Kelly Osbourne - HecklerSpray

The 10 Most Surprising Celebrity Virginity Stories

October 26th, 2014 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Celebrities: they’re (sometimes) just like us! And just like you and me, they all have to lose their virginity, even Taylor Swift (even if it is to a stuffed Care Bear). In a US study, it said the average age boys lose their virginity is 16 and the average age for girls is 17, but that doesn’t mean we all meet the average. Hell, some of us aren’t even close!

As someone who is weirdly obsessed with celebrity sex (I have no shame in admitting this), I basically know when and how every famous bitch in Hollywood has lost their V-card, and I’ve decided to share some of the more surprising “first time” stories with you, because we all know I’m not the only one who loves this shit!

Fergie’s Baby Shower Sounds Like Fabulous Drunken Fun

August 1st, 2013 By Rhiannon Davies

Slugs, snails, puppy dog’s tails, and burlesque stars in drag. That’s what the baby shower for Fergie’s impending bundle of joy was made from.?

The singer dubbed it her ‘gayby’ shower, which immediately takes pride of place next to ‘chillax’ and ‘crunk’ as hybrid words that should never be uttered by any sane person, ever. Apart from the questionable name, it looked pretty damn fun for a party dedicated to something as boring as a baby.

Kelly Osbourne Cries About Death Threats From Lady Gaga’s ‘Freaks’

May 29th, 2013 By Rhiannon Davies

This week on ‘Feuds You Didn’t Know Were Happening’, Kelly Osbourne calls out Lady Gaga for being a ‘great big hypocrite’.?

Kelly covers the latest issue of Cosmo – which by now has surely run out of ways to say they feature sex tips – and has decided to drag up a feud that everybody else lost interest in a long time ago. Presumably, this is because the ‘career’ section of the interview didn’t last very long, and Kelly’s been skinny too long for it to actually be a note-worthy story anymore.?

The Most Ridiculous Celebrity Santas Ever

March 23rd, 2013 By Chris Starr

We are but DAYS away from St. Nick sliding his way down your chimney (have you ever thought that actually, what Santa does is breaking and entering?) and like everyone else, celebrities are of course willing to dress up and impersonate the great man himself for your delectation.

But why would you want to do that? It seems strange that celebrities are willing to crush the dreams of children everywhere by saying that actually, Santa isn’t necessarily some fat dude at the North Pole. He can also be Katy Perry stretching her gamine limbs on stage at the Jingle Ball.

Lady Gaga is Actually Pregnant, Gets Morning Sickness on Stage

October 8th, 2012 By Chris Starr

You’re on the Edge of Glory. You are Lady Gaga, the world’s most fascinating person. (We’ll ignore the millions of people who are getting sick of her childish oneupmanship and really just want her to go away and live in a hovel for a bit.) You’re in Barcelona, and you’re performing to an adoring audience of thousands.

You may be up the duff, too. Why else would Lady Gaga start walking down stairs on stage, stop, and upchuck her dinner? That’s right: you heard it here. I’m calling it: Gaga is preggo.

Kelly Osbourne Gets Death Threats From GaGa’s Little Monsters

February 20th, 2012 By Robin Darke

What did you do this weekend? Have a slow meander into town to revel at how low humanity has sunk, judging the entire human race by how many overweight teenage girls girls a) have stupid thick rimmed glasses with no lenses or b) wear pink hoodies with the precise date of when they got a DM over Twitter from Justin Bieber (or whoever is running his account while he’s giving Selena Gomez some southern loving and looking at himself in the mirror) there are?

Or maybe you spent the entire weekend watching Whitney Houston’s funeral off your face on MDMA, convinced that members of the choir looked like extras from Sister Act? Well either way, you’ve probably had a better time than Kelly Osbourne who’s had to face off attacks from the newest nation soon to join the United Nations; Lady Gaga’s Little Monsters.

And it all stems from people not knowing how to deal with someone else’s opinion. Which seems to be a recurring theme in the busy life of Kelly Osbourne doesn’t it? After all, doesn’t God say “Let she that used to go out with a transvestite lover, cast aspersions that Christina Aguilera is a fat bitch.” [excerpt from the MTV Almost Right, Thanks For Trying Bible].

Cyberbullying With Miley Cyrus, Kelly Osbourne and Khloe Kardashian

December 15th, 2011 By Kris Silver

The internet can be a dark and cruel place full of cyber bullies hiding behind anonymous usernames and bastards like us, who are rewarded by the mainstream media for having blogs dedicated to slagging off celebrities.

Ha!

In fact, the internet is such a vile cesspool of hate that the stars have come out and whinged about how they're being made fun of too much and it hurts their feelings and that people should care about their pointless little lives and treat them as humans and not the dancing monkeys they actually are.

Miley Cyrus Is A Great Big Dirty Stoner

November 28th, 2011 By Joanna Bolouri

Teenage warbler and spawn of the devil (aka Billy Ray) Miley Cyrus, ?recently ‘fessed up to being the raging pothead we all suspected at her 19th birthday party in Los Angeles.

Guest included, Kelly Osbourne and Rumer Willis, boyfriend Liam Hemsworth and of course her parents who were probably out the back, line-dancing through the piles of money they’ve ?made from selling their child to the Disney factory.

Miley was presented with a Bob Marley cake and before devouring it face first, she gave a small speech, made up of words.

Kelly Osbourne Has A Dig At Ex Via Twitter With Her Massively Loud Mouth

July 28th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Say what you like about Kelly Osbourne, but… no, seriously. Say whatever you like. We’re not Kelly Osbourne so we’re not going to defend her. That’s because she’s rather fond of doing it for herself.

See, Kelly has had a privileged but awkward upbringing, and so, as some coping mechanism, developed a really loud mouth.

If you go after her, she’ll probably huff and puff and yell your house down. So, when an ex of hers starts slating her on twitter, she’s not likely to take it lying down is she? Especially when she’s still grieving over the loss of her friend, Amy Winehouse.

World Goes Into Mourning After Kelly Osbourne’s Stupid Dog Dies

June 16th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Dog owners are idiots. They dote on their flea-bitten shit-factories like they’re proper members of the family, despite the fact they do no work around the house, demand food and walkies and are only good for blaming your flatulence on.

Not that dog owners would ever let on. They look into their idiot dog’s eyes and mistake stupidity for some kind of human empathy. ‘My dog understands me and is always there when I need them!’ Dogs are always there, period. They’re after food or a piss, not a heart-to-heart. Dogs probably don’t even have hearts. Just more shit.

Of course, the rest of us perfectly sensible humans have to put up with people when their dogs die. We suffered like Jesus on the cross when Jennifer Aniston’s dog passed-away, and now, we are required to do the same for Kelly Osbourne who has lost the only thing in her life that she felt was an intellectual equal.