Parade - HecklerSpray

Just Out of a Coma? Then Newsflash: Robert Downey Jr. Did Drugs

March 24th, 2009 By hecklerspray staff

Life has been rough for Robert Downey, Jr, or ‘Downsey’ as he likes us to call him.

His life has been riddled with mistakes – drug abuse, incarceration, Gothika, public disgrace, dating Sarah Jessica Parker, singing a duet with Sting – and we’ve witnessed them all first hand.

So, for the first time ever since breakfast, Robert Downey Jr. openly talks about his past drug abuse, and does so with a nice vocabulary. He also talks about some other stuff, like a movie he’s in that’s coming out soon, or something.

Vince Vaughn Still Yammering On About Jennifer Aniston

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Nobody talks about The Break-Up any more, mainly for fear that it'll trigger some sort of psychotic post-traumatic stress malarkey and they'll end up with a nosebleed.

But just because The Break-Up was so dire that it makes us want to vomit poo into an elf's face, it doesn't mean that its stars Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston don't get along. In fact, although they spilt up in 2006, Vince Vaughn has told Parade magazine that he's still great friends with Jennifer Aniston.

If this means there's going to be a sequel to The Break-Up any time soon, so help us…

Katie Holmes Called ‘Mom’ By Tom Cruise’s Adorable Experiments

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Katie Holmes has slotted in so well to married life with Tom Cruise that Tom's children from his time with Nicole Kidman call her 'Mom' in their allotted thrice-monthly visits to her cage.

Katie Holmes revealed to Parade magazine that Tom's adopted children Isabella, 14, and Connor, 12, refer to her as 'Mom', even though 'very slightly older sister' would have probably been more apt. However, this sudden revelation is bound to upset Nicole Kidman profoundly, especially since she has said that the children now call her 'Nicole' against her wishes. Some have commented that this is all a deliberate ploy by Tom Cruise to turn the kids against Kidman, but we're not so sure – every kid knows the easiest way to get a bigger Christmas present from one divorced parent is pretend that you like the other divorced parent's new partner more than them.

Come on, that's rule number one, people.