Posts tagged as:

online game

SLACKERJACK – Fantastic Contraptions

by Stuart Heritage

Here’s a warning – Fantastic Contraptions is a game that requires a base level of construction know-how. If you don’t have any because, say, you’re a blogger which isn’t even a real job anyway, you’ll probably fare quite badly.

Anyway, in Fantastic Contraptions you have to build all sorts of little vehicles and, if we’ve got this right, they’ll fall apart and you’ll feel stupid. That might just be us.

Play Fantastic Contraptions now

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SLACKERJACK – Portal Defenders

by Stuart Heritage

As excellent as Streets Of Rage and Double Dragon were, they were really missing two important points. These were obviously children dressed as cats and a sense of moral responsibility. That’s where Portal Defenders comes in. It’s a side-scrolling beat ‘em up where several of your foes are children dressed as cats. And then, every [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Cap’n’Pop

by Stuart Heritage

Chain reaction games are ace, aren’t they? Especially ones where you spread Swine Flu. You don’t spread Swine Flu in Cap’n Pop, but don’t let that put you off.

Instead, Cap’n Pop is all about using chain reactions to inflate capsules until they pop. When they pop they inflate other capsules until they pop as well, and then you’ve got a load of popping capsules. Ergo, we like Cap’n Pop.

Play Cap’n Pop now

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SLACKERJACK – Power Up

by Stuart Heritage

These are the sort of robots we like. Not the ones intent on destroying humanity or the ones with mechanical vaginas in them that perverts own. The nice robots. And that’s what Power Up is all about. You have to connect two metal robot heads together with metal blocks so that they can pass electricity [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Super Mario Defence

by Stuart Heritage

Know how much Super Mario Defence has got in common with the real Super Mario? Nothing. Less than nothing. It’s ridiculous that it should even have the Super Mario name.

But is Super Mario Defence any good despite this? Well, sort of. It’s like another defence game you may have played, where you buy weapons to defend yourself against an invading hoard of baddies, except here all the baddies are Super Mario. It’s weird, but in a good way. We think.

Play Super Mario Defence now

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SLACKERJACK – Steer This Boat

by Stuart Heritage

This is a game called Steer This Boat. You’ll never guess what you have to do in it. No, really, you won’t.

OK, maybe you will. In Steer This Boat you have to steer a boat. But what with it being a boat and all, it’s obviously quite hard. So there you go. It should really have been called Steer This Boat Which Is Quite Difficult To Steer, because then we wouldn’t have had to write anything at all here.

Play Steer This Boat now

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SLACKERJACK – Orbital Decay

by Stuart Heritage

You there – are you a fan of never-ending blast ‘em ups that go on and on and on and never seem to get anywhere? You do? Good, because here’s Orbital Decay, and it’s exactly that. Orbital Decay is a little like a defence game in that you need to kit out your massive spaceship [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Pwong

by Stuart Heritage

A theory about Pong – it made videogames popular precisely because playing it wasn’t like having a giant bleach hallucination in the middle of an epilepsy attack. Now, if Pwong had been released instead of Pong it would have been a different story entirely. And that’s because Pwong is basically a version of Pong that’s [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Planet Basher

by Stuart Heritage

We’ll admit to having a few reservations about Planet Basher when we first started playing it, but the total disappearance of the last hour of our life is testament to its addictiveness. All you need to do in Planet Basher is launch a rocket at some stars to see how many you can collect. Start [...]

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SLACKERJACK – Sugarcore

by Stuart Heritage

Some online games look hard but are actually easy, others look easy but are actually hard. Which one is Sugarcore?

Neither. Sugarcore is a game that looks hard, but then you play and realise it’s easy, only to then realise that actually it’s hard. It’s a sort of breakout game where you rotate a ball of blocks against a procession of flying balls. Which sounds painfully simple, until you’ve found out that if the balls don’t smash a specified number of blocks, you fail. Got it? Good.

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