Jay Leno Won’t Be Going Away Forever Anytime Soon… Sigh

Do you wonder that there isn’t a huge ‘IDIOT’ stamp on the foreheads of some people?

You know who we mean… the people that think Sarah Jessica Parker isn’t rather horsey looking and own Everybody Loves Raymond box sets and use words like ‘exspecially’ and have read all of the Nicholas Sparks books. Well, these are the same people that think Jay Leno is funny – no, really, apparently there are people out there who think that – and now these people are running big huge media networks and are trying to get Jay Leno to come not be funny for them when his contract expires next year.  

Oh, forget the stamp. The closest blunt object will do. 

Jay Leno Wins Joke-Based Lawsuit, Remains Woefully Unfunny

You should never rip off one of Jay Leno's jokes - mainly because it's bound to be so unfunny that you'll lose your job, be dumped by your girlfriend and end up dying alone on the streets.

But also there's a chance that Jay Leno will sue you and win. And that's what's just happened. Jay Leno has just won a lawsuit against Judy Brown, who published compendiums containing jokes stolen from his routines.

And as a result Judy Brown will have to publish something less funny instead, like... nope, there isn't any less funny than one of Jay Leno's jokes. 

Writers Guild Disappointed In Jay Leno, Murder Still Not On The Menu

Jay Leno is going about this writers strike all wrong. Here he sits with a rare opportunity to experiment in a writer-free world, and you know what he's doing? Nothing!

We happen to know for a fact that Leno has been offered the chance to neuter 15 pencil-thin Mexicans on live TV and he didn't even respond to our email! Well it looks like Jay Leno wants our neighbour across-the-street to keep breeding more Mexican baby basement slaves then, now doesn't it. You've won this round Mr. Johnson, but you can't enslave a child that isn't here!

Non existence is the ultimate freedom! 

But as much as he is impartial to the enslavement of children and probably their parents in Johnson's cellar, Jay Leno is un-impartial about the writers strike. He went back to work recently with the blessing of the Writers Guild, and delivered an impeccable monologue. The thing was so good that the Writers Guild thinks he may be using a secret writing staff and now they want to kill him forever.

We wrote that lat bit from scratch. Sweeping and powerful, right? We're not union.