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Matt Dillon

Predators: that looks a decent film, doesn’t it? We’re all looking forward to watching the limp-wristed Adrian Brody holding a gun in an image akin to a Twiglit holding a cricket bat, right?

What you probably didn’t realise is that the unfortunately named Nimrod Antel has recently honed his directing chops on Armored, which hits DVD and Blu-ray this week.

It’s a pretty simple set-up, evoking several shades of Assault on Precinct 13 (even down to some similar music cues). It’s the Carpenter film that the old pro hasn’t been able to make since he slung together the atrocious Ghosts of Mars and then cashed in for his bus pass.

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You know the best thing about January 2? Nothing ever happens and we’re reduced to writing crap about idiots who nobody could ever care about.

But not this year! Oh no, this year is completely different – this year we’ve got some real news for you! And that news? Matt Dillon was caught driving his car a little bit faster than he should! And he got arrested! In VERMONT!

No, really, this is big news. Huge news. Matt Dillon is one of the most famous actors in the world and… oh wait, it’s not 1988 any more, is it? OK, carry on. Sorry.

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