We've often thought about suing the studio behind Lord Of The Rings, but that's mainly because Return Of The King was so turgid that it was all we could do not to try and suffocate ourselves in the middle of the second act.
However, a group of JRR Tolkien heirs called the Tolkien Trust has decided to sue the Lord Of The Rings studio for a slightly more pressing matter – it's claiming that New Line owes it $150 million in unpaid royalties.
Of course, $150 million is a lot of money, and if New Line is forced to pay it to the Tolkien Trust, one of its upcoming films might gave to be cancelled. So, if it's the sequel to The Golden Compass, everybody wins.
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Lava doesn't boil – it makes way for Earth farts. Granted, it may sometimes look as if its boiling, but that's just visual trickery provided by, as we already said, Earth farts. Air bubbles and what not.
No doubt this is the angle New Line intends to play with the new Hobbit movies that are finally moving forward. 'Surprise! The ring's not really destroyed, its just been resting next to a planet sized colon.' Real juvenile New Line! We'll not reward such nonsense with our money! Or our Mom's money! Sure, it's free from the government, but it's because she's disabled! Grow up New Line Cinema!
In more surprising news, Peter Jackson is definitely going to be attached to the film. He and New Line settled their disagreement allowing things to progress. He's not going to direct though. He's going to play King Kong who now conveniently has to destroy the ring the rest of the way. Seriously, it says so on page 12 in the book 'The Real Tolkien volume III,' which we wrote.
Which we intend to write. Maybe next week. We intend to write a Tolkien book maybe next week.
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Lava doesn't boil - it makes way for Earth farts. Granted, it may sometimes look as if its boiling, but that's just visual trickery provided by, as we already said, Earth farts. Air bubbles and what not.
No doubt this is the angle New Line intends to play with the new Hobbit movies that are finally moving forward. 'Surprise! The ring's not really destroyed, its just been resting next to a planet sized colon.' Real juvenile New Line! We'll not reward such nonsense with our money! Or our Mom's money! Sure, it's free from the government, but it's because she's disabled! Grow up New Line Cinema!
In more surprising news, Peter Jackson is definitely going to be attached to the film. He and New Line settled their disagreement allowing things to progress. He's not going to direct though. He's going to play King Kong who now conveniently has to destroy the ring the rest of the way. Seriously, it says so on page 12 in the book 'The Real Tolkien volume III,' which we wrote.
Which we intend to write. Maybe next week. We intend to write a Tolkien book maybe next week.
