Kourtney Kardashian Baby

Groan of the Week: Another Kardashian is En Route

June 4th, 2014 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

thefam

One of these days, I’ll stop solely writing about the Kardashians; however, today is not that day. I’m absolutely thrilled to announce (imagine me saying that in a monotone, indifferent voice) that Kourtney Kardashian (the one who posts the least amount of selfies on Instagram) and her long time bf, Scott Disick (the dude “American Psycho” is based on, right?) are having their THIRD baby.

To the surprise of no one, I keep up with “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” and, as far as I can tell, Kourtney only ever has sex with Scott anymore if she thinks it will lead to a baby (probably why Scott is such an angry alcoholic. What’s the point of dating a Kardashian if you’re not fucking them?). So I guess Scott decided that if having a kid would break his two year dry spell, he was into it.

Kourtney Kardashian is Mad at Being Photoshopped Skinny, Dammit

January 26th, 2010 By Amy Grindhouse

Kourtney Kardashian is probably headed for a libel-related lawsuit, with the Photoshop happy people at OK! magazine.

The reality star is accusing the publication of letting loose the airbrushing equivalent of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, all over her boat race.

Kourtney has been having a weeks-long love affair with the good folks at Life & Style magazine. For those of you who haven’t heard of them before, they would be the celebrity baby-crazies who aren’t People magazine.

Kourtney Kardashian Has A Baby, So Whoopy Doo For That

December 15th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Oh for God’s sake, Kourtney Kardashian. You’ve spoilt it. For generations, all Karadshian children have been given K names.

Kim, Kourtney, Khloe, Kris, Kendall. That’s how it works. They all have K names. It doesn’t matter if, like Kourtney or Khloe, you give them a C name and just change the first letter to K. It doesn’t even matter if, like Kendall, you name them after a cake instead of a person. It has to be a K name. Understand? It has to be a K name.

So what did you decide to call your new-born baby boy, Kourtney Kardashian? That’s right – you decided to call him Mason Dash Disick. That’s not a K name! The only K in there is the one at the end of his surname, and that doesn’t count! You’ve ruined it! We hate you, Kourtney Karadshian! WE HATE YOU!