meryl streep - HecklerSpray

The Golden Globes were Racially Diverse and Anti-Trump

January 9th, 2017 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

So, the Golden Globes happened last night, and I always enjoy watching the Globes a bit more than the Oscars for a couple of reasons. First, there are television stars and movie stars together, not just one or the other. Second, and most important, all the celebrities seem to get drunk and this awards show, meaning it’s usually pretty laid back and amusing.

On last nights show, Eleven from Stranger Things rapped and Barb made her triumphant return. La La Land won a bunch of awards, a bunch of non-white people won awards, and Meryl Streep made a not so subtle dig at Donald Trump.

The Oscars Still Don’t Like Jennifer Aniston

January 15th, 2015 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Every so often, Jennifer Aniston will take a break from doing shitty romantic comedies and do some sort of indie movie where has to wear little to no make up and all her fans so “OMG, JENNIFER ANISTON IS FINALLY A SHOE IN TO GET AN OSCAR NOMINATION AND THAT WILL TOTALLY SHOW ANGELINA JOLIE!” This year, thanks to her movie “Cake” (which I know nothing about, but assume it has something to do with baking), her fans once again took on the role of believing that Jen was a sure shot for an Oscar, and once again they’ve been let down.

The Oscar nominations have been announced, and once again Jennifer Aniston was not nominated for Best Actress. But you know who was nominated for Best Actor? Steve Fucking Carrell! Michael Scott, himself. Go fucking figure!

Katie Holmes is Way Hotter and Less Crazy Since Leaving Tom Cruise

July 9th, 2014 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Katie Holmes is on the upcoming issue of Glamour magazine and she looks like an absolute fox. I mean, a real 10. And inside the magazine she gives an interview that, dare I say, doesn’t creep me out. Remember back when she was with Tom Cruise and she cut all her hair off and only gave interviews that sounded like she was whacked on Ativan and said “magical” in like every sentence?

Well, like Nicole Kidman before her, now free of Tom and Scientology, Katie has re-embraced the hot, stopped drinking the magic kool-aid so she sounds like a real person again, and is rebuilding her career. Hot bitches who are better off without Tom Cruise: 4*, Scientology: 0.

The 5 Best Moments from the 2014 Oscars

October 26th, 2014 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

So, the Oscars happened Sunday night and, I’ve got to say, it was a pretty great show. Ellen DeGeneres was an absolutely delightful host, there were some solid musical numbers, a bunch of beautiful people won acting Oscars and gave lovely speeches, Brad and Angelina were there, Gravity didn’t win Best Picture, so all in all it was a great night for me.

However, all these “nice” moments weren’t what made the show so great for me. Sure, I like a moving speech and Matthew McConaughey’s “Alright alright alright” as much as anyone, but it was these five moments, in no particular order, that made say “Yep, this Oscar show is special.”

Naomi Watts To Play Princess Diana: Royalists And Ring 2 Fans Unite In Grief

February 10th, 2012 By Sophie Hall

Right. Here’s the future.?In the year 200andGoogleitbecausewedidnot, once all the disinfectant from Leona Lewis’ Olympic Opening Ceremony Performance has sterilized Britain, there is to be some exciting news. Naomi Watts is going to do exactly what Meryl Streep has just done here in 2012.

But she’s going to do it slightly more creepier – and be all PRINCESS DIANA and everything.

Okay. Quick reminder on who Princess Diana is, just before everyone jumps on the bandwagon and starts holding aloft an ironic piece of bunting with a smashed arm of a princess on it or something.

Meryl Streep Thinks Everyone Hates Margaret Thatcher Because She’s A Woman, Rather Than A Ghoul

December 20th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Playing Margaret Thatcher must be great for an actress like Meryl Streep. Thesps just love it when they get the chance to play vile people from history. Murderers, rapists, sex offenders and the like give an actor the opportunity to feel brave and bold.

And ol’ Streepy knew too well that pretty much everyone on Earth hates Thatcher. This is something that made her ”more interested” in portraying the heartless witch in ‘The Iron Lady’.

And Meryl has some theories on why everyone despised her so much and… well… she’s off the mark really.

Meryl Streep Is Surprisingly Not Killed As She Appears In Manchester Dressed As Margaret Thatcher

December 2nd, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

The North of England hates Margaret Thatcher almost unreservedly. Seriously. Being a Tory in Ultra-Labourite Manchester is akin to being a leper. A leper who likes the music of James Blunt. A James Blunt loving leper in a Liverpool FC shirt.

And so, when Meryl Streep appeared randomly at Freya and Graham McAnally’s wedding at Manchester town hall, you’d have to assume only one thing…

…that locals gathered ’round Streep, figured she was the closest thing they’d get to seeing Thatcher in the flesh, and kicked her to death.

Meryl Streep To Bag Oscar For Margaret Thatcher Role (Brad Pitt To Play Norman Tebbit In 2014)

December 1st, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

The best way to win the respect of your acting peers is to go ugly. Monstrously ugly. For example, people fawn over those brave enough to play Hitler. Or a wife-beater. Or some kind of sex offender.

In the case of Meryl Streep, she’s being touted as a likely Oscar winner for her turn as Margaret Thatcher in The Iron Lady.

It takes nerve to play the biggest on-screen monster since Cloverfield.

Meryl Streep To Play Hilarious Old Margaret Thatcher

July 2nd, 2010 By Stuart Heritage

We’ll start with the bad news – there’s going to be a film about Margaret Thatcher. Want the mediocre news?

Meryl Streep might be playing Thatcher. And now for the amazing news – it’s being directed by Phyllida Lloyd. You know, the woman who directed Mamma Mia! This means that the film will almost certainly contain a sequence when, wracked with private guilt over the sinking of the Belgrano, Margaret Thatcher decides to cheer herself up by putting on a pair of dungarees and doing the splits while Nigel Lawson – played by Pierce Bronson – atonally grunts his way through an old disco tune.

This Margaret Thatcher film is going to be AWESOME. But only if it contains the exact sequence that we’ve just described.

Relax Everyone! There’s No Oscar Curse!

March 19th, 2010 By Josh Burt

Right, everyone needs to calm down. Get a nice sweet tea, run yourself a hot bath, sprinkle rose petals around the house. Allow your clothes to slide gently from your body, and dab sprinkles of baby oil onto your thighs. That's it.?Mmm, feel?the soft breeze leaping and dancing around your underpants.

Now?put on that Best of Alexander O?Neal compilation that was specifically designed to soothe you. And relax. Relaxed??Then?listen carefully – there isn't an Oscar curse. That's right. Shhhhh?

Yes, it's true that Sandra Bullock?s wholesome life partner MIGHT have spent a few long evenings smearing his podgy sausage hands all over a woman with tatts on her bosoms, but this could have been going on for AGES. Even during Sandra?s period in the desert when she was just another non-Oscar winner. A nobody.

As for the others ? Halle Berry, Reese Witherspoon, Julia Roberts, the one who was a boy in that film about being confused ? they were all probably just terrible wives.

Now wake the hell up, because here?s something really uplifting! It's a handful of beautiful thespians who still have husbands/lesbian partners, despite winning an Oscar! See? There's no hex! You're so SWEET with your silly craziness.