Articles tagged with: Jon and Kate Gosselin
Jon & Kate Gosselin Somehow Remember They Have Kids
Gosselin birthdays are fun. True, there's just as much shrieking anguish as there is every other day. But sometimes they get to wear funny hats. Yesterday marked the ninth birthdays of Gosselin twins Mady and Cara, and so Jon and Kate Gosselin decided to give them the greatest gift of all. No, not a promise to stop making Jon & Kate Plus 8. No, not a course of hypnotherapy to help them regain the childhood that their parents snatched from them. Jon and Kate gave the twins an afternoon of no fighting. And a birthday cake that couldn't spell their names right. Obviously.
Gosselin birthdays are fun. True, there's just as much shrieking anguish as there is every other day. But sometimes they get to wear funny hats. Yesterday marked the ninth birthdays of Gosselin twins Mady and Cara, and so Jon and Kate Gosselin decided to give them the greatest gift of all. No, not a promise to stop making Jon & Kate Plus 8. No, not a course of hypnotherapy to help them regain the childhood that their parents snatched from them. Jon and Kate gave the twins an afternoon of no fighting. And a birthday cake that couldn't spell their names right. Obviously.
Jon & Kate Gosselin Yet To Realise That Nobody Cares
Remember when Jon & Kate Plus 8 was fun? No, of course you don't - it's only either been tedious or depressing. And now it's both. But somehow even more so. But still, at least the personal lives of Jon and Kate Gosselin are hilariously tragic, so that's something. Both Jon and Kate have been whining to the media over the last few days - Kate because she's lonely and Jon because he hates Jon & Kate Plus 8. It's sad. No, wait, not sad - what's the word for when you want to start cutting yourself because someone won't shut up? Anyway, it's that.
Remember when Jon & Kate Plus 8 was fun? No, of course you don't - it's only either been tedious or depressing. And now it's both. But somehow even more so. But still, at least the personal lives of Jon and Kate Gosselin are hilariously tragic, so that's something. Both Jon and Kate have been whining to the media over the last few days - Kate because she's lonely and Jon because he hates Jon & Kate Plus 8. It's sad. No, wait, not sad - what's the word for when you want to start cutting yourself because someone won't shut up? Anyway, it's that.
TLC Denies Us The Jon & Kate Plus 8 Bitchfight From Hell
Despite all the headlines it's been generating, people always forget one thing about Jon & Kate Plus 8. It's boring. Really boring. Have you ever tried to sit through an entire episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8? No? Well don't. It's rubbish. Ooh, some kids are baking some cakes. Ooh, some kids are going to the zoo. The only people who could truly enjoy Jon & Kate Plus 8 are heavily sedated pederasts, and even they wouldn't love it. TLC could spice up the show by making Jon Gosselin's alleged mistress a central character. But TLC says it won't. TLC is rubbish.
Despite all the headlines it's been generating, people always forget one thing about Jon & Kate Plus 8. It's boring. Really boring. Have you ever tried to sit through an entire episode of Jon & Kate Plus 8? No? Well don't. It's rubbish. Ooh, some kids are baking some cakes. Ooh, some kids are going to the zoo. The only people who could truly enjoy Jon & Kate Plus 8 are heavily sedated pederasts, and even they wouldn't love it. TLC could spice up the show by making Jon Gosselin's alleged mistress a central character. But TLC says it won't. TLC is rubbish.
Jon & Kate Divorce: They’ve Been Separated For Two Years, Ish
Jon & Kate Plus 8 is heartbreaking, isn't it? Truly heartbreaking. Their divorce announcement just came out of the blue. Well, alright, not quite out of the blue - thanks to every single magazine in the world banging on about all the affairs that Jon and Kate Gosselin have allegedly been having all the time, you don't have to be a genius to see that their marriage has been in trouble for a few weeks now. Well, alright, not quite a few weeks - according to divorce papers, Jon and Kate Gosselin have been separated for two entire years. Oh, divorce is hilarious.
Jon & Kate Plus 8 is heartbreaking, isn't it? Truly heartbreaking. Their divorce announcement just came out of the blue. Well, alright, not quite out of the blue - thanks to every single magazine in the world banging on about all the affairs that Jon and Kate Gosselin have allegedly been having all the time, you don't have to be a genius to see that their marriage has been in trouble for a few weeks now. Well, alright, not quite a few weeks - according to divorce papers, Jon and Kate Gosselin have been separated for two entire years. Oh, divorce is hilarious.
Jon & Kate Gosselin Shockingly Decide To Shockingly Divorce
Oh boy, we didn't see this coming. Remember when Jon and Kate Gosselin said they were making an announcement? Well, they've made it. In our office Jon & Kate Plus 8 sweepstake, we put money on the announcement being about a new recipe for gooseberry jam. But no - in a move that literally nobody on Earth could have possibly seen coming, Jon and Kate Gosselin have stunningly revealed that they're to split. That's split as in divorce, by the way, not split as in split open their kids' skulls with a hammer if they answer back. Although that's probably feasible too.
Oh boy, we didn't see this coming. Remember when Jon and Kate Gosselin said they were making an announcement? Well, they've made it. In our office Jon & Kate Plus 8 sweepstake, we put money on the announcement being about a new recipe for gooseberry jam. But no - in a move that literally nobody on Earth could have possibly seen coming, Jon and Kate Gosselin have stunningly revealed that they're to split. That's split as in divorce, by the way, not split as in split open their kids' skulls with a hammer if they answer back. Although that's probably feasible too.
