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Oh SpongeBob SquarePants! You lovable oaf you! You’re like a diet Ren & Stimpy and we can’t knock you for it. You’re a delightfully odd chap and have delightfully odd chums.
However.
Things have taken a turn for the worse for SpongeBob as it transpires via various reports that he’s been arrested outside Grauman’s Chinese Theatre in Hollywood! And we’ve got the photographic evidence! And it’s not us doing some dodgy photoshopping either.
Block parties. They sound fun don’t they? Well, thousands agreed when someone on Twitter invited everyone along to have a real cool time. However, the internet isn’t very good at organising things and guess what? A riot ensued. Great stuff.
The mixture of an overcrowded theater and an invitation to a block party ended with everything going a bit awry around Hollywood Boulevard outside a film premiere, which saw the police turning up in full riot gear. The LAPD are a notoriously in favour of soft-policing aren’t they? *coughs*
This saw revellers lobbing bottles and vandalising cars while everyone else refused to politely go home. The sun was out! They were having a nice time! And Grauman’s Chinese Theatre wept as it only wanted to show a documentary about an electronic music festival.
So this chap called Shifty Shellshock, who has recently been whoring himself on reality TV and and is in a band called Crazy Town, was picked up by the LAPD for knocking his ‘lady’ about.
He denies it and who are we to argue? He told an interviewer that he didn’t
do domestic violence
and that the cops were there because his girlfriend was
being too loud.
There's a chance that the Hollywood home of actress Charlize Theron has been burgled, possibly, at some point, we think.
Vague, we know, but it's as concrete as it gets. According to the LAPD, Charlize Theron's home was broken into at some point between last Thursday and Saturday, but nobody seems to know what was taken, if anything. Still, we're sure Charlize Theron will use her natural resourcefulness to turn this possible almost-burglary into something positive. Maybe Charlize will dramatise her supposed vaguely-timed not-quite burglary and turn it into a movie. She might even win an Oscar for it, too, so long as she promises to not wear any make-up and scowl a bit in the trailer.
