by Shawn Lindseth
Does anybody else remember when Kate Hudson’s hair was nominated for an Oscar back in 2001.
There’s reason for that you know. It’s been enrolled in acting classes since the age of four. It’s done stage work since the age of 12, and sometime in the sixties it got its big break playing the part of Charlton Heston’s beard in that Moses movie. We believe that the hair is actually what the Israelites volunteered to follow – it emoted smoke by day and fire by night.
We know this because we’ve seen the original script. It’s quite tattered.
Normally Kate Hudson’s hair earns her nothing but accolades and free head-strokings everywhere she goes. Now though – it’s kind of gotten her into a pretty big lawsuit.
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by Stuart Heritage
Ladies! Are you young, blonde, famous and determined to live out the minutiae of your personal life in the harrowing glare of the media?
You ARE? Well what are you waiting around here for? You’re exactly Lance Armstrong’s cup of tea. And he’s single too, now, so form an orderly queue and before long you – yes you! – could be feeling Lance’s solitary testicle smacking repeatedly against your inner thigh during one of several sordid bunk-ups!
Lance Armstrong is single, by the way, because he’s split up with Kate Hudson. They were going out. They were. What do you mean you didn’t know? Don’t you understand how important any of this is? Cuh.
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