The set-up of Jon & Kate Plus 8 is simple – he’s a chubby pushover, she’d kick a donkey in the face for cash.

That’s how it works. Kate Gosselin is the one who wants to pimp out her kids in TV shows and books and anything else that’d make her a quick buck, and Jon Gosselin is the one who mooches around silently in the background like a lost testicle. Isn’t it?

Nope – apparently Jon Gosselin is designing his own line of kid’s clothes. And his children will model it – especially the ‘Mommy Is A Heartless Shrew’ range of cotton dungarees.

The parallels between Jon and Kate Gosselin and Jordan and Peter Andre at the moment are slightly uncanny. Both couples were on television together all the time. Both couples are getting divorced. Both are famous despite their total lack of any discernible talent. Both relationships had an uncomfortable dynamic that involved the woman verbally putting the man down in a disinterested robot monotone at every opportunity. And you definitely, definitely wouldn’t like to spend even a single moment trapped in an enclosed space with any of them.

Crucially, though, it also seems like both sets of men are going to leave their relationship much more famous than they were when they entered it. Before he split up with Kate, Jon Gosselin was happy enough to play the put-upon, ambition-free loser to her evil, peacock-headed Terminator – but that’s all changed now.

People have grown so tired of Kate Gosselin that she’s not even allowed to publish her new cookbook, but Jon Gosselin? He’s on an unstoppable ascent. For instance, Jon spent last weekend frolicking about on a St Tropez yacht with a pretty young plastic surgeon’s daughter called Hailey Glassman, and now it’s been announced that he’s going to design a brand new range of kid’s clothes. The Chicago Sun-Times reports:

The newly separated “Jon & Kate Plus 8″ dad will create a line of children’s clothing with Christian Audigier. “Everyone knows this family. And everyone will know our clothes,” the French designer said. “They’ll be fun, easy clothes for kids.”… Glassman will “have a lot of input with Christian,” Gosselin said. And he said the eight kids from his 10-year marriage to Kate will model the clothes in ads.

OK, great, that sounds completely fine to us. No problems with letting your brand-new girlfriend – the one who’s directly related to the man who your ex-wife employed to make her look prettier – help to design a range of clothes that your own children will model in a series of high-profile adverts. That can absolutely not backfire on you, your ex-wife, your new girlfriend or any of your children in any way, shape or form whatsoever.

And, on the slightest off-chance that it does, at least it wouldn’t all be filmed for an internationally-broadcast television series that would act as a lasting reminder for you children of what a pair of utterly clueless parents they had, would it?

Oh, wait.

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