HecklerSpray

Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy

American Idol Might Fire Everyone, Twice, For A Laugh

By Stuart Heritage

Without its gleam-toothed, bumpube-haired talisman Simon Cowell, American Idol has found itself in a muddle.

What happens now? Can American Idol survive? Can it bank on Randy Jackson to speak in full sentences from now on? Or Ellen DeGeneres to stop being so tediously nice all the time? Or Kara DioGuardi to finally work out what her point is? Probably not. And that’s why they might all be getting sacked quite soon.

If reports are to be believed, former American Idol producer Nigel Lythgoe might be about to return to the show. And if that happens, it’s expected that his first move will involve firing Randy, Ellen and Kara and bringing in Justin Timberlake, Elton John and Usher as judges. No word on who’ll replace Ryan Seacrest, though. He is being replaced, right? Oh, say that he’s being replaced.

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So You Think You Can Da… Hang On, Is That A Vagina?

By Stuart Heritage

So You Think You Can Dance, So You Think You Can Dance vagina, Nigel LythgoeDid you see the gigantic vagina on So You Think You Can Dance this week? No, we don’t mean Nigel Lythgoe.

The actual gigantic vagina. No, really, we fully understand that any TV show featuring so many close-ups of Nigel Lythgoe’s great big mingey smug face might desensitise viewers to the sight of any female genitalia, but So You Think You Can Dance literally broadcast footage of a contestant’s vagina this week. Or at least something close enough to ensure that everyone’s talking about it.

Readers should be warned that the following contains graphic, unsettling descriptions of Nigel Lythgoe’s face.

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