Kevin James’ varied CV has thus far featured a wealth of memorable creations.

Bumbling fat-guy in King of Queens, bumbling fat-guy in Hitch and bumbling fat-guy in I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry – there hasn’t been such a startling auteur with this much range since John Candy.

And like Candy (which James clearly does), Kevin manages to make what is an otherwise down on his luck cardboard cutout into a likeable chubby action hero – Paul Blart. This is silly fun, the kind that makes children laugh until they’re rolling around dribbling, while leaving adults to exclaim ‘meh’.

Forgettable escapism is on the cards, something that doesn’t feel bogged down by issues – apparently it became trendy in the mid-noughties to try and give audience diabetes through sugary, issue and moral-laced comedies.

Fortunately, the only person suffering from such a  disease is the title character himself. Moustached, well-fed and full of beans, Blart is the type of character that isn’t trying to do anything new except being likeable and amusing.

Credit to James, who has filled a hole missing from cinema with ease. He brings the chubby, funny goon back to the screen, and does so without the sentimental streak that burdens the genre.

When the doughnuts are down and Blart becomes a 20-stone Bruce Willis, he works his way through a mall of criminals, taking them down one by one. The film kicks up a gear when the action starts – fortunately for Blart, the bad guys manage to make it easy to root for the good guy. Rather than menacing super-criminals, they’re simply a bunch of skater boys jumping around, riding BMX’s and looking more like the type of dribbling sociopaths you’d normally find normally loitering outside Tesco. They seem frightened to actually fire any guns, preferring to just shout and run away from a fight with a guy who couldn’t swing his arms without getting heart failure.

Still, there had to be a concession made for believability, and further adding to this is the deer-in-headlights love interest Amy. It isn’t Douglas/Zeta-Jones bad and there is enough easy charm that they get away with it.

Really, you could write this review without seeing the actual film; an enjoyable comedy filled with tubby pratfalls and larger than life characters. It isn’t exactly David Lynch but is actually just a slice of good ol’ fun!

The extras are fairly robust (I will stop with the fat puns eventually), commentary with the director and James, deleted scenes, behind the scenes and plenty of back-slapping action to boot. A nice package, unfortunately featuring the most annoying DVD menu of all time but overall making a breezy lightweight DVD.

3/5

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Do you find yourself frequently becoming depressed because 24 isn’t as torture-y as it once was?

And do you also find yourself getting annoyed because Jack Bauer is a human man and not a mystical lion who acts as a badly-concealed Jesus metaphor ? You do? Well you’re not the only one, because Taken is this week’s number one movie at the weekend box office.

And Taken is exactly that – it’s a brutally violent thriller containing several scenes of graphic torture starring Aslan from the Narnia films. What more could you possibly ask for?

2009 seems to be the year where the US weekend box office answers all of our prayers. First we prayed about a witless comedy about a fat man on a Segway and Paul Blart: Mall Cop became the weekend box office number one for two weeks running.

And then we prayed for a film that’s a bit like 24 and a bit like The Bodyguard, only starring Aslan The Lion, the shit one from Lost and a failed popstar. And what do you know, Taken has become the top movie at the weekend box office. Don’t tell anyone, but next week we’re praying for remake of Bound starring Konnie Huq, Myleene Klass and the woman off the Lacoste advert. And so it will be. Here’s the US weekend box office top five…

1 - Taken (We should probably point out that this isn’t a remake of the Steven Spielberg TV show Taken. Or the 2002 horror movie Taken. Or the Canadian 2003 movie Taken. Or Taken In, Taken Out, Taken Alive, Taken Away, Taken By Force, Taken For Granted, or the videogame Tekken. It’s a completely new idea. Unless you’ve seen the first season of 24, that is, because it’s a total rip-off of that) $24,625,000

2 - Paul Blart: Mall Cop (This is a sad day, Paul Blart. Your reign as weekend box office champion has come to an end. But fear not, for you’ll live on forever both in our hearts and in the millions of pointless rip-off movies about fat Segway-riding men with limited authority that’ll inevitably come out in about 18 months) $14,000,000

3 - The Uninvited (The uninvited that this movie’s title specifically refers to is either Elizabeth Banks or a freaky dead child who looks like a severe burns victim. Of the two, we’d rather the latter showed up at our house uninvited. At least it’d have fewer dreary anecdotes about Zach Braff) $10,512,000

4 - Hotel For Dogs (A hotel for dogs! What a funny idea! Whatever next? Really, imagine that – a hotel for dogs. Oh, Hollywood. You’ve really outdone yourselves here. A hotel for dogs! We’ll have one of whatever you’re smoking! LOL!!!) $8,706,000

5 - Gran Torino (Gran Torino has now been a box office fixture for two months, which makes it the most popular movie about someone’s gran since Big Momma’s House 2) $8,600,000

Read more:

Weekend Box Office – Box Office Mojo

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