Playing Margaret Thatcher must be great for an actress like Meryl Streep. Thesps just love it when they get the chance to play vile people from history. Murderers, rapists, sex offenders and the like give an actor the opportunity to feel brave and bold.
And ol’ Streepy knew too well that pretty much everyone on Earth hates Thatcher. This is something that made her ”more interested” in portraying the heartless witch in ‘The Iron Lady’.
And Meryl has some theories on why everyone despised her so much and… well… she’s off the mark really.
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The North of England hates Margaret Thatcher almost unreservedly. Seriously. Being a Tory in Ultra-Labourite Manchester is akin to being a leper. A leper who likes the music of James Blunt. A James Blunt loving leper in a Liverpool FC shirt.
And so, when Meryl Streep appeared randomly at Freya and Graham McAnally’s wedding at Manchester town hall, you’d have to assume only one thing…
…that locals gathered ’round Streep, figured she was the closest thing they’d get to seeing Thatcher in the flesh, and kicked her to death.
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The best way to win the respect of your acting peers is to go ugly. Monstrously ugly. For example, people fawn over those brave enough to play Hitler. Or a wife-beater. Or some kind of sex offender.
In the case of Meryl Streep, she’s being touted as a likely Oscar winner for her turn as Margaret Thatcher in The Iron Lady.
It takes nerve to play the biggest on-screen monster since Cloverfield.
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When you’re in trouble, don’t call Batman, call Billy Crystal. Especially if you’re in need of a host of the Oscars. In fact, specifically if you’re in need of a last minute host for any awards ceremony.
That’s because Billy Crystal is pretty much unable to do anything other than be a vaguely charming awards presenter these days.
So good thing Eddie Murphy quit the job after some gay slurs made everyone quit the gig, right?
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There’s only one way to start an article about Piers Morgan and that’s with an unabashed string of obscenities and threats aimed squarely at the former Mirror editor and dough-faced clown. Unfortunately though, we have to be (minutely) more professional than that and would therefore urge you to launch your own insults at this image of his pompous face.
Still, what brings us to bother writing about alleged phone-hacker and self-confessed crymaxer, Morgan?
Well, it turns out that he’s had enough of being a sideshow to Howie Mandel (whoever the hell that is) and is taking time out to focus on becoming America’s most hated Pariah.
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Have you seen how outrageously great Eddie Murphy was back in his SNL days? Think about those fantastic films he made way back when! Beverley Hills Cop(s), Trading Places, Coming To America, 48hrs… not to mention stand-up films like Raw.
He was untouchable for a while. And then he went rubbish. Really, really dreadful.
In fact, it all started going wrong in the ’90s with dreck like The Nutty Professor, Shrek, Dr Dolittle and anything that enabled him to play all the characters at once. So what went wrong? It seems he stopped drinking, that’s what.
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The Oscars are great aren’t they? Tara Reid likened them to spending a few weeks in the Big Brother house… it really doesn’t get any better than that does it? And now, Eddie Murphy appears to have signed up for the show.
Now, you may be thinking that Eddie’s not done much since (allegedly) groping a drag queen’s bulge and successfully having sex with Mel B with no condom on, but you’d be wrong.
See, as Mel B found out when she had group sex with Murphy (Eddie playing the other six participants, including the token amusing overweight elderly lady), the Beverley Hills Cop has a plan to host and win all the Oscars in 2012.
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The stupid Oscars have been and gone, with only a very select few giving the remotest of shits. Those that include themselves in that number are the people who will be making posters of all of Colin Firth’s new films and the simpering, worthy smug git who condescends the Davina McCall lookalike on the BBC’s Film show.
Oh, and we imagine there’ll be a whole host of stupid fashion writers all squeeing over various items of clothing, mixed with tubby women widening their eyes at people who have made a fashion faux-pas.
And so, because we’re legally obliged to announce the winners of the Oscars 2011, we’ve copy and pasted the list from somewhere else and replaced all the names of the winners with videos so you can try and work out who won yourself.
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