Articles tagged with: Jerry Lewis
Jerry Lewis To Eat Broadway Or Something
If there's one thing Hecklerspray thoroughly enjoys, it's necking with the various plant life naturally inhabiting Puerto Rico. Sure - you may think that sounds weird but that's just because you've never seen one of their shrubs in a bikini. You should go in the late spring - that's when things are particularly leafy. If there's another thing we love it's watching Broadway shows written by heavy-set senior citizens who carry guns through airport metal detectors and then fake dismay when TSA declines them that privilege. Lucky for us, then, that Jerry Lewis is bringing his Nutty Professor movie to Broadway.
If there's one thing Hecklerspray thoroughly enjoys, it's necking with the various plant life naturally inhabiting Puerto Rico. Sure - you may think that sounds weird but that's just because you've never seen one of their shrubs in a bikini. You should go in the late spring - that's when things are particularly leafy. If there's another thing we love it's watching Broadway shows written by heavy-set senior citizens who carry guns through airport metal detectors and then fake dismay when TSA declines them that privilege. Lucky for us, then, that Jerry Lewis is bringing his Nutty Professor movie to Broadway.
Jerry Lewis Slags Off The Gays Via The Medium Of Cricket
When it comes to the anti-gay slur, there's perhaps no greater master than Jerry Lewis - the man is nothing short of a maestro. Just over a year since Jerry Lewis last got into trouble for airing his uniquely fruity views on homosexuals during a live telethon, he's done it again. This time, Jerry Lewis managed to offend all the gays in the world while in Australia, where he told a reporter that cricket is "a fag game." Obviously that's a completely outrageous thing to say, and it's obvious why so many people have reacted to Jerry Lewis' comment with horror. By calling cricket a fag game, Jerry Lewis has displayed not only a casual intolerance of homosexuals but also a huge lack of education - cricket isn't a fag game at all. It's a crap game that only turds enjoy. Again, cricket is a crap game that only turds enjoy.
When it comes to the anti-gay slur, there's perhaps no greater master than Jerry Lewis - the man is nothing short of a maestro. Just over a year since Jerry Lewis last got into trouble for airing his uniquely fruity views on homosexuals during a live telethon, he's done it again. This time, Jerry Lewis managed to offend all the gays in the world while in Australia, where he told a reporter that cricket is "a fag game." Obviously that's a completely outrageous thing to say, and it's obvious why so many people have reacted to Jerry Lewis' comment with horror. By calling cricket a fag game, Jerry Lewis has displayed not only a casual intolerance of homosexuals but also a huge lack of education - cricket isn't a fag game at all. It's a crap game that only turds enjoy. Again, cricket is a crap game that only turds enjoy.
Jerry Lewis Caught With Hands Full Of Empty Gun
Sometimes muscular dystrophy is stopped by well intentioned telethons raising money for its cure, and sometimes to stop it - you have to shoot it all to hell. Jerry Lewis has tried the former thousands of times. He's raised hundreds of millions of dollars to fight the disfiguring beast - but it keeps coming back. He raises more money... then it comes back again. It's as if his efforts are all for nought. Well Lewis has had it - he's apparently found out where muscular dystrophy lives, and was flying there to confront it with a bullet-hungry gun. Airport authorities probably don't care about the welfare of muscular dystrophy, and may even root for Lewis when the final battle goes down, but when they found him with a firearm on the far side of the metal detector, they had to detain him anyway.
Sometimes muscular dystrophy is stopped by well intentioned telethons raising money for its cure, and sometimes to stop it - you have to shoot it all to hell. Jerry Lewis has tried the former thousands of times. He's raised hundreds of millions of dollars to fight the disfiguring beast - but it keeps coming back. He raises more money... then it comes back again. It's as if his efforts are all for nought. Well Lewis has had it - he's apparently found out where muscular dystrophy lives, and was flying there to confront it with a bullet-hungry gun. Airport authorities probably don't care about the welfare of muscular dystrophy, and may even root for Lewis when the final battle goes down, but when they found him with a firearm on the far side of the metal detector, they had to detain him anyway.
