Articles tagged with: Peter Andre
WEBTHUMP! 21 October 2009
10 - Here's a lovely man from a pub - WatchWithMothers 9 - Jordan & Peter Andre: They're still at it, you know - AmyGrindhouse 8 - Goodness. Our pals Interestment were on the telly this week. Look - BBC 7 - The Lovely Bones: good if you like to see Mark Wahlberg wearing clothes from the 1970s - ClothesOnFilm
Peter Andre Doesn’t Want Transvestites Near His Kids, So Back Off
It’s perfectly clear that Peter Andre likes humans with genitals that are the opposite of his. Take his famous pop song Mysterious Girl. We’ve been able to deceiver that this song is about women. In the song he wants to “get close” to this Mysterious Girl, but why? Did she smell nice? Or had she just baked a pie? Either way, Peter Andre knows the difference between men and women, and that's something he's keen to pass onto his children. So he’s got something else to squeeze into a few episodes of his rubbish ITV2 show. You see, Peter isn’t overly keen that Katie Price’s new boyfriend Alex Reid likes to dress up in pretty frocks and makeup.
It’s perfectly clear that Peter Andre likes humans with genitals that are the opposite of his. Take his famous pop song Mysterious Girl. We’ve been able to deceiver that this song is about women. In the song he wants to “get close” to this Mysterious Girl, but why? Did she smell nice? Or had she just baked a pie? Either way, Peter Andre knows the difference between men and women, and that's something he's keen to pass onto his children. So he’s got something else to squeeze into a few episodes of his rubbish ITV2 show. You see, Peter isn’t overly keen that Katie Price’s new boyfriend Alex Reid likes to dress up in pretty frocks and makeup.
Nobody Wants To Stock Jordan’s Millionth Autobiography
Such is the world we live in today that when you quiz a group of children about Jordan, they won’t know any facts about the country. Instead, they’ll spout endless facts about Jordan the model with pinpoint accuracy; which might have something to do with the fact that she won't stop banging on about herself. In the 31 years that Jordan/Katie Price has been on the planet, she’s done many things. Slept with footballers, posed topless in magazines, had a baby, took the virginity of a rubbish popstar, gone on the jungle show, married another yet another rubbish popstar, had some more kids, divorced the popstar and met a cage fighter. Jesus, you don’t need multiple autobiographies to explain that do you? Apparently so if you’re Jordan - she’s onto her fourth.
Such is the world we live in today that when you quiz a group of children about Jordan, they won’t know any facts about the country. Instead, they’ll spout endless facts about Jordan the model with pinpoint accuracy; which might have something to do with the fact that she won't stop banging on about herself. In the 31 years that Jordan/Katie Price has been on the planet, she’s done many things. Slept with footballers, posed topless in magazines, had a baby, took the virginity of a rubbish popstar, gone on the jungle show, married another yet another rubbish popstar, had some more kids, divorced the popstar and met a cage fighter. Jesus, you don’t need multiple autobiographies to explain that do you? Apparently so if you’re Jordan - she’s onto her fourth.
Tabloid Watch: Jordan & Peter Andre
The overall impression I got from reading Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas was that he was taking drugs and reporting back so that you didn't have to. Well this week's been the same for me, but instead of the mind-expanding world that concerned Thompson, I am committed to the mind-reducing ignorance of the tabloids. Maybe, when I'm standing next to Littlejohn on the white cliffs of Dover shouting expletives in the direction of Europe you'll remember the sacrifice I made so that you could be enlightened and tolerant. This week: Jordan and Peter Andre and their continuing slow-motion car-crash of a divorce...
The overall impression I got from reading Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas was that he was taking drugs and reporting back so that you didn't have to. Well this week's been the same for me, but instead of the mind-expanding world that concerned Thompson, I am committed to the mind-reducing ignorance of the tabloids. Maybe, when I'm standing next to Littlejohn on the white cliffs of Dover shouting expletives in the direction of Europe you'll remember the sacrifice I made so that you could be enlightened and tolerant. This week: Jordan and Peter Andre and their continuing slow-motion car-crash of a divorce...
WEBTHUMP! August 5 2009
10 - They're coming. THEY'RE COMING! - Geekologie 9 - Important bikini news. You heard - Interestment 8 - Here's another thing that Matt Berry is humiliatingly good at - Watch With Mothers 7 - Parents: Vanessa Hudgens hates your children (sort of) - Amy Grindhouse
Peter Andre Falls Off A Stage. Let’s All LOL!
The curse of Jordan must still be lingering on inside the plastic soul of pop music gimp Peter Andre. Once upon a time he was happily married to Jordan, who herself was just a massive attention-seeking tit. All alongside her boob balloons which kept on inflating and deflating. Christ, it was almost hypnotic. Since their relationship ended, Peter Andre hasn’t done much TV work or spewed painful interviews about his marriage. Unlike his former wife Jordan. Or is she being called Katie Price again now? We don’t know. Or care. Anyways, Peter Andre fell off a stage at the T4 beach festival thingy. We got footage.
The curse of Jordan must still be lingering on inside the plastic soul of pop music gimp Peter Andre. Once upon a time he was happily married to Jordan, who herself was just a massive attention-seeking tit. All alongside her boob balloons which kept on inflating and deflating. Christ, it was almost hypnotic. Since their relationship ended, Peter Andre hasn’t done much TV work or spewed painful interviews about his marriage. Unlike his former wife Jordan. Or is she being called Katie Price again now? We don’t know. Or care. Anyways, Peter Andre fell off a stage at the T4 beach festival thingy. We got footage.
Peter Andre Blubs All Over The Gogglebox
Never let it be said we are anything but balanced, fair and righteous here at hecklerspray - we will always cover things from every angle available to us. Which is why we're now going to talk about the latest TV appearance by Peter Andre, where he gets all boo-hooey and says he's all about his kids and stuff, and then completely fails to see the connection between apologising for his life in the spotlight then announcing he has a new reality show currently filming. What a tool. See? We're not just mean to Katie Price. Though she is a giganto-titted monstrosity of Lovecraftian proportions.
Never let it be said we are anything but balanced, fair and righteous here at hecklerspray - we will always cover things from every angle available to us. Which is why we're now going to talk about the latest TV appearance by Peter Andre, where he gets all boo-hooey and says he's all about his kids and stuff, and then completely fails to see the connection between apologising for his life in the spotlight then announcing he has a new reality show currently filming. What a tool. See? We're not just mean to Katie Price. Though she is a giganto-titted monstrosity of Lovecraftian proportions.
TV Review: Katie Price Meets Piers Morgan
To the despair of Google Image users everywhere, there are several Jordans in the world: The basketball player, the Asian country and the brand of Nike Airs to name just three. However, potential masturbators will be most familiar with the variable-titted cock-holster better known as Katie Price. As promised on Twitter, Katie has been keeping a dignified silence about her divorce with Aussie warbler Peter Andre, breaking it only briefly to swear about him. Which is about as dignified as you can get without talking to Piers Morgan on TV and revealing all - thankfully not literally: one slimy twat is more than enough.
To the despair of Google Image users everywhere, there are several Jordans in the world: The basketball player, the Asian country and the brand of Nike Airs to name just three. However, potential masturbators will be most familiar with the variable-titted cock-holster better known as Katie Price. As promised on Twitter, Katie has been keeping a dignified silence about her divorce with Aussie warbler Peter Andre, breaking it only briefly to swear about him. Which is about as dignified as you can get without talking to Piers Morgan on TV and revealing all - thankfully not literally: one slimy twat is more than enough.
