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oscars dresses

Fact: nobody watches the Oscars because they like the films. They watch the Oscars because they like the dresses.

And this year’s Oscars red carpet didn’t disappoint. The frocks on show definitely heralded a new wave of old school glamour, with elegant silver and blue gowns de rigueur among this year’s crop of A-list fashionistas. It really was a glorious sight to behold.

Sadly, we haven’t been able to secure any of the copyrighted red carpet paparazzi photos from last night’s Oscars red carpet, so we’re afraid we can’t show them to you. However, undeterred, we’ve teamed up with a leading photo-realistic graphic agency to bring you a high-quality image gallery of last night’s greatest sartorial triumphs, utilising an array of cutting-edge CG technology. What you’re about to witness is so uncannily accurate that you’ll feel like you’re actually standing on the Oscars red carpet alongside the likes of Sandra Bullock and Kristen Stewart. You’re welcome…

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People only watch the Oscars for the red carpet fashion. This is because, deep down, everyone is a homosexual man.

But that poses a problem for us. This massive preoccupation with Oscars red carpet fashion leaves hecklerspray a little bit hamstrung – we didn’t send a photographer to the Oscars to take photos of the dresses, and we also don’t have enough money to pay the big picture agencies to use their red carpet photos.

However, this problem can be overcome with a little imaginative thinking. So join us after the jump for the first ever hecklerspray red carpet non-copyright gallery.

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