Nadya Suleman - HecklerSpray

Octomom Nadya Suleman Finally Seeks Treatment for Baby-Making Addiction

March 23rd, 2013 By Chris Chambers

Over the weekend, Nadya Suleman, porn star and mother of 14,?began a 30-day stint at a?rehab facility in Southern California?to treat?a prescription drug dependency. Dubbed “Octomom” by the media after giving birth to octuplets in 2009, Nadya is?an extremely?controversial figure, and not merely because of her non-traditional and apparently insatiable penchant for?procreation.

Unmarried and partner-less, 37-year old Nadya has six older children in addition to the octuplets?for a grand total of 14, all of them conceived via in-vitro fertilization (IVF) with a sperm donor. Until her recent foray into the adult entertainment industry, she was unemployed and receiving public assistance. Her choice to medically reproduce under such circumstances has, therefore,?been widely criticized.

Octomom Poses Nude For Cash, Which Is Just What We All Wanted

August 17th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

You remember Octomom right? She’s the woman who gave birth to FOURTEEN octopus babies. Calamarvelous! Of course, being such a gigantic freak show, the world’s press pounded her door day and night for a piece of the action.

All the while, mucky pups inundated her with requests to get the chance to photograph her while she was in the nude.

Octopus Woman swore she’d never disrobe for cash… but then the bills started to pile up. And so, now,?desperate for money, she’s got her kit off and decided to show the world the body that spat out little tentacle babies!

‘Octomom’ Hates Babies Which Is Really Unfortunate For Her

July 21st, 2011 By hecklerspray staff

Nadya ?Octomom? Suleman, the woman who chose to impregnate herself with eight foetuses, in addition to the six children she already had, has admitted in an interview that she hates babies, and that they make her sick.

The interview in question is from US magazine InTouch, where Suleman is quoted as saying, ?Whenever I hear a baby cry, I cringe. I do not like babies.” continuing, “I am absolutely disgusted by babies. They make me sick … I don’t even look at them. I have to look away.”

In the same interview, living incubator Suleman, also admitted to locking herself in the bathroom in an attempt to just to get away from the fourteen disgusting creatures who ruined her insides and part of her outsides.

Octomom Makes Hilarious Fetish Tape Using One Of Her Many Offspring’s Toys, Which Is Nice

January 24th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Remember Octomom, Nadya Suleman? Of course you do. She’s the woman who gave birth to an octopus. Not only did she give birth to an octopus, but she’s famous for firing out babies out of her fanny like she’s some kind of conveyor belt for idiots.

Imagine what it must be like living next door to her. If you’ve ever lived next door to a family with young children, you’ll know of the relentless hell of constant cackling and screaming from these dirty little mouth-breathers, with their wax candles of snot above their top lips and pissing all over the place.

So while the constant noise and smell of ammonia is bad enough, imagine if you will, while you’re looking out of your window to see if throwing yourself out of it would actually end your life, seeing a troupe of men in nappies and bonnets turning up to be spanked and filmed for mucky videos.

Octomom Appears On TV, Is Weird

February 25th, 2010 By Stuart Heritage

Octomom Nadya Suleman has come in for a lot of stick since giving birth to all those children last year.

And it’s unfair. Just because she convinced a doctor to fill her with so many embryos that throughout her pregnancy you could hear them all screaming in terror like people trapped in a burning skyscraper every time she so much as bent over, it doesn’t mean that Nadya Suleman isn’t normal. And yesterday she appeared on The View to prove how normal she is.

That said, what Nadya Suleman actually did was babble and yelp and squeak and wail and contradict herself several times within the space of the same breath and show everyone what she looks like in swimwear and generally make Whoopi Goldberg pull a face like she was being forced to watch a video of graphic animal cruelty. Job done, then.

Octomom’s Gazillion Kids Get Doctor In Trouble

January 6th, 2010 By Stuart Heritage

Following the Gosselin implosion, you may have wondered where all your Irresponsibly Gigantic Family news would come from.

Well, good news! Octomom is here again! Now, true, Octomom might lack Kate Gosselin‘s barmy hair, or Jon Gosselin‘s barmy hair or the Duggar family‘s crackpot religious beliefs, but she does have one thing – approximately 19 billion children. And presumably chronic exhaustion. And presumably a massive flap of loose, veiny skin dangling from her abdomen that looks like Hagrid‘s gigantic, billowing nutsack.

But let’s focus on the kid thing for now. Octomom has, in fact, got so many children that her fertility doctor has been accused of gross negligence and could lose his medical license as a result. So that’s fun.

Stupid Court Spoils Octomom’s Brilliant Child-Exploiting Plans

July 28th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Like Jon and Kate Plus 8? Think there are too many men and too few kids in it? Then thank heavens for Octomom!

She’s got her own show! On September 1, Octomom Nadya Suleman will begin shooting a new reality show along with her adorable child infestation. What format will the Octomom reality show take? We’re not sure, but we hear that the shortlist involves either training the children to sweep chimneys or using them to clear minefields.

Or it would, if only a judge hadn’t just ordered a lawyer to ensure that Nadya Suleman doesn’t exploit the kids. Stupid judge. Grr.

Octomom Vs Kate Gosselin: It’s A Flappy Vag-Off!

June 3rd, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

On paper, Octomom Nadya Suleman and Kate Gosselin have a lot in common. OK, OK, that was a slight exaggeration.

In reality Nadya Suleman and Kate Gosselin only have one thing in common – their borderline-horrific ability to twang a constant deluge of babies from their knackered old birth canals like a fleshy out of control howitzer. And their relentless profiteering from that ability. And their simmering hatred for one another. Alright, they’ve got three things in common. Sorry.

Anyway, Nadya Suleman and Kate Gosselin think that the other one should stop attention-seeking so much. You know what? They’re both right.

Octomom Trademarks Her Name & Flappy Introitus

April 16th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

We know what you’re thinking – all this talk of Nadya Suleman has made you hungry for Octomon-branded cornflakes.

Incidentally, they’re just like normal cornflakes. Except, you know, they look a bit like Angelina Jolie, they cost millions of dollars in taxpayer’s money and you could comfortably drive a tractor up their vaginas without even making them flinch.

But that’s not the point – the point is that Nadya Suleman knows that she’s hot property, which is why she’s currently trying to trademark the Octomom brand. Sorry other opportunistic mothers of eight babies – it’s either Eightomom, Huitmere, Babybabybabybabybabybabybabybabymom or Heptamom +1 for you.

Octomom Nadya Suleman Takes Some Kids Home Or Something

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Remember Nadya Suleman, the would-be pornstar and chronic Angelina Jolie fetishist who’s all over the news?

It turns out she’s had some babies. That’s pretty shoddy timing if you ask us. How on Earth is Nadya Suleman going to juggle motherhood with her very obvious quest of being on all the television shows, magazines, newspapers and websites in the world simultaneously forever? It’s a letdown.

And, worse still, some of the children that Nadya Suleman had now live with her. You might not think that’s news, by the way, but helicopters were filming it so technically it is. So there.