Articles tagged with: neck
Ed McMahon’s House Way Too Expensive For Ed McMahon’s Wallet
When we were in sixth grade we got to school one day, and three periods in when it was our turn to give the in-depth presentation that we’d worked on for over a week – it wasn’t in our bag. We turned our desk inside-out that day – but to no avail. We were crying at the window as our teacher wrote a big red F next to our name in his spiral grade-book, that’s when we saw it – Ed McMahon sprinting across the playground with our missing assignment in hand. He was more dragging it, actually. After all the thing was over 20 feet long. We’d invented the Publisher’s Clearing House giant check printer. We would have gladly shared it with the world for free – but McMahon wouldn’t allow it. He patented the blue prints and made millions. It doesn’t matter now though because it wasn’t enough – his house is going into foreclosure. That’s karma, Ed. You are just like China.
When we were in sixth grade we got to school one day, and three periods in when it was our turn to give the in-depth presentation that we’d worked on for over a week – it wasn’t in our bag. We turned our desk inside-out that day – but to no avail. We were crying at the window as our teacher wrote a big red F next to our name in his spiral grade-book, that’s when we saw it – Ed McMahon sprinting across the playground with our missing assignment in hand. He was more dragging it, actually. After all the thing was over 20 feet long. We’d invented the Publisher’s Clearing House giant check printer. We would have gladly shared it with the world for free – but McMahon wouldn’t allow it. He patented the blue prints and made millions. It doesn’t matter now though because it wasn’t enough – his house is going into foreclosure. That’s karma, Ed. You are just like China.
Gary Busey: Sorry I Dribbled All Over Your Neck, Jennifer Garner
Quickly - who won at the Oscars this year? You can't remember, can you.
It's OK, nor can anyone. Because this year, the Oscars weren't about stupid things like 'films' and 'artistic excellence' - they were about Gary Busey drooling all over Jennifer Garner's neck until she looked like she was about to cry.
And now, about six weeks after everyone forgot that he even did it, Gary Busey has issued a statement apologising to Jennifer Garner for any distress he caused. Apparently he was aiming his spittle for her cleavage or something. He didn't say that, exactly, but it'd just make sense.
