jeff beck - HecklerSpray

Separating the sweet, juicy flesh from the stone and skin of this week?s major label releases.

They say you should never meet your heroes; that they will always leave you underwhelmed and disappointed. And it’s true: we once ran into Frankie Boyle in a chip shop in Leicester.

We made numerous attempts to goad him into getting his swear on (“You’re not very funny”, “You look like a paedophilic fish”, Your jokes consist of nothing more than pointing out that someone has died or is disabled, and then swearing at them”, and “In order to give the illusion that you are in any way amusing, you have to appear on a stage with Dara O’Briain, Hugh Dennis and whoever that little blonde boy is”.)

Nothing worked, and eventually the Scottish gag-fluffer scuttled into the night with his steaming treasure, leaving us saddened that he had failed to notice that the woman behind the counter was missing an index finger, and thus deserved to be swore at.

Which brings us to…

It’s our favourite time of the year – the time when the shortlisted nominees for next year’s induction to the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame are announced.

Why is it our favourite time of the year? Because we know that from hereon in, it’s going to be a whistlestop pedal-to-the-metal seven-month funride until the bands eventually chosen to go into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame get properly inducted. Seven months. Seven poxy months that we’ll never get back. Fun.

So who could be going into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame next year? Why only Run-DMC, Metallica, The Stooges, Jeff Beck, Wanda Jackson, Chic, Little Anthony And The Imperials, Bobby Womack and War. That’s War the concept of organised military disputes between feuding nations and not War the 1970s jazz-funk fusion band responsible for hits like Why Can’t We Be Friends, by the way. That struck us as weird, too.

Hecklerspray’s Monday Music Mango: Jeff Beck, MGMT, Murs & 9th Wonder

Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame Shortlist: Run-DMC, Metallica, Other Old Gits