Articles tagged with: Pictures
Ricky Martin Shows Off His Twins. His Actual Twins
As the only man in history to ever father a child, Ricky Martin is in demand at the moment to explain what it's like. Although they were born in the summer, Ricky Martin has decided to show off his baby twins Valentino and Matteo for the first time in People, while describing exactly how spiritual he feels when they smile or cry or poo or whatever. Ricky Martin is raising the twins alone as a single father, so they obviously won't be breastfed. Not because Ricky is a man and therefore can't lactate, but because his nipples are probably already manky and chewed up and stuff.
As the only man in history to ever father a child, Ricky Martin is in demand at the moment to explain what it's like. Although they were born in the summer, Ricky Martin has decided to show off his baby twins Valentino and Matteo for the first time in People, while describing exactly how spiritual he feels when they smile or cry or poo or whatever. Ricky Martin is raising the twins alone as a single father, so they obviously won't be breastfed. Not because Ricky is a man and therefore can't lactate, but because his nipples are probably already manky and chewed up and stuff.
Naked Adrienne Bailon, Disney Cheetah Girl, All Over Everywhere
It's been forever since a young Disney star got naked on the internet, so Adrienne Bailon deserves a flipping medal or something. Don't know who Adrienne Bailon is? Don't worry - neither do we! Just know that there are naked Adrienne Bailon photos all over the internet, and there's supposedly a sex tape on the way too. Best of all, Adrienne Bailon is 25 years old, so you can look at her naked photos without being terrified that the police will find the images on your hard drive and get all Gary Glitter on you. We're sure this is hugely embarrassing time for Adrienne Bailon, and the poor girl's probably worried that these naked photos will spell the end of her career - but there's no reason for that to happen. Just look at Kim Kardashian - a similar thing happened to her and she managed to last three full weeks on Dancing With The Stars. That's the big time, Adrienne!
It's been forever since a young Disney star got naked on the internet, so Adrienne Bailon deserves a flipping medal or something. Don't know who Adrienne Bailon is? Don't worry - neither do we! Just know that there are naked Adrienne Bailon photos all over the internet, and there's supposedly a sex tape on the way too. Best of all, Adrienne Bailon is 25 years old, so you can look at her naked photos without being terrified that the police will find the images on your hard drive and get all Gary Glitter on you. We're sure this is hugely embarrassing time for Adrienne Bailon, and the poor girl's probably worried that these naked photos will spell the end of her career - but there's no reason for that to happen. Just look at Kim Kardashian - a similar thing happened to her and she managed to last three full weeks on Dancing With The Stars. That's the big time, Adrienne!
Kate Winslet’s Naked Body Totally Belongs To Kate Winslet, OK?
History dictates that, whenever Kate Winslet appears in public, she must always have her bum - or at least one of her norks - out. And since Kate Winslet has an interview in the new issue of Vanity Fair, it stands to reason that she should get as absolutely naked as flipping possible in every single accompanying picture. But here's the crazy thing - Kate Winslet's naked body actually looks fairly decent in the photos. And this is chubby old Kate Winslet we're talking about here - lumpy bumpy old chubby old Kate Winslet. So if her naked pictures looked good, it's only logical to assume that it was because they'd been mangled beyond all recognition with an airbrush. Just don't mention that around Kate Winslet, because there's a strong chance she'll punch your face off if she hears you.
History dictates that, whenever Kate Winslet appears in public, she must always have her bum - or at least one of her norks - out. And since Kate Winslet has an interview in the new issue of Vanity Fair, it stands to reason that she should get as absolutely naked as flipping possible in every single accompanying picture. But here's the crazy thing - Kate Winslet's naked body actually looks fairly decent in the photos. And this is chubby old Kate Winslet we're talking about here - lumpy bumpy old chubby old Kate Winslet. So if her naked pictures looked good, it's only logical to assume that it was because they'd been mangled beyond all recognition with an airbrush. Just don't mention that around Kate Winslet, because there's a strong chance she'll punch your face off if she hears you.
Kid Who Hacked Miley Cyrus’ Gmail Gets Raided By The FBI
It wasn't so long ago that some guy hacked into Hanna Montana's Gmail account, stole some pictures of her soaking wet, and forced the world to look at them while they surfed the net at work and what-not. Such massive overexposure to a pretty much genderless, pre-pubescent body made everybody outside of the Glitter household puke at the same time. This vomit eventually trickled into the Atlantic, and then floated north until its acidic content had melted all the ice caps, robbing millions of polar bears of their natural hunting grounds, and covering their edible penguins in a filthy, orange coat of watery slime. Why PETA hasn't raised more of a stink about this we'll never know. Anyway - the guy that did the hacking, well he'd brag online about how the police would never find him because he moved too often. But now he's been raided by the FBI. We thought this might happen ever since we heard Cyrus would be playing the part of J Edgar Hoover in a sort of West Wing prequel. What we're saying is she's probably well connected.
It wasn't so long ago that some guy hacked into Hanna Montana's Gmail account, stole some pictures of her soaking wet, and forced the world to look at them while they surfed the net at work and what-not. Such massive overexposure to a pretty much genderless, pre-pubescent body made everybody outside of the Glitter household puke at the same time. This vomit eventually trickled into the Atlantic, and then floated north until its acidic content had melted all the ice caps, robbing millions of polar bears of their natural hunting grounds, and covering their edible penguins in a filthy, orange coat of watery slime. Why PETA hasn't raised more of a stink about this we'll never know. Anyway - the guy that did the hacking, well he'd brag online about how the police would never find him because he moved too often. But now he's been raided by the FBI. We thought this might happen ever since we heard Cyrus would be playing the part of J Edgar Hoover in a sort of West Wing prequel. What we're saying is she's probably well connected.
W: Now With Babies Chomping On Angelina Jolie’s Knockers
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie moved to Europe partly to escape the slavering media attention they have to deal with all the time in America. That should be applauded - it's easy to forget that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are real people. As such they need to protect their privacy with as much vigour as they possibly muster. There are some things that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have to keep for themselves, and we should respect that. Unless, you know, Angelina Jolie's got a new film coming out, in which case it's perfectly OK for Brad Pitt to take a picture of her with a baby's mouth clamped around the end of her boob and then sell it to W magazine for cash as a covershot. That's right kids - those Angelina Jolie breastfeeding photos you've been anticipating with equal horror and arousal are finally here.
Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie moved to Europe partly to escape the slavering media attention they have to deal with all the time in America. That should be applauded - it's easy to forget that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are real people. As such they need to protect their privacy with as much vigour as they possibly muster. There are some things that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have to keep for themselves, and we should respect that. Unless, you know, Angelina Jolie's got a new film coming out, in which case it's perfectly OK for Brad Pitt to take a picture of her with a baby's mouth clamped around the end of her boob and then sell it to W magazine for cash as a covershot. That's right kids - those Angelina Jolie breastfeeding photos you've been anticipating with equal horror and arousal are finally here.
Minnie Driver Slaps Her Baby Up On MySpace
Minnie Driver doesn't know the rules - celebrity babies only exist to supplement their parents' giant wages via megabucks magazine deals. But that particular memo doesn't appear to have reached Minnie Driver, because she's just done the unthinkable - she's posted a photo of her new son Henry on MySpace. For free. What a massive idiot. Doesn't Minnie Driver know what she's missing? With all the public interest in her, Minnie Driver could have secured herself a huge cheque for the exclusive rights to those photos instead of spunking them away for free on the internet. She could have bought herself something really nice with that photoshoot money, like a plastic watch or a pair of flipflops or a couple of loaves of bread or something. Tsk.
Minnie Driver doesn't know the rules - celebrity babies only exist to supplement their parents' giant wages via megabucks magazine deals. But that particular memo doesn't appear to have reached Minnie Driver, because she's just done the unthinkable - she's posted a photo of her new son Henry on MySpace. For free. What a massive idiot. Doesn't Minnie Driver know what she's missing? With all the public interest in her, Minnie Driver could have secured herself a huge cheque for the exclusive rights to those photos instead of spunking them away for free on the internet. She could have bought herself something really nice with that photoshoot money, like a plastic watch or a pair of flipflops or a couple of loaves of bread or something. Tsk.
Jamie Lynn Spears Does Porn In A Vague, Creepy, Unsexy Way
We don't know who to feel more sorry for - Jamie Lynn Spears or the man who seems to think that a photo of Jamie Lynn Spears breastfeeding is sexy. Because, apparently, somebody actually thinks that. There's currently a huge investigation going on in America after a photo of Jamie Lynn Spears breastfeeding with a boob exposed was apparently copied several times with the intention to post them onto the internet or sell them for profit. And since Jamie Lynn Spears is under the age of 18, the thief could technically be hauled up on a pornography charge. We think we should probably point out at this juncture that the allegedly stolen photo is of Jamie Lynn Spears breastfeeding her baby, and not of Jamie Lynn Spears being breastfed by her own mother. We know that Jamie Lynn Spears is only young, but that's no excuse for weirdness.
We don't know who to feel more sorry for - Jamie Lynn Spears or the man who seems to think that a photo of Jamie Lynn Spears breastfeeding is sexy. Because, apparently, somebody actually thinks that. There's currently a huge investigation going on in America after a photo of Jamie Lynn Spears breastfeeding with a boob exposed was apparently copied several times with the intention to post them onto the internet or sell them for profit. And since Jamie Lynn Spears is under the age of 18, the thief could technically be hauled up on a pornography charge. We think we should probably point out at this juncture that the allegedly stolen photo is of Jamie Lynn Spears breastfeeding her baby, and not of Jamie Lynn Spears being breastfed by her own mother. We know that Jamie Lynn Spears is only young, but that's no excuse for weirdness.
Miley Cyrus in Appearing Nearly Nude Non-Shocker. Again.
No. Just no. There's a line, it was already crossed and now it's being urinated on from the other side. This has to stop. Right now. One more time, for the road, Miley Cyrus has got half naked, someone has taken photos and one more time, for the road, they have been uploaded on to the internet. And we all know how very much the world of the internet loves pictures of 15-year-olds in small amounts of clothing. She's fifteen, people. Stop it. If this were a no-name young girl from Bognor Regis then whomever uploaded these pictures would probably receive something of a slapped wrist by the local authorities, but because it's a superstar Disney child-celeb it's all fine to go plastering half the internet with scantly-clad photographs of her. Go on - search for it. You'll find them on supposedly respectable sites, including FOX News. This is the same FOX News that cries crocodile tears and attempts to whip up public outrage every time anything 'immoral' happens in the world. Apparently a small girl in her underwear doesn't qualify for that same outrage - in fact, it's news.
No. Just no. There's a line, it was already crossed and now it's being urinated on from the other side. This has to stop. Right now. One more time, for the road, Miley Cyrus has got half naked, someone has taken photos and one more time, for the road, they have been uploaded on to the internet. And we all know how very much the world of the internet loves pictures of 15-year-olds in small amounts of clothing. She's fifteen, people. Stop it. If this were a no-name young girl from Bognor Regis then whomever uploaded these pictures would probably receive something of a slapped wrist by the local authorities, but because it's a superstar Disney child-celeb it's all fine to go plastering half the internet with scantly-clad photographs of her. Go on - search for it. You'll find them on supposedly respectable sites, including FOX News. This is the same FOX News that cries crocodile tears and attempts to whip up public outrage every time anything 'immoral' happens in the world. Apparently a small girl in her underwear doesn't qualify for that same outrage - in fact, it's news.
