HecklerSpray

Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy

Jessica Simpson/ Tony Romo Split: Let’s Blame The Creepy Dad!

By Stuart Heritage

Jessica Simpson, Tony Romo, Jessica Simpson Tony Romo split, Joe SimpsonWhy did Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo split up? There are countless possible reasons, too many to list.

But only one of them is hilarious. So let’s go with that. Reports are suggesting that Tomy Romo ran away from Jessica Simpson because of her meddling, breast-fixated father, Joe Simpson. Apparently one of the factors for the split was Joe’s insistence on giving Tony endless advice about how to do his job properly.

It’s such a waste, especially when poor old Pete Wentz is crying out for advice about how to write better songs. And what a decent haircut looks like.

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Ashlee Simpson/ Pete Wentz Wedding: The Daddy-Heavy Details

By Stuart Heritage

Saturday’s Ashlee Simpson/ Pete Wentz wedding may have been the wedding of the year, proving forever that this is a lame-ass year.

But maybe you really do think that the Ashlee Simpson/ Pete Wentz wedding was the wedding of the year. Maybe you genuinely believe that the love between Ashlee and Pete is deep and genuine and true and pure and everlasting. Maybe, in other words, you’re an idiot.

If so then you’ll want to read on, because a whole bunch of new Ashlee Simpson/ Pete Wentz wedding secrets have got out. And, somewhat brilliantly, they all seem to involve Ashlee’s overbearing father Joe Simpson, who was so heavily involved in the whole shebang that you can’t help but sense his disappointment that it wasn’t him getting married to his own 23-year-old daughter. Possibly.

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