All good things come to an end – and all crap things that star a couple of awful bellends come to an end, too.
Yes, we mean Jon & Kate Plus 8. Apparently TLC has decided to ditch Jon & Kate Plus 8 in both its current and proposed Kate Plus 8 guises. So goodbye Jon and Kate Gosselin, you were one of a kind. You’ll always be remembered as the fame-hungry couple dreadful enough to unblinkingly gamble away the well-being of your own children for a few moments of fleeting celebrity. Nobody could ever take your place.
Except for the Balloon Boy family, obviously. Someone give them a reality show, pronto.
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During Jon & Kate Plus 8, Jon Gosselin was mainly characterised by his giant, flaccid lack of ambition.
But now he’s a new man! Jon Gosselin is no longer content to stand in Kate Gosselin‘s shadow! If it kills him, he’s going to make the world sit up and realise that – rather than being the passive, testicle-faced non-entity that everyone thought he was – he’s easily as much of an overbearing turdbasket as his estranged wife.
And if that means secretly withdrawing over $200,000 from his joint account, leaving his family with just $1,000, then that’s precisely what Jon Gosselin will do. So he’s done it.
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Advance warning: you probably won’t side with anyone in this story because, well, it’s about Jon Gosselin.
And his awful wife. And his awful show. You see, earlier this week Jon Gosselin was effectively fired from his TV show Jon & Kate Plus 8, which would continue without him as Kate Plus 8. Except now Jon Gosselin has decided that if he can’t be part of Jon & Kate Plus 8 then nobody can, so he’s banned the crew from filming his kids.
Oh, and he spelt his own name incorrectly on the sign informing the crew of this. He’s a catch, that one.
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Jon Gosselin, this is your lucky day! From November 2, TLC will be removing you from Jon & Kate Plus 8 forever!
You got your wish! From November, Jon & Kate Plus 8 will be renamed Kate Plus 8 and you’ll be scrubbed from history forever. This is exactly what you wanted! No more cameras following you around all the time. No more media intrusion. No more European yacht parties. No more disproportionately sexy young girls who’ll have sex with you just because you’re on TV.
Oh Jon Gosselin, we envy you. Or we can’t wait for you to disappear from our lives forever. One or the other.
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