As you know by now it is the dark corner of hecklerspray where all things B-movie and cult come to play, and we like nothing more than indulging in a little gore-hound love with some like-minded folk. If you are still reading then we’ll just go ahead and assume you are ‘down with the sickness’ as the soundtrack to Dawn Of The Dead said.

It’s probably a good time to let you know about a gem of a podcast we discovered on iTunes earlier in the week: Tales Of Horror. It is basically radio play-style horror stories including Salem’s Lot and The Black Museum with all the sound effects and style of something you might have heard on the wireless in the late 50s. All classic stuff and best of all it is free.

Back to business, and this week we are talking about Teen Wolf Too and Office Space.

A few weeks ago we watched Teen Wolf, and after that classic slice of furry eighties werewolf nostalgia we thought we should check out the sequel Teen Wolf Too (like ‘as well as’ – geddit?). Alarm bells always ring out loud when only a couple of minor characters return for a second outing and we probably should have paid attention to the warning.

Jason Bateman has taken the lead role from Michael J Fox as the teen wolf in question, with the story being basically the same – unpopular geek becomes da man once his hairy secret is out. Chicks dig him, dudes want to be him and he excels at all things academic and sporty – this time boxing takes over from basketball.

It was never going to as good as the original, but if we are being brutally honest this is a massive pile of monkey nuts. The make-up effects are not great and the whole movie has a pretty amateur feel to it. All in all, check it out for curiosity value alone – especially as both movies are out on a double DVD at a bargain price.

We are big time fans of Beavis & Butthead and King Of The Hill, so when we got our hands on Mike Judge’s live action comedy Office Space we nearly had an accident in our collective trousers.

If you ever wanted to see an example of what working in an office with row upon row of cubicles and middle management yes-men paper pushing, then this is the one for you. The story follows a guy who one day realises that he has had enough of it and wants to get one over on The Man so, with the help of a couple of other salary slaves, they hatch a plan to cream a bit off the top and leave the nine to five world.

We really enjoyed this movie. It provided us with endless quotes, brilliant characters and several laugh out loud moments. This is ideal to watch on a Sunday night when you are dreading going back to work and getting back on the good old corporate hamster wheel.

[story by Simon Woodley]

We love nothing more than watching forgotten gems, B-movies and blood & guts cult classics as well as the occasional new release that quenches our collective thirst for the occult, like the newly released Halloween as remade by Rob Zombie. Also this week: Death Wish…

Considering he has previously only directed two movies – House Of A Thousand Corpses and The Devil’s Rejects – Rob Zombie did a tip-top job of reimagining Halloween, a true horror milestone with a much needed expansion on the troubled past of the anti-hero Micheal Myers. We love the grimy quality of the movie and, of course, the classic rock ‘n roll soundtrack featuring Blue Oyster Cult which inspired a visit to iTunes.

We were particularly impressed with the way the young actor Daeg Faerch handled the mask-wearing nutter – torturing small animals, killing his family and descending into madness whilst in the Smith’s Grove Sanitarium with no-one in his life expect Dr Loomis (Malcom McDowell) and kindly Guard (Danny Trejo – You’ll know him when you see him). Years pass and the now massive and silent serial killer escapes and, wouldn’t you know it, come Halloween night, Michael has one thing on his mind and heads back to his old stomping ground to open a can of whoop ass.

In our humble opinion the ultimate night of terror would be to watch this new version of the film until Mikey does a runner, then pop in the John Carpenter original for the best possible version of the movie, but Mr. Zombie’s version does do the trick on its own. Perhaps we are just a little too geeky for our own good!

It is worth mentioning that if you fancy picking up the original Halloween you should try and track down the recently released Blu-Ray version as it features a good quality transfer and commentary from the director and leading lady Jamie Lee Curtis.

We have heard some rumours lately that the 1974 vigilante thriller Death Wish directed by Micheal ‘Calm Down Dear’ Winner is going to be remade soon featuring Sly Stallone in the lead role as made famous by Charles Bronson. What better time, then, to enjoy the original and groove along to the jazzy Herbie Hancock soundtrack and admire the kitsch 70s fashion and interior decoration. By the way, look out for a very young Jeff Goldblum, who looks about twelve, making a nuisance of himself at the supermarket.

The story is pretty straightforward, what would an everyman do if his family where killed by some street punks? The answer is just as straightforward – Chuck goes about grey and rainy New York city handing out some street justice with nothing but a sock full of coins and a revolver.

Out of the 20-year-life of the Death Wish franchise, this is the best movie and is far superior to the four sequels that followed. It easily qualifies as a forgotten gem, so get yourself a copy as soon as possible, or we’ll hunt you down and kill you.

[story by Simon Woodley]

This week we have been delving back to the 80s again with a couple of real classics. However, it is worth bringing your attention to some of the bargains we have seen in the high street that no self-respecting gorehound should be without – get yourself out and pick up the seminal Tim Burton / Michael Keaton classic Beetlejuice as well as the darkly funny The Man With Two Brains starring Steve Martin when he used to be funny, and don’t miss the surprisingly not terrible House Of Wax remake, all of which are under a fiver and ideal for a rainy bank holiday weekend.

We are very excited about the upcoming release of Lost Boys: The Tribe coming straight to DVD later this year and so decided to check out the original all the back from 1987 this week, along with Day Of The Dead…

The Lost Boys follows two brothers who move to the seaside with their slightly befuddled mum, only to discover things are not as idyllic as they appear. Yeah, you guessed it, there are vampires running around complete with new romantic leather jackets and backcombed mullets led by Kiefer Sutherland biting the locals and generally making a nuisance of themselves, and would you believe one of the new boys only goes and gets mixed with them with them!

There really isn’t anything wrong with this slice of 80s classic horror-light with legendary soundtrack. Crimes against fashion and an early coming together of The Two Coreys (Haim & Feldman) – the latter of which plays one of the now infamous Frog brothers, slays his fair share of the nightcrawlers and has the best line in “Death by stereo”.

It won’t come as much of a surprise that the movie was produced by one of the favourite Movies From Beyond Hollywood big guns, Richard Donner – who directed Superman, Superman 2: The Richard Donner Cut and the other big Corey movie The Goonies. We advise you to check out this as it has probably been years since you saw it last, and we dare you to try and not sing Cry Little Sister for weeks afterwards.

We were really impressed with the recent(ish) remake of Dawn Of The Dead and so when trailers for Day Of Dead started doing the rounds we were really wetting our pants with anticipation. Then it disappeared off the radar; there were stories of bad feedback on test screenings, re-shoots and script changes and it started to become a bit of a joke. There was no way it would be as good as the 1985 original but it might be a decent update, so when it finally escaped out on DVD last month we rushed to import it and immediately regretted trying so hard.

OK, so there are zombies and, yeah, they look the part. Yes, there is a decent body count and plenty of blood and guts and a bit of social commentary – but where is the heart ?

Like the undead this movie really just shuffles around without much point, dead eyes, a shadow, barely alive, if you will. Ving Rhames is trotted out to add a bit of star power and probably as a ploy to trick moviegoers into thinking it is a sequel to Zack Snyder’s superior Dawn Of The Dead from 2004. Be sure that it is not – there are some really cheap-looking CGI shots towards the end of the movie that looked rushed and done on a budget. All in all this was a huge disappointment and we recommend you avoid it like the plague and go back to the original, especially as it is now available on Blu-ray.

[story by Simon Woodley]

It is not often that we talk about new releases but this is well worth a mention, starring Josh Hartnett (Sin City) and produced by Mr. Evil Dead Sam Raimi, this is a really good adaptation of a graphic novel set in Alaska where they actually have a month of darkness – and who loves darkness more than vampires? No-one, that’s who, and these ones aren’t fruity crushed-velvet cloak-wearing ones. Remember what 28 Days Later did for zombies? Well this does it for vamps, making them super fast and strong as you like.

There are some pretty gut-wrenching scenes of violence and blood-play as well as a high level of blood and guts which always gets our vote.

We were really impressed with the crystal clear HD transfer and the whole perpetual darkness thing adds a real sense of atmosphere and of course hopelessness to the plight of the merry band of townsfolk struggling to survive until the sun comes up. By the way, if you thought Josh Harnett was a bit of a pretty boy who would be afraid to get his hands dirty, think again as he becomes an axe-wielding vampire slayer pretty easily.

Not that it is the most important thing in the world to us but the extras on the Blu-Ray disc are pretty good, and especially worth checking out are the comparisons between the original comic book and what eventually became the film. We’re pleased to say that is pretty true to the source material and adds to what is probably one of the first ‘must have’ discs of the year so far.

For a complete change of pace we also watched Shaolin Soccer last week. This movie almost defies explanation and can only really be seen to be believed, but in essence it’s a 2001 Chinese movie about a group of past it kung-fu masters and shaolin monks that use their skills to play football, with over the top wire fighting scenes and spontaneous dance routines mixed in for good measure.

It is pretty much a standard sports movie – can a ragtag bunch of losers make it to the big final and win the cup? We won’t spoil the ending for you but it might be a massive shocker.

There are a couple of versions of this movie knocking about but as usual we recommend the original subtitled Chinese version, as the US version was a little toned down, and this is the perfect introduction to high energy Asian movies and the work of director Stephen Chow which includes Kung Fu Hustle and the soon to be released CJ7.

[story by Simon Woodley]

For the initiated amongst you, this is the dark, damp corner of hecklerspray where we delve into the world of the B-movie, the cult favourites and the forgotten gems. We love it and so should you – if needed we can apply a Jedi mind trick to make you see things our way.

First of all, we feel it is our duty to mention One Missed Call – we ventured out to the local megaplex last night to check out the latest American remake of a J-horror scarefest. We left feeling robbed – it was bland, unoriginal and really came  across like a third-rate remake of The Ring.

This week: Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Teen Wolf!

Before it ever appeared on TV, Buffy The Vampire Slayer appeared in ’92 as a movie and, whilst it is hard to get hold of DVD, we recommend you give it a go. The story is that Buffy is the chosen one, the new slayer, although she is a typical 90s 90210 wannabe. Donald Sutherland (?) takes her under his wing and trains her to beat the dark dwellers six ways from Sunday with nothing but martial arts and wooden stakes.

Yeah, it looks a bit dated now -  but there are some brilliant lines like “Get out of facial,” plus it features Luke Perry who actually WAS in Beverly Hills 90210.

In our opinion it is miles better than the TV series that followed and well worth watching, although remember the crosses and garlic when you do.

Released just after one of the greatest 80s Michael J Fox movies, Back To The Future, came Teen Wolf – the movie that had the man himself struggling with the fact he was a teenage werewolf. See what they did there?

He was minding his own business doing all those wholesome teen activities like playing basketball, going to school and surfing on cars whilst listening to the Beach Boys when one day he grew hair where there wasn’t hair before and became instantly more cool and popular. If you are a fan of the slightly ridiculous then this is the one for you.

You can get the double feature DVD easily (it has the really poor sequel starring Jason Bateman on there as well) however, in our opinion you should get it just for the greatest movie mistake of all time. As the end credits role at the end of the big basketball game look over to the grandstand and see the guy in the Police Academy T-shirt doing his flies up! Classic!

[story by Simon Woodley]

Movies From Beyond is coming over the hill like a monster! Actually we went on holiday, it was a lovely house in a delightful place called Amytiville. We enjoyed it, shame about the flies and horrible mind-altering haunting and stuff.

This week: Air Guitar Nation and The Zombie Diaries…

We love to rock out with our cock out to Guitar Hero 3 on the Xbox 360 so we were well pleased to see that Air Guitar Nation was just released on DVD. 

The flick follows the American heats and the final of the Air Guitar world championships in Finland. Yeah we were surprised it was there too – but once you get over the fact that it isn’t a total pisstake it is one of the best documentaries we have seen for ages, and is genuinely funny in places. It's actually a bit inspiring that people can love something so much that they're willing to create an alter-ego, wear a customer and jump around on stage to Ace Of Spades by Motorhead.

Some of them are fantastically named with the two main players C-Diddy and Bjorn Turoque backed up by crazies like Krye Tuff and The Red Plectrum. All in all this movie showed that you can be good at pretty much anything and people will cheer you for it. The funniest thing to us was the ethos of the Air Guitar World Championship movement, which reckons it is a route to world peace – after all, if you are holding an air guitar you can’t pick up a gun !
 
We ventured out to the cinema earlier in the month and caught the outstanding Diary Of The Dead by the zombie master George Romero. It was a real return to form after the horrendous Land Of The Dead, and followed the start of an undead outbreak through camcorder footage made by film students. We highly recommend you see it as soon as possible – we did and it inspired us to dig up the DVD of The Zombie Diaries – a 2006 indie movie from good old blighty.

It is similarly made to Cloverfield and The Blair Witch Project with very shaky and patchy camcorders following three groups of survivors during the early stages of a zombie outbreak in a sort of anthology format. We really wanted this to be great, but unfortunately it misses that mark fairly badly, thanks to the way it is made (it is fairly frustrating to watch) and the fact that most of the characters were improved by being eaten by shuffling undead. The ending left us looking at each other with mouths open in confusion.

If you are a horror geek, this is one for you. If not ,then swerve it. By the way, watch out for Doctor Legg from EastEnders who pops up near the beginning.

[story by Simon Woodley] 

Right, back to business – this week we have a watched a couple of forgotten gems and we now present them for your approval; A Bucket Of Blood and Starship Troopers.

We love a good 50s black and white horror as you probably know by now, and one of the lesser-known classics is Roger Corman's A Bucket Of Blood from 1959. Picture the scene – a swinging bohemian coffee house with beardy poets, beatniks and artists. There is, of course, also the socially awkward loner, a good old-fashioned horror movie standby who just wants to fit in and and be noticed. After inadvertently killing his landlady's cat while trying to make a clay sculpture, the best thing to do is to make the corpse into his newest creation. Obviously the bohemians really dig it, forcing the newly-crowned king of the art world Walter Paisley to make more and more of his pieces.  

There is something really Hitchcock about this movie and it was actually filmed in only five days with a whopping $50,000 budget. If you are big into old-school horror then this is well worth checking out, however the 1995 remake starring Anthony Michael Hall from Weird Science is well worth avoiding.  

After he made the seminal Robocop Paul Verhoeven directed the fantastically OTT Starship Troopers, which pitted us puny humans against an invading force of super bugs. There are some really good comic book moments with bugs blowing up all over the shop and the brilliantly-named hotshot platoon leader Johnny Rico running headlong into the swarms of attacking parasites. There are some really moments of satire which is fairly standard in Verhoeven's films like Total Recall and Robocop.  

Considering this movie is more than a decade old the CGI is really good and looks strangely undated,  there is of course the infamous co-ed shower scene and there is just a little too much of a romantic love triangle subplot but all in this ranks high on the must-watch chart.

[story by Simon Woodley] 

If you have read it before, you know what it is all about. If you are one of those Johnny-Come-Lately types, this is the place on hecklerspray where B-movies, forgotten classics and all manner of blood, guts and exploration movies come to die – slowly and noisily, of course.

This week – Snoop Dogg's Hood Of Horror and Battle Royale…  

This week we have continued to reel from the amazing Cloverfield, and we've been wondering if we would ever see anything nearly as good. The answer is not quite, but we did catch the bizarrely yet enticingly-titled Snoop Dogg's Hood Of Horror. This is B-movie at its finest with an anthology of ‘Urban’ stories, much like Tales From The Crypt meets NWA. There are some truly bizarre casting moments here, including Billy Dee Williams (The Empire Strikes Back) and Ernie Hudson (Ghostbusters) as well as his royal pimpness Snoop Dogg playing a sort of narrator / hound of hell (hound like dog, geddit?).  

All three segments of the movie are nice and bloody with various ingenious ways of dispatching the cast, and we really got the feeling that nobody involved took it too seriously, especially in the last story Rapsody Askew. If you are into this type of movie you might want to also check out The Twilight Zone Movie having just come out on DVD after years and years, and also the new collector's edition of Creepshow.  

To change the pace a little we felt it only right to delve deep into the ‘Foreign Language’ section of our DVD collection and pull out 2000’s Battle Royale. This is one for the ages, as it tells the story of the what should happen to all those hoodies we see loitering around outside Tesco Express – put an exploding necklace on them, dump them on a deserted island with a lucky dip of weapons and let them kill each other. The winner is the last one standing.

Yeah, it has been done recently by Stone Cold Steve Austin in Condemned, but this is dark and grimy with a kill score update flashing up on the screen and some brilliant death sequences involving everything from a shotgun to a pan lid and a crazed ex-teacher as the demented MC. Some people are put off by having to read subtitles but come on, get some damn culture you heathen!

[story by Simon Woodley]

That’s right, run away you insignificant ants or end up flatter than a Shove Tuesday pancake under our massive squiddy feet. This week – Dawn Of The Dead and The Marine…  

This week we start with a mix of the old and the new, as we have just finished watching George A Romero’s classic zombie flick Zombi, also known as  the seminal Dawn Of The Dead, from 1978 on imported Blu-ray. There really is nothing wrong with this granddaddy of all horror movies – the picture is crisp, the soundtrack is crazy with a compilation of stock musical scores and cues and we found ourselves really rooting for the survivors holed up in the shopping mall, including Ken Foree, who later went on to play the dad in Kenan & Kel, weirdly enough.  

OK, so the zombies are a bit clunky compared to the recent remake and they seem to just stand there and get punched in the face, but that’s how zombies used to be and there are some moments that are more slapstick than survival horror.  Trivia fans note: there are five different cuts and versions of the movie, and the Blu-ray we watched was the 127-minute US theatrical version which is supposedly the definitive cut, although when you become obsessed with Dawn Of The Dead – and you will – we would recommend getting hold of the Ultimate Edition on DVD as it packs in the US theatrical cut, the extended version and the European versions.  

Do you remember when Jean-Claude Van Damme was in good old-fashioned ass kicking movies like AWOL, Kickboxer and Blood Sport and then sort of stopped doing them? Well, we can officially announce that he has been replaced by John Cena, former WWE champion and the new wooden-acting kid on the block. The story of The Marine is painfully simple; John Triton (Cena) and his missus are driving in the country and, lo and behind, she is kidnapped by some ne’er do well diamond thieves led by T100 himself Robert Patrick. Obviously that is a bad move as Johnny boy goes on a one-man-army rampage through the swamps beating the crap out of the baddies and blowing up stuff whilst looking rugged and sexy to get his bird back. Brilliant late 80s action that's a bit silly. Well, it was never going to be Schindler’s List was it?   

[story by Simon Woodley] 

As you may remember Movies From Beyond is an almost weekly trip to the dark side of movies, we love nothing more than laying on a beanbag eating Pringles watching something unsettling. This week: The Incredible Shrinking Man, Fido and Alice Cooper Live at Montreux…

We were flicking about on our Sky box the other day and happened across the fantastic 1957 classic The Incredible Shrinking Man. The story involved a guy who inadvertently gets enveloped by a radioactive cloud, which funnily enough leaves him looking like a body-glittered podium dancer. The outcome of the radioactivity is that he shrinks to only a couple of inches – there is something really nice about the shaky special effects and blue screen stuff. The second half of the movie revolves around the hero Scott Carey, played by Grant Williams, being trapped in the basement doing a pretty passable impression of Bear Grylls as he hunts for food, climbs stuff and battles a giant spider. Well it isn’t giant really but it is to him, you know what we mean.  

Probably one of the best Zombie movies we have seen for ages is the excellent Fido. If you have wondered what it would be like if the un-dead were domesticated and made into cleaners, this is the movie for you. This movie never really did massive business and sort of snuck out onto DVD, but watch out for Billy Connolly as Fido and Carrie Ann Moss from Matrix pops up as a slight pervy desperate housewife.  

As a special treat we fired up the HD-DVD and caught the fantastic Alice Cooper Live at Montreux. It was one of the first HD discs to be released and it is really great, pin-point picture and excellent sound as the man himself belts out some of his classics like Feed My Frankenstein, Billion Dollar Babies and the classic No More Mr. Nice Guy whilst strutting about on his all leather outfit and face paint. 

[story by Simon Woodley] 

You might call them B-movies, hidden gems, cult classics or the just plain odd, but if it involves zombies, blood, guts, slashers, deviants or all of the above then we are in. That’s how we roll, punk!

Today we're looking at nothing but remakes, in particular Dawn Of The Dead and Psycho…

Before he did the fantastic 300, Zack Synder took on a pretty steep challenge by remaking Dawn Of The Dead. It could have gone so horribly wrong, especially as generations of horror fans love the original so much, but there are some really great moments with the super-speedy undead tearing around the mall. The merry band of survivors, too, are really well cast with mostly unknowns; the main star of the gang being Sarah Polley, who has a definite ouch moment when she wipes out and smashes her head against the bath.

If you are a proper geek, the director’s commentary is well worth checking out, as is the soundtrack that features Johnny Cash and Richard Cheese. We watched the movie on the DVD that has been around for ages, although a HD-DVD release is also available.

If Dawn of the Dead ranks among the best remakes ever, which it does, then Gus Van Sant’s remake of Psycho must surely be the worst and probably the most pointless.  

Pretty much a shot-for-shot redoing of Alfred Hitchcock’s original, we really felt like there was no point to it all and the casting of Vince Vaughn as killer tranny nutcase Norman Bates is questionable as you are constantly expecting him to do something Wedding Crasher-ish. Never happens. We would advise horror fans to just watch the original, then Rear Window.

However, there is still the tension of the original Psycho, the voiceovers at the start and the infamous shower scene are still there but, having seen it in black and white so many times before, it was weird in glorious technicolour.  

In other news, the Resident Evil trilogy is just released on Blu-ray, which is very exciting as it is one of the better movies based on a videogame. Well worth checking out.   

[story by Simon Woodley]

Firstly though, we think it is our duty to let you know that the horrendously-under appreciated Zone Horror on Sky has started showing The Twilight Zone every night before Tales From The Crypt. Now that’s an evening in in anyone’s book (book of the dead maybe?)   

So onto this week's Movies From Beyond – The Omega Man and Ed Wood…

With all the hoo-ha surrounding Will Smith’s new cinema outing I Am Legend, we thought it was only right to check out one of the originals on HD-DVD: The Omega Man, starring gun-toting NRA spokesman / madman Charlton Heston. As with a lot of older movies that have been spruced  up for high definition releases, it looks pretty average – maybe we should have saved the extra fiver and just got the standard DVD release. The movie is really interesting, being the last man on the face of the earth is a fairly lonely experience; the signs of madness are done well and the nightly attacks from ‘The Family’ really help to ratchet the action up, all the while Chuck runs about in a tight-fitting leisure suit firing off machine guns and hearing payphones ringing. It suddenly occurred to us whilst watching The Omega Man that it has been parodied in an excellent Treehouse of Horrors episodes of The Simpsons, which sort of took the edge off a bit.  

Another big cinema release at the end of the month is Sweeney Todd with Keith Richards wannabe Johnny Depp, who also starred in a movie directed by Tim Burton (obviously) called Ed Wood about the king of the B-movie; Edward D Wood Jr. This is the man who brought us Plan 9 From Outer Space – believed by many to be the worst film ever made. We would have to disagree. The film follows Ed as he makes his way into filmmaking while dressing up in woman’s clothes, making his own special effects and striking up an unlikely friendship with Count Dracula himself; Bela Lugosi, who made his last ever appearance on film during Plan 9 From Outer Space.  

This is one of the best biopics around and once you see it you will want to dig out some of Ed’s other work like Night Of The Ghouls and Glen or Glenda. All in all this movie really honours a guy who's a bit of a legend around here.

[story by Simon Woodley] 

We have the lot – scary clowns like Tim Curry in It, a ringmaster that reminds us of Captain Spaulding from House Of 1,000 Corpses and, of course, Killer Clowns From Outer Space all wrapped up in a gaudy big top, so take your seats and enjoy the show.  

This week – Planet Terror and Vacancy…

This is the first Movies From Beyond of the new year so what better to talk about than probably the best B-movie of 2007? That'll be Planet Terror (also known as the other half of the Grindhouse project). This one is Robert Rodriguez’s effort and is, in our humble opinion, the stronger of the two – not least as you get the fantastic Machete faux trailer as part of the recently-released DVD. We are big zombie fans and this gore machine didn’t disappoint us with a strange bio-weapon infecting some soldiers, led by Bruce Willis, who then go on to eat and infect their way through small-town America. We particularly enjoyed the crazy Dr. Block and Quentin Tarantino as a pervy marine as well as the machinegun-legged go-go dancer Cherry. If you like over the top blood-splattered movies then this is the one for you.  

A slight change of pace was the slow burning Vacancy. We caught this on our shiny new Blu-Ray player so it was crystal clear – think Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho meets 8mm as Luke Wilson (Old School) and his missus check into a motel only to wind up special guest starring in a snuff movie. This was a really good watch as we do sometimes like our horror a little less obvious, and this worked well at gently turning the tension up on our heroes' attempt to escape.

Looking ahead to the new year there are some definite future classics we are wetting our pants over, especially JJ Abram’s Cloverfield. This has been viral-marketed to death but the story basically is as follows; a monster lays waste to New York. Sounds like Godzilla, but we love Godzilla so we'll troop to the cinema in February to see it. A gem of a zombie movie by the name of Fido is also out on DVD in the next couple of months. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have a pet Zombie? Well, wonder no more…

[story by Simon Woodley] 

If it was your thing, you could always fire up Emo-kid favourite The Nightmare Before Christmas directed by goth god Tim Burton or, for real frights, you could always just sit back and watch the Queen witter on for half an hour. Our tip is none of the above.

Instead, we'll be looking at Hooper and Death Proof…

Our first choice for this week is a definite forgotten gem; Hooper starring man’s man Burt Reynolds and directed by the same guy that did Smokey and The Bandit and The Cannonball Run. This seventies classic follows the exploits of a Hollywood stuntman and his mates as he jumps out of and over things and does that one last stunt; jumping a red Trans-Am over a 300ft canyon whilst shooting a movie starring Batman and Family Guy mayor himself, Adam West. It is all good stuff with the obligatory bar-fight, country music soundtrack and vehicular high jinks. We love nothing more than guilty pleasures and this is definitely one of them. What isn’t there to like?  

We are nothing if not consistent with our movie-watching and along the same stuntman theme is Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof starring a really old-looking Kurt Russell as serial killer, Stuntman Mike. It was part of the Grindhouse concept movie that tanked at the US box office earlier in the summer. Death Proof is finally out on DVD in January and is pretty much an uber B-move, plenty of snappy dialogue and over-the-top storytelling but it reminded us a little bit of someone trying to make an homage to QT, almost like he was trying too hard to be cool and shoehorn pop culture references in at every possible opportunity. It’s not bad but it’s not that good either and the attempts to make to film appear old and cheap actually get a bit annoying after a while. Our vote goes for the other volume of the project, Planet Terror.  

Merry Christmas movie geeks!

[story by Simon Woodley] 

Anyway, we've watched a lot of really ‘so bad it’s good’ car-crash movies in our time so it's only fair we share some of thoughts with the readers of  what could be the best entertainment site in the whole of the freakin’ internet. Ladies and gentlemen, it's the first Movies From Beyond, starring Flight of The Living Dead and Black Xmas…  

So, what do you get if you cross the recent daddy of all B-movies Snakes On A Plane with the mother of all zombie flicks Dawn Of The Dead? The answer is the fantastically bloodsoaked tongue-in-cheek Flight Of The Living Dead: Outbreak On A Plane. The setup is so simple – scientists are transporting a re-animating biological weapon/ corpse on a commercial 747 – that alarm bells should already be ringing. Inevitably one of the undead is freed after a spot of turbulence. And not the shuffling kind of Night Of Living Dead zombie, either – more the running, jumping and blood-lusting killing machines we have come to expect from 28 Days Later. It is pretty much paint by numbers stuff but really good nonetheless (who wouldn’t want to see a nun having her legs ripped off?)

As you would expect there are no real stars, but watch out for Kevin J. O'Connor of Van Helsing and Erick Avari from the fantastic Heroes TV show. When this movie made its festival debut in Montreal it was actually titled Plane Dead, as evident in some of the special features, and whilst it got some good reviews from the festival circuit it never actually got a cinematic release. Well, the best films never do, do they?  

Christmas round ours is a time to trim the tree, open the seasonal chocolate calendars (didn’t they used to be advent calendars?) and watch festive movies, and what better than Black Xmas – a remake of the 1974 slasher-tastic gorefest of the same name. This little gem pits a fraternity house of giggly girls against Billy, a killer that was abused in the house in years gone by.

Black Xmas is a bit of a Final Destination reunion, with Mary Elizabeth Winstead (3), Kristen Cloke (1), and Crystal Lowe (3), and there is something really funny about the way they are killed off one by one, especially with the killer's eyeball fetish leading to some fairly ‘icky’ moments, especially for anyone watching on HD-DVD – you'd hate to miss any of the ocular juice and blood. This is perfect to watch in the runup to the big day, as nothing says Merry Christmas like savage violence and forced incest. Enjoy!

[story by Simon Woodley]