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Lisa

Visit a branch of Weatherspooons on a weekend and you’ll no doubt bump into a decaying mess on the dance floor that’s tried to cover their appearance by plastering on the makeup. Everybody loves to witness a female attempt to look young as they prance around in their daughter’s top that shows off every ravage of age.

Basically, some people in life should accept that their sell by date has arrived and just stop. Sadly, this doesn’t happen and the same can be said about long running animation, The Simpsons. Reaching its peak in the mid nineties, the show has continued to lag in quality and started to become awkward and confusing.

But The Simpsons broadcaster has faith and continues to recommission the programme. Americans either have an alternative view take on humour, or Fox like the money from the merchandise. Either way, The Simpsons has reached a landmark 500th episode.

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Big Brother, Bea, Siavash, Charlie, LisaOn Friday, Bea got evicted from the Big Brother house, which isn’t really news because Bea was rubbish.

So what other Big Brother news is there? Well, Big Brother is going for starters, and we’ve decided to take that fact as something between a depressing critique on the state of the nation and a direct personal insult. What else? Nothing. Nothing has happened on Big Brother, in the last few days or ever, frankly.

Nevertheless, here are the Big Brother housemates who’ve caught our eye this week – Siavash, Charlie and Lisa

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Big Brother, Freddie, Halfwit, Marcus, Bea, Lisa, DavidOn Friday’s Big Brother, the impossible happened – the previously invincible Freddie was evicted.

Why? We have two theories. The first is that Marcus is a stronger competitor and the public identifies with him more readily. The second is that everyone saw Freddie scream and wail and convulse last week because Bea moved 10 feet away from him and realised that he was a monumental tosspiece.

Anyway, here are the Big Brother competitors who’ve caught our eye this week – Bea, Lisa and David

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Big Brother, Big Brother nominations, Bea, Lisa, HiraThis is just a wild punt, but we’re guessing that tomorrow’s Big Brother eviction is going to be the most exciting of the series so far.

Why? Because everybody is up for eviction. The viewers finally have the chance to vote out the Big Brother housemate who annoys them the most, regardless of who’s been nominated. Well, actually that’s not strictly true – what’s actually going to happen is that the viewers have to vote to save their favourite housemate, which means that tomorrow’s evictee will be the housemate who people care the least about. Which, in our case, is everyone.

Let’s look at the three Big Brother housemates who we think are most likely to get booted out tomorrow – Hira, Lisa and Bea

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Big Brother, Big Brother housemates, Angel, Krogface, Lisa, NoirinPoor old Angel. Just a few weeks into Big Brother and already she’s been evicted. How sad.

Whatever will Angel do with her life now? Apart, you know, from her professional boxing, professional singing, professional tattoo-artisting, fashion design, fitness coaching and all-round looking a bit like a man? We literally have no idea. That poor girl’s all at sea. We’d worry about her, but we’ll have forgotten what her name is by Wednesday so it hardly seems worth it.

Anyway, now that Angel’s gone, here’s who’s been catching our eye in the Big Brother house this week…

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17352a34709bdb64000489350b258358_extraBig Brother started on Thursday night, right? Wrong.

In actually fact, if you want to be bewilderingly petty about it, Big Brother only started last night. Because last night, the final housemates were given official housemate status. True, that meant saying goodbye to Beinazir, but we’re sure she’ll go on to have a bright future. Those Subway signs don’t hold themselves up, you know.

So now we know who the final Big Brother housemates are, the ‘fun’ starts here. Let’s take a look at the Big Brother housemates who’ve caught our eye so far…

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snn05tvspd-04_06_2009-163921-sun-email_bb10_groupFirst the facts. This is Big Brother’s tenth anniversary, and the fifth anniversary of us writing about it. We don’t know which is worse.

Nevertheless, the new series of Big Brother kicked off last night, which means that from now until let’s say the end of actual time itself, we’re going to have to watch hour after of hour of preening turdbaskets discussing nothing using a subnormal vocabulary. And we’ll be with you every ghastly step of the way.

But first we should probably introduce ourselves to the newest batch of Big Brother housemates, shouldn’t we? Fair enough, then…

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We’re into the last week of Big Brother 2008, and we have to say it’s gone a lot quicker than we thought it would – these last 89 days have only felt like a hundred years, which is better than usual.

But before we look forward to the end of Big Brother, what’s been going on? Well for starters Lisa was evicted from Big Brother on Friday, and took the exit interview as another opportunity to try and convince us that a large part of her brain doesn’t work properly. Oh, and also there’s going to be a double eviction tomorrow night – the two housemates with the least number of votes so far are being booted out.That’s right – people still actually vote on the outcome of Big Brother. Losers.

But who’s going to win Big Brother on Friday? Mohamed? Is it Mohamed? Is it? Here are the Big Brother betting odds for Mohamed to win, with help from Paddy Power

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Big Brother Betting Odds: Lisa Out Tonight?

by Stuart Heritage

What’s happened on Big Brother since the great big public nomination/money quiz of Wednesday night? Nothing, that’s what.

Phew. We don’t know about you, but this whole ‘stuff actually happening on Big Brother’ malarkey freaked us out. For a second there we thought Big Brother was going to do stuff every single day instead of occasionally punctuate 80 days of morbid tedium with a sloppily thought-out gameshow containing approximately zero tension. Thanks Big Brother. Don’t go changing.

But anyway – it’s Lisa and Sara up for eviction this week, and we looked at Sara’s chances yesterday, so here are the Big Brother betting odds for Lisa’s eviction, with help from Paddy Power…

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Big Brother: Sara & Lisa Up, Both Quite Rich Now

by Stuart Heritage

Well it took 84 days, but Big Brother finally got exciting last night. Well, maybe exciting isn’t the word. Something happened on Big Brother last night. Does that count?

In what has to be a nudge to the British public to remind everyone that it still existed, last night Big Brother made the remaining housemates nominate each other face to face on live TV. Then Sara and Lisa – the two housemates with the most votes – had some sort of convoluted quiz thing to go through before one of them won £50,000. They’re still up, though. Are you still with us? Sara and Lisa are still up for Big Brother eviction tomorrow. That’s the important part. Well, maybe important isn’t the word…

So who’ll go tomorrow? Here are the Big Brother betting odds for Sara’s eviction tomorrow, with help from Paddy Power…

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