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Jenna Jameson

No matter where a story happens, Joslyn James is right there in the action. So long as it’s a story about Tiger Woods’s penis, obviously.

And so long as there’s clear financial motivation for her to discuss it. But wait – Josyln James isn’t just the Tiger Woods mistress most determined to cling onto her nanosecond of barely-fame. She’s the Tiger Woods mistress and alleged Tito Ortiz domestic violence witness most determined to cling onto her nanosecond of barely-fame. Apparently Joslyn James saw Tito Ortiz beat Jenna Jameson up on three separate occasions before his arrest on Monday.

This means that Josyln James is becoming the go-to woman for inside info on crap men. Who’ll be next? Jesse James? Chris Brown? Deposed African despot Charles Arthur? Christ alive, we hope it’s Charles Arthur. Joslyn, if you’re reading this, go out and have sex with Charles Arthur for us quickly.

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Ultimate fighting is a misnomer, isn’t it? We’ve seen a few matches, and it’s really just aggressive spooning.

Ultimate fighters are wimps. But, hey, at least they can allegedly knock about former porn stars quite well, so that’s something. Just look at former ultimate fighting champion Tito Ortiz – he’s been arrested on charges of domestic abuse against his girlfriend Jenna Jameson, who has been seen with her arm in a bandage since the arrest.

That all sounds fairly depressing, but let’s look on the bright side here. In Tito Ortiz and Jenna Jameson, it looks like the world has finally found its Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie of jumped-up professional wrestlers and women who have sex with men in exchange for cash who beat each other up a lot. See? It doesn’t seem quite as bad when you look at it like that, does it?

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For millions of years, men and women have had sexy time and produced offspring in the form of children.

At some point in a woman’s life they will want to mate with their respective partner. Either they want to take a step back from everything or let their children carry on their legacy.

Former porn star Jenna Jameson finally breathed a sigh of relief this week when her twin boys escaped the womb. Obviously we expect mother and father to be ecstatically overcome with joy, but when the youngsters grow up, talks about the birds and the bees could be quite interesting.

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Jenna Jameson Quits Porn retiresYes, you read it right the first time single fellas and lesbians; Jenna Jameson, that great Comrade of the Cock – the Velociraptor of the Vulva – has broken off the unwritten agreement she had with your – nay, the world's – right hand.

The 34-year-old veteran made the announcement at the AVN (Adult Video News) Awards in Las Vegas on Saturday.

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