The most exciting event in Big Brother history has just happened.

Unfortunately, the incident happened in America and not in the UK where so far the most exciting thing to do for viewers is count how many times Luke mentions the £100k cheque.

We’re always told that things don’t go truly mental until the series kicks off, gets into its stride and sees housemates go quite mental. Sadly the UK version is halfway through and still as exciting as pouring vinegar over your own open wounds.

Consequently we’re switching to America for some entertainment. Quite literally we’re thanking God for turning the equally boring show into something worth watching. Fear not, we’ve got a video of it as well, after the jump.

Was that exciting or what?

Honestly, we’re going to constantly play that video whenever the UK version gets dangerously boring. Actually we may have to that right now. Rex is taking about his restaurants, Lisa’s blabbing on that she possesses gypsy powers, Darnell is inappropriately swearing and Kat is singing. Absolutely no change at all there then.

But if you were wishing for some Big Brother housemates to perish in a pit of rubble you’d be disappointed. The earthquake that measured 5.4 on the richter scale only lasted around fifteen seconds – not enough to make a Hollywood disaster movie on the events, but surely enough to make someone traumatised for life.

It wasn’t just reality show morons that were affected by God’s mighty decision to shift the earth, with stony-faced Judge Judy also feeling the true power of the space magician himself.

How Hollywood copes with all these earthquakes we don’t know, but it does make us wish that the UK had some sort of natural disasters to spice things up. Boring football matches would be made a lot more interesting if comets were hurtling towards the pitch.

Or what about making the banker from Deal Or No Deal a bit harder? It would make the contestants less thrilled, to say the least, if they knew there was the chance of picking a box with no money, instead offering a chance at death via a one-on-one gladiatorial conflict. It would certainly ramp up the pressure, that’s for certain.

God, if you are reading hecklerspray as you normally do, can you send a plague of flesh eating termites to the UK Big Brother house? Now that’ll make decent television.

(Yes, we’re quite aware that’s two stories covering one earthquake, but come on! Footage of these reactions is priceless!)

Now we don’t have all the details – but from what we understand Judge Judy recently found an entire earthquake guilty of putting all of its tenants’ belongings out on the curb just because he didn’t pay rent for three months.

Those case details are a bit shaky, pun intended, but what we know for sure is that Judy’s courtroom was shaken all to pieces by a LA earthquake that happened a few days ago.

Footage has leaked, don’t you know, which allows each of us to watch Judy yell at the earthquake, tell it it’s an idiot, and after it refused to calm down – order her bailiff to escort it out to the lobby where it would have to wait until a verdict was reached.

An earthquake is a phenomena much more powerful than anything else in nature. Hurricanes just blow things around – yeah, that’s impressive. Monsoons can only splash you with things like water, and…um…water. This doesn’t impress us.

An earthquake though – those things can tear through mountains with nothing but, bare hands, Aerosmith’s greatest hits and a bottle of delicious Jolt cola, which is available in a 16 pack for the unheard of low-price of $11.99 for a limited time only at participating Sam’s Clubs.

Yes, earthquakes truly are mother nature’s most furious beast. This may confuse those who thought that title belonged to Judge Judy. We were confused about all that too – until we saw the video footage of Judy coming face to face with an earthquake on the set of her show.

The National Ledger describes the scene:

“Judge Judy rules with an iron fist and at times it might seem like an earthquake is coming down when she delivers a no nonsense ruling, especially if you are on the losing end of a Judge Judy ruling.  But when the Los Angeles earthquake hit on Tuesday the cameras (as always) were rolling in the courtroom as the earth was rolling and jumping form the California quake….One of those tapes is now online and it shows our favorite television judge a bit shook up as she rules on a case between a man and a woman.”

In the end she found the earthquake guilty, and ordered it to pay the plaintiff $320 plus court costs.

Don’t worry about earthquake though – it comes from money. See for yourself.