing Culkin is famed for is the fact he had the temerity to grow older and develop into an increasingly less-cute thing on its hind legs. He basically went from adorable and annoying, to forgettable and hideous. HOWEVER! He’s back in the news and people are pointing at his cheek bones and gurgling at how appallingly thin he is… and yes, we’ve got the pictures.

Lindsay Lohan Has Clawed Her Way Out Of Pet Semetary

February 10th, 2012 By Lady Robotnik

Lindsay Lohan stepped out on the red carpet this week looking as young, sexy and stylish as ever. Wait, we mean the exact opposite of that.

The o/b/v/i/o/u/s/c/r/a/c/k/a/d/d/i/c/t starlet was papped at the amfAR New York Gala yesterday sporting tobacco-stained hair, meth teeth and accessorised her hot new look with a Grinch-skin coat and a vacant stare.

Want a look? You brave crusader, you. Just click the jump.

Reports Of Teenagers Spontaneously Combusting Over Justin Bieber’s Support Of The Wanted

February 9th, 2012 By Michael Park

Worrying reports are beginning to reach the hecklerspray news desk of spontaneous combustion among children.?

Reports so far are sketchy but it is thought that the exact demographic affected is girls & boys between the ages of 11 & 17. Parents are being advised to keep their children away from the internet for the foreseeable future to limit the risk of catastrophic explosion.

Experts have warning that if the spread of these fiery paroxysms isn’t stemmed immediately, it could lead to a cataclysmic chain reaction that could- if predictions are accurate- wipe out all human life on the planet, leaving Earth in the paws of Dormice.

Lindsay Lohan: Still Hanging Around The Morgue

January 16th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

Lindsay Lohan isn’t as much fun as she used to be. Remember when she was constantly full of drink and drugs, having sex with everyone, stealing jewels and getting accused of assault and battery? Those were good days.

Sadly, she seems to have straightened herself out… BUT WAIT!

See, LiLo has been doing her community service, hauling her speckled self around a morgue! Ostensibly, Judge Stephanie Sautner wants her to fix herself by warping her mind with dead bodies. Get the feeling that we’ll be seeing good ol’ Insane Lohan again in the future?