Posts tagged as:

katy perry

‘Sayonara Russell Brand’ Say Japanese Deportation Folks

by Mof Gimmers

Russell Brand – essentially James Blunt in a long, thick, acrylic wig – has been kicked out of Japan, meaning that his stay in the East was roughly 3 seconds long. In that time, it is assumed that he told roughly 2 jokes and mugged to an imaginary camera 54,900 times. That’s right. Japanese authorities [...]

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Katy Perry Offers Jessie J Career Advice, Which Hopefully Includes Hint To Stop Singing Altogether

by Mof Gimmers

Jessie J went from being ‘quite promising’ to ‘gigantic irritant’ almost overnight. There’s something incredibly cold and desperate about her (and not in a fun way). She’s started to enjoy the smell of her own farts while everyone else is dry heaving in the vicinity. Of course, it ain’t easy being a new pop star. [...]

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DECODED: Katy Perry Goes Alien In ET Video

by Mof Gimmers

Oooh! Look! Another video has premiered on the internet! And it looks expensive too! In the age of rampant illegal downloading, how on Earth can these poor record companies afford to spend so much on a promotional video of a song no-one will end up buying?! Probably something to do with the fact that people [...]

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Calvin Harris Tries To Have A Fight With Katy Perry Online And Fails

by Mof Gimmers

Katy Perry and Calvin Harris have started having a massive spat on twitter after the tallest Scottish musician who has ever lived decided to cancel some shows with her at the last minute. Something of a godsend for everyone concerned really. Of course, Harris taking on Perry is hilarious in itself. Some two-bit teeny-raver tackling [...]

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Adele Set To Become This Generation’s Bryan Adams

by Matthew Laidlow

When people first started mentioning Adele, we thought she was a South American footballer who was destined to sign for a club with more money than sense. To the best of our drunken recollection, most people with one name have amazing ball control and dribbling technique. Sadly, it turns out that Adele isn’t someone from [...]

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Katy Perry’s Mother Desperately Wants Her Daughter To Have Sex Without A Condom On

by Mof Gimmers

Hey! Remember when dithering Christian, Katy Perry’s Mum (that’s her real name) had a massive cry in public about her daughter’s music? No, she didn’t think it was bad per se, rather, she didn’t like the whole ‘I Kissed A Girl’ message. Because, she reckons, that sort of thing make you end up in a [...]

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Adele Really Doesn’t Want To Be As Famous As Lady GaGa, Which Is Fortunate

by Mof Gimmers

The original headline for this story was going to be: Adele In Fear Of Becoming As Famous As Lady GaGa Despite Incredible Unlikelihood That She’ll Ever Be As Famous As Lady GaGa, Fear. However, that’s long-winded and not funny. However, Adele really doesn’t want to be as famous as GaGa, which is incredibly fortunate for [...]

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Russell Brand, Katy Perry, Kama Sutra And A Collective Puking

by Mof Gimmers

Russell Brand not only has the weirdest facial hair in showbusiness (because it looks like its made from iron filings), but he’s also got the kookiest marriage in the universe after hitching it up with Katy Perry. It’s rumoured that the pair plan to spend the rest of their lives together saying “What are we [...]

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Russell Brand Marries Katy Perry – The Massive Pair of Idiots

by Paul Pencott

In the most infuriating manner possible, the two deeply-unlikeable cartoon cretins wed on Saturday in what we can only assume to be the biggest theatre of wide-eyed “ooh did we just say/do something a bit ‘outre’ did we?” the world has ever seen. When not staring at the nearest available camera in a faux-innocent manner [...]

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WEBTHUMP! 20 October 2010

by Mof Gimmers

10. The Vatican declare that alcoholic, obese, simpleton Homer Simpson is a ‘true Catholic’ – Telegraph 9. A cat in a stupid outfit eats a banana in a really noisy and disgusting way. You’ll still go “AWWW!” 8. Do you like sneering at people with rubbish clothes on? – PoorlyDressedPeopleOfTheWorld 10. The Vatican declare that [...]

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