What is Kevin Costner famous for? Well, he sang I Will Always Love You and said “back, and to the left” for five hours straight in JFK and… uh… he was in the terrible Waterworld. And that’s about it.
And now, getting the chance to redeem himself from such atrocities, he now being lamer than a horse sanctuary, wimping out of Quentin Tarantino’s ‘Django Unchained’.
Thank god we’ve got Kurt Russell – a real man – to take his place. Whaddaguy!
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To celebrate the upcoming release of his new film ‘The Ward’*, hecklerspray would like to remind everyone of why John Carpenter is, on a good day, one of the greats. Liking John Carpenter is like being an Oasis fan- you still hope that the next release will capture those defining moments that made him/them so vital to you despite the fact that you’ve been hurt so many times.
If you can’t understand why we sound like an abused wife, then you obviously haven’t seen Ghosts of Mars.
Here is a list of films, underneath each title there’s an explanation of why you have to see it. You’ve read magazines so you know how these lazy articles work- either you already like the films and you enjoy reading someone agree with you or you haven’t seen them, in which case you have no interest in reading any of this. Read More >>>
They may be able to talk the talk – but can they really walk the walk?
Hollywood movies are littered with so-called tough guys. But take away their stunt doubles, green screens and fake guns and what do you have left? Nic Cage? He’s just a lanky streak of piss. Mel Gibson? Give me a break. Mark Wahlberg? Don’t make us laugh. Tom Cruise? Now you really are taking the piss.
Well, hecklerspray has come up with a list of Hollywood actors we think really could mix it with the best of them. These are Hollywood hardmen who really did live up to the name.
Enjoy! And if you have a problem with our choices, we’ll be waiting outside…
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