muppets - HecklerSpray

The Muppets Are BRAINWASHING Our Children To Be Simpering Liberals!

December 6th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Look. Look at those Muppet swine. Legless, non-blinking, fix-faced idiots. They are responsible for the moral decay of the entire world, thanks mostly to everyone being despairingly angry about the existence of Muppet Babies.

Worse than the fact Kermit walks around naked all the time, is their awful, awful agenda.

And thank God Fox is on hand to point out how EVIL all the collected Muppets really are. That’s right! hecklerspray and Fox are onto you Henson spawn! We know what you’re up to! When you’re not pushing porn songs at everyone, you’ve got a political agenda to BRAINWASH our innocent little children’s minds with! You ain’t fooling us anymore, you cute little ghoulish lefties!

What Links The Muppets To Italian Soft Core Pornography?

December 1st, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Those Muppets are pretty sweet, wholesome things aren’t they? They’re all cute and furry and funnier than a politician falling down a manhole. They’ll never get involved in any sex scandals or anything like that… not like stupid human celebs.

BUT WAIT! WHAT’S THIS?!

There’s a big ol’ link from The Muppets to soft core Italian porn! What’s going on? Are all our dreams about to be ruined? Are we actually going to start getting aroused by the new Muppets movie?! Let us explain…

Donatella Versace Doesn’t Want Non-Anorexics To Wear Her Clothes. Here’s Why She’s Right

November 16th, 2011 By Robin Darke

It seems like the highly anticipated, but probably ultimately disappointing, collaboration between Versace and H&M is headed for rocky roads. Roads that are as rocky as Donatella Versace?s face.

That’s because the raggedy face fashion luminaire has decided, a few days before the actual range lands in stores, that she doesn't like the look of people who don't advocate bulimia as a life choice, and doesn't want to taint her precious designs by putting them on fatties.

Ridiculous, right? Well, probably not.

Watch Clips Of The New Muppets Movie & Brighten Your Otherwise Dull Life

November 10th, 2011 By hecklerspray staff

Hecklerspray is known for not really liking anything but when it comes to fuzzy-wuzzy, cuddly, comedic characters- we’re all over it. So you can imagine our delight when we realised that the new Muppets film draws ever closer.

The Muppets is going to be wonderful. Even if it’s the worst film ever made by human hands, it will still be wonderful, such is the strength of feeling and nostalgia for Jim Henson’s creation. That’s the kind of film that people want to see.

Admittedly, the film company seems to think that those of us in the UK want to wait three months before we see the film in cinemas but you can’t have everything.

Sesame Street Force Porn Onto Our Children’s Innocent Little Brains

October 17th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Sesame Street. Not nearly as innocent as you think. Seriously. It should be called Sesmutty Street after they threw a load of sexy filth at the eyes of the world’s children, presumably getting big furry erections and laughing at our outrage.

The official line on all of this is that the Sesame Street YouTube channel got taken offline after hackers uploaded pornographic videos.

Big Bird, Elmo and Co. are ruthlessly blaming it on some hacker called ‘Mredxwx’. Mr Ed himself has come out and said it isn’t him, mainly because his hooves and computer keyboards don’t get on. However, we can exclusively reveal that Sesame Street is, and always has been, absolute filth.

Let Us All Cry At Being Elmo [Trailer]

September 29th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Yes, yes… it’s all very well being cynical and cool all the time because it means that you never have to go out on a limb and say you like something that someone else may point out is entirely gash… but sometimes you really have to.

And surely even the most cold-hearted gitwurst couldn’t fail to be thawed by the antics of the characters on Sesame Street and The Muppet Show?

As such, there’s a new film out which looks really good that will make everyone on Earth cry tears of emotional joy all down their face. Ladies and Non-Ladies, let us point you in the direction of the trailer for the splendid looking Being Elmo.

The Scissor Sisters To Write Songs For Fraggle Rock Film, Which They’ll Ruin

June 14th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Remember Fraggle Rock? Do you? Oooooh! Yes! There was… uh… Wembley. Red. The one in the dressing gown. Um. Those little fellas who had scaffolding made from sugar or something. And then there was the giant lummox with the allotment. And… er… Marjory the Trash Heap.

Oh, and if you watched it in the UK, there was that weirdo who lived in a lighthouse with his jaded canine.

What memories. What fuzzy, vague memories often brought about by the singing of the theme tune, especially when the lyrics were made dirty, swinging a Fraggle by its cock. Salad days. Salad days which could well be utterly ruined by the inclusion of the Scissor Sisters. What now?

The Muppets Trapped In A Museum Or Something Like That

August 26th, 2010 By Mof Gimmers

Even hard-hearted bastards like us can’t fail to be completely overjoyed at everything involving The Muppets. Even the rubbish films that came out in the ’90s bring a certain joy that no other selection of corpse-eyed cloth creatures with hands up their sphincters can match.

And so, it’s great to hear that The Muppets, notably the original Kermit the Frog puppet, has been donated to the Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History in Washington.

The muppet was donated by creator Jim Henson’s widow Jane, along with a bunch of other characters from the 1955 TV show Sam and Friends, a precursor to the famed Muppet Show.

Top Ten Sexiest Muppets

September 20th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

Have you heard the news? The Muppets are back in a big way, what with their Bohemian Rhapsody YouTube videos and new film and all.

And that’s great news.Why? Because the Muppets are probably the sexiest puppets in the whole world. Sexier than marionettes, that’s for sure. And easily sexier than shadow puppets. And, yes, even sexier than those full-size Japanese puppets that look like full-sized girls and have motorised genitals and giggle when you push a button on the back of their skull. God, the Muppets are SO SEXY.

Want proof? Good, you’ve come to the right place. Gentleman – and ladies, we don’t discriminate here – loosen your underwear and brace yourself for a list of 10 unbelievably sexy Muppets. Phwoar, etc…

WEBTHUMP! Thursday 12 February 2009

August 6th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

10 – Got four minutes? Like unfunny jokes told in an unfunny way? Then you’re going to love this…

9 – Animals on drugs – Cracked

8 – The Muppets: a history lesson – CNN

7 – A man gets needlessly worked up about how your carton of orange juice looks – Johnmamus

6 – We picked a David After Dentist parody at random. And here it is – YouTube

5 – A dreadful man releases a dreadful record – Popjustice

4 – Five ways that your mother can ruin your life – Regretfulmorning