Posts tagged as:

madonna

Diary of the Fearless Truth-Seekers: The Week In Tabloids – Beckham vs Evil

by Si Sharp

It’s been quiet for the tabloids this week. Things have gotten so bad, they’ve been forced into covering politics! Admittedly their coverage of the Labour leadership has been more like the video for Two Tribes by Frankie Goes to Hollywood, but with Liam and Noel Gallagher cast as the cold war leaders. There was such [...]

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Stephen Fry to Stretch Himself in New Sherlock Film by Playing Incredibly Intelligent Posh Bloke

by Si Sharp

Stephen Fry- author, presenter, actor, and Britain’s most popular choice of dinner party guest has confirmed that he is to play Mycroft Holmes, older brother to Sherlock in the planned sequel to last year’s surprise hit film. We say ‘surprise’ because the film’s director Guy Ritchie spectacularly wrong-footed everyone in 2009 by making a competent [...]

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Katy Perry To Become Chain-Smoking, Lager Drinking, Football Hooligan

by Ralph Sanders

I hate to come over all Daily Mail on your arse, but these bloody foreigners coming over here are a right pain. Taking advantage of our free healthcare, claiming our benefits, taking our jobs, providing wanking material for our teenagers, drinking our gin… Wait – what was that second to last one? No, there hasn’t [...]

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Sofia Vergara Thinks Madonna Is A Freak, World Nods In Agreement

by Limara Salt

Sofia Vergara is not a name many on this side of the pond are familiar with. Actually, most on the other side of the pond aren’t sure either but that hasn’t stopped her having a dig at a few of the walking wax figures around Hollywood. Vergara is known to most as the resident MILF [...]

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Madonna is Noise Pollution

by Mof Gimmers

You know those neighbours you have that like listening to music really loudly and singing along so badly that you find your ears curling in on themselves leaving you looking like a ’70s rugby player with root vegetable features? They sing and parp down the mic whilst throwing enough booze down their necks to kill George Best fifty times over?

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U2 are so rich that you might just puke

by Mof Gimmers

Tooth-sized phallus, Bono, is probably swimming in his room of coins right now while he waits for The Edge to finish making his 500 ft tribute to Barbara Cartland made out of diamonds, saffron and black printer ink.

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Official: Oprah Winfrey Can Kick Your Arse

by Ralph Sanders

Who’s the most dangerous celebrity? Which fiend of myth wields the most power? Cheryl Cole/Tweedy/Whatever? She’s only beaten up one toilet attendant, and that’s nothing for a Northern Girl, Cheryl Weedy more like. Russell Crowe? Well, there’s his terrible band with the terrible name and he can throw a mean phone, but that’s nothing new. [...]

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Kylie Is Back, And Inexplicably Into Kabbalah Now

by Stuart Heritage

The important thing to remember about Kabbalah is that Ashton Kutcher thought it was stupid. Ashton Kutcher.

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Some Mug Turns Over Guy Ritchie’s Gaff

by Stuart Heritage

It’s a brave man who’d try and burgle Guy Ritchie. Don’t they know he’s an expert kung-fu practitioner?

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Kim Kardashian Wants Your Son

by Steve Charnock

Us cool dudes at hecklerspray aren’t perfect. In a bid to be totally sick and wicked and bad and whatever for you kids, we sometimes make mistakes, speak out of line or go a bit too near the knuckle. The trouble is, and we’ll use a metaphor that you young people might understand, we’re constantly [...]

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