Buy Some Madonna Recordings That Are Possibly Worse Than Her Albums Good news if you're the kind of person who still likes Madonna! Somebody's now selling a 4" x 6" square of her skin stretched over a small wooden frame. We've heard there are several moles vaguely formed in the shape of the big dipper, and if you follow the image, navigationally speaking, you'll eventually wind up in the Americas. We've also heard it originally came detached in the teeth of a rabid goat seven hours into a Kabbalah desert-tent ceremony. That, or bunches of faxed love notes and boring telephone messages she delivered years ago are going up for auction.

‘Britney Spears 100% Not Pregnant’: Man Who Said She Was

The world may not care that much about Britney Spears as a singer any more, but so long as she's got ovaries constantly on the brink of inflating up another redneck infant and expelling it from her body, she'll never be without attention.

For example, the entire planet is currently frothing around like billyo over speculation that Britney Spears is pregnant with yet another child. But, as we all know, Britney Spears has emphatically refuted these claims as "B.S." So now the magazine that broke the Pregnant Britney Spears story in the first place has gone public with the text messages it claims are from the alleged father, admitting that the pregnancy is real. So what's the truth? Either Britney Spears is pregnant, Britney Spears isn't pregnant or there's a murky, alley-dwelling unlicensed abortionist knocking around somewhere who's sitting on an effing goldmine.