Articles tagged with: nick jonas
Sorry Everyone On Earth, The Jonas Brothers Aren’t Splitting Up
Sorry. You were probably having quite a good day, weren't you? And now we've come along and trampled all over it. Or worse. Maybe you were having a terrible day. And maybe the news that The Jonas Brothers aren't splitting up will be the last straw for you. Maybe hearing this will be what finally pushes you to climb that clocktower so you can start systematically blasting away at strangers with a sniper rifle until you're inevitably taken out by a police helicopter. Either way, The Jonas Brothers aren't splitting up. In fact, The Jonas Brothers are so not splitting up that they've gone to the trouble of actually telling people that they're not splitting up. Sorry.
Sorry. You were probably having quite a good day, weren't you? And now we've come along and trampled all over it. Or worse. Maybe you were having a terrible day. And maybe the news that The Jonas Brothers aren't splitting up will be the last straw for you. Maybe hearing this will be what finally pushes you to climb that clocktower so you can start systematically blasting away at strangers with a sniper rifle until you're inevitably taken out by a police helicopter. Either way, The Jonas Brothers aren't splitting up. In fact, The Jonas Brothers are so not splitting up that they've gone to the trouble of actually telling people that they're not splitting up. Sorry.
Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers. This is News, How, Exactly?
Talking about Miley Cyrus all the time may be bad enough, but then we have to go and bring in this Jonas Brothers kid in just to see how far things can actually go downhill. As if covering the near-endless slew of nearly naked pictures of a 15-year-old isn't bad enough, now the media feels compelled to report on the fact that two 15-year-olds used to go out with each other. For a bit. And young Hannah Montana has gone and told us all about it. And hecklerspray apparently feels the need to talk about it. If there was an ounce of dignity left in the world, this 'news' is surely the swansong for that poor little blighter. It never stood a chance. Yet there it is, splashed all over the entertainment press: "Miley Cyrus: Breaking Up With Nick Jonas Was Hard" or the much more tempting: "Miley Cyrus: ‘Maybe I’ll End Up Marrying Nick Jonas’" - every publication getting in its own two cents on the matter, covering a two year relationship between two very young teenagers. And this is news. That people want to read. Can someone wake us up from the medically-enforced coma we're about to put ourselves in when the world stops being so clinically insane, thanks.
Talking about Miley Cyrus all the time may be bad enough, but then we have to go and bring in this Jonas Brothers kid in just to see how far things can actually go downhill. As if covering the near-endless slew of nearly naked pictures of a 15-year-old isn't bad enough, now the media feels compelled to report on the fact that two 15-year-olds used to go out with each other. For a bit. And young Hannah Montana has gone and told us all about it. And hecklerspray apparently feels the need to talk about it. If there was an ounce of dignity left in the world, this 'news' is surely the swansong for that poor little blighter. It never stood a chance. Yet there it is, splashed all over the entertainment press: "Miley Cyrus: Breaking Up With Nick Jonas Was Hard" or the much more tempting: "Miley Cyrus: ‘Maybe I’ll End Up Marrying Nick Jonas’" - every publication getting in its own two cents on the matter, covering a two year relationship between two very young teenagers. And this is news. That people want to read. Can someone wake us up from the medically-enforced coma we're about to put ourselves in when the world stops being so clinically insane, thanks.
