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Laura White

4 More Terrible X Factor Decisions Revealed!

by Josh Burt on November 13, 2009 5 Comments

simonOh yeah, everyone’s gone crazy bananas ever since Simon Cowell allowed the public to cast Lucie Jones back to her dreary Welsh village, where she can forever plat people’s hair, and regale them with tales about the time she wore razor-cut denim, and sung a song that no one had ever heard of.

“I’m sorry, but who the hell are you?” they will ask. “I’m Lucie Jones,” she will declare, standing up from her seat, imagining the warmth of a spotlight once again caressing her stupid Welsh face. “Lucie Jones, the lonely girl from Wales, who went on to national fame and stardom… for about a month.” She’ll then either start frenziedly hacking at her own arms, or take up board and lodgings in whichever dumpster Shane Ward and Leon Jackson have now decided to call home.

The point being that it doesn’t matter one jot that Cowell saved those turdish Irish twins at the weekend. Like the rest of them, fast forward a few months, and they will be touching themselves for coins in some rancid little corner of the internet. This is an early-evening variety show – Leona Lewis and JLS aside, it doesn’t produce actual stars. So everyone should just shut up.

Plus it’s not the first time that the important X Factor judges/general public have cocked things up anyway. Read on, and we’ll tell you some more… Read More >>>

X Factor Reject Laura White Gets A Record Deal. Everything Goes Back To Normal.

by Matthew Laidlow on November 13, 2008 2 Comments

In what felt like week 36 of this year’s X Factor, the first semi-exciting incident occurred last Saturday night.

And, amazingly, it wasn’t Dannii Minogue pulling a facial expression other than that of a rabbit before it gets squashed by a car or the camera crew not zooming in Holly Willoughby‘s boobies

Instead it was the shock departure of Laura White, one of the favourites to win X Factor. Laura White was the fifth person to be booted off, after the public deemed her rubbisher than everyone else. Even that Daniel bloke who sounds at best like he should belong in the working men’s club circuit did better then her. Naturally, fans of the show with too much time on their hands set up Facebook campaigns to get her reinstated. This has technically worked, because now someone’s given her a record deal.

Read More >>>

In what felt like week 36 of this year's X Factor, the first semi-exciting incident occurred last Saturday night. And, amazingly, it wasn’t Dannii Minogue pulling a facial expression other than that of a rabbit before it gets squashed by a car or the camera crew not zooming in Holly Willoughby's boobies Instead it was the shock departure of Laura White, one of the favourites to win X Factor. Laura White was the fifth person to be booted off, after the public deemed her rubbisher than everyone else. Even that Daniel bloke who sounds at best like he should belong in the working men’s club circuit did better then her. Naturally, fans of the show with too much time on their hands set up Facebook campaigns to get her reinstated. This has technically worked, because now someone's given her a record deal.