Articles tagged with: murder
You know how all those VH1 reality dating shows have kind of become formulaic? Well they're not anymore - now they involve actual murders to keep them interesting. To be clear the bonafide homicide didn't happen on camera - but it was performed by one of their former contestants. The show was Megan Wants A Millionaire, and the apparently fleeing contestant is Ryan Alexander Jenkins. He high stepped it to Canada, you see. And now the American authorities can basically only sit on the US side of the border playing a high stakes game of Whack-A-Mole should he show his face again.
We've missed Phil Spector. Like many people we see him as the lesbian-haired wobbly old uncle who nobody trusts around women that we never had. And that's why we should all be greeting the retrial of Phil Spector over the alleged murder of Lana Clarkson like the celebration it is. For the next few months we get to go over all of Phil Spector's greatest hits - the funny hair, the driver who he apparently confessed the murder to, the endless scientific discussions about bullet trajectory, the funny hair. The funny hair. And that all starts right now. Well, OK, not right now. The second crack at the Phil Spector murder trial was set to begin yesterday, but it couldn't because a juror fell over in the car park and broke his foot, forcing a postponement. Remember that if Phil Spector is found guilty of murder he'll be given life in jail. So probably about a fortnight at this rate.
We've all, at one point or another, fantasised about stamping on Elmo's throat just to stop him referring to himself in the third-person. But that's probably as far as Muppet murder has ever got. But that can all change now, because The Jim Henson Co has decided to make a movie about - and this isn't a joke - an alcoholic, murder-solving puppet detective on the hunt for a killer in a world where puppets and humans coexist. The movie - The Happytime Murders - is said to have dark adult themes and won't be suitable for children. What's more, it's apparently based on the time that Big Bird got wrecked on crack and went mental with a hedge-trimmer up Mr Snuffleupagus' rectum. Ah, the 1980s.
PR stunts are wonderful things. Well, that's a lie - they tend to be pretty rubbish in the most part, and aside from the odd grandiose piece of artistic wondery they tend to highlight how awful the world of marketing and PR is. Just ask Ashanti, whose marketing team decided it would be a good idea to encourage ultraviolence, if not murder, with fans of the R&B 'star'. It's a bold move, that's for sure, but we can't help but think it's one that should have had a little more thought put into it before being unleashed on the world.
Marilyn Monroe was tricked into killing herself by Bobby Kennedy. So says Dr Jack Hattem, who, backed up by secret FBI files, says the Hollywood bombshell was somehow fooled into believing she would be revived in time as part of a plot involving Senator Robert Kennedy, the brother of JFK, who was gunned down 40 years ago this week. Instead, Monroe, who staged many fake suicide attempts throughout her life to gain sympathy, was left to die by staff and friends. It's all in Hattem's new book Marilyn Monroe: Murder By Consent. Certainly, Marilyn Monroe may have been dead for 46 years, but that doesn't mean that people have stopped speculating about the circumstances of her death. We spoke to Dr Hattem and listened to some of his more compelling claims, including where Kennedy was on the night of Marilyn Monroe's death and why the recently unearthed Marilyn Monroe sex tape might not be the only one knocking about.
Ex-pop-singing-sensation Lily Allen’s father (or - as he was once known - ‘Keith Allen’) has told one ‘n’ all he’s of the fancy that our Lady Diana, Princess of Wales, did not die because of some arbitrary misfortune, but that she was in fact dealt the somewhat more illegal misfortune of murder.
Just what is the man thinking? How does he grow such testicles?
According to The Royalist, ex-pop-singing-sensation Lily Allen’s father (let us call him EPSSLAF) has gone on record to say:
"To this day I absolutely believe that it wasn’t an accident. I just know."
And if he doesn’t believe it was an accident, it remains only that he believes it was murder. He doesn’t appear to have elaborated on what ground he has to stand on as of yet, merely that he ‘just knows’.
Good news, people: the world’s second biggest twat, otherwise known as Jonathan Edward Borrell, is to be murdered.
OK, OK, yeahyeahyeah, it’s only going to happen in a movie, but sometimes life imitates art, right? Right? Right. We can but hope. Our fingers remain firmly crossed.
Borrell is to star in the new film by Antonia Bird and Irvine Welsh, named The Meat Trade, and will be killed by two grave robbers, played by Robert Carlyle and Colin Firth. Jonathan Edward told the Daily Star:
"It's going to be so much fun. I love horror and I'm a really big fan of Irvine Welsh's work. I loved Trainspotting."
