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movie review

Movie Review: Monsters

by David Schwartz

It takes a special skill to turn a movie about 150 foot killer squids from space walking the Earth so bum-numbingly dull. But rookie director Gareth Edwards somehow manages it. It’s hard to believe it’s possible, but Monsters is quite simply a monstrous bore. Why? Because this is not a monster movie at all – [...]

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Film Review: Winter’s Bone

by Si Sharp

Early on in Winter’s Bone, the heroine Ree is asked by one of her two younger siblings for whom she is responsible whether she is going to beg their neighbour for some meat. She replies you should “never ask for what ought to be offered”, but where meat is offered easily, information is harder to [...]

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The Killer Inside Me – DVD Review

by James Morton

The Killer Inside Me, the latest genre excursion from filmmaker Michael Winterbottom, opens with a huge red herring. A jaunty, stylish credits sequence ushers the film in to the tune of Little Willie John’s version of ‘Fever’. ‘Fever”s a bit of an aural signpost. Putting it over the opening credits of a film is like [...]

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After.Life – DVD Review

by David Scarborough

Remember The Sixth Sense? That guessing game of creepy corpses, perceptive little children who don’t see the Sun enough and a plot twist that kept viewers guessing ‘til the closing credits. Now just imagine that but with Christina Ricci’s nipples. That was fun, wasn’t it? That’s the kind of Hollywood mindset that gets twisted tales [...]

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Lesbian Vampire Killers: Movie Review

by hecklerspray staff

A title sure to attract Goths, gore-hounds and repetitive strain injury victims across the country.

Lesbian Vampire Killers is a title is so audacious, so in your face, so silly, it should probably be less of a surprise that the film can’t live up to its promise.

Thrusting current ‘it’ boys from the vastly overrated Gavin and Stacey, Mathew Horne and James Corden play the two best buds Jimmy and Fletch. Jimmy (Horne, recently-dumped) and Fletch (Corden, craving adventure), decide to take a scenic camping trip to some generic creepy village. Problem is, it only features one house, a pub, an endless forest and obviously the aforementioned lesbian vampires.

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Movie Review: Donkey Punch

by hecklerspray staff

Oh no, no, no, no no no. NO. Four stars? Empire, Glamour and Arena hang your collective heads in shame. This film is Swiss cheese, potent fromage pure and simple.

That’s right, you guessed it, Donkey Punch is full of holes and it stinks.

For a start there’s the title. Has to be the worst name ever for a movie not involving a jazz soundtrack and nubile pleasure-seeking nymphets.

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MOVIE REVIEW: Juno

by hecklerspray staff

Juno shows us that even smart teenage girls get knocked up; it’s not just for tramps and tween queens. But this girl is no Jamie Lynn Spears.

Juno is a cute quirky tale about a wise cracking sixteen year old girl who gets herself impregnated by a boy she sort of likes. Luckily Juno is no role model for 13-year-olds the world over.

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