Hipster Nick Knowles, James Franco, the man fancied by women who like to think they’re clever, is making a porn film. Get that? Porn. In a film. With James Franco. We imagine there will be flash flooding in certain undercarriages right now.
However, we’d like to put the scuppers on your arousal by pointing out that this won’t be a bongo film starring Franco, but rather, a vaguely pretentious documentary made by the actor.
Don’t worry. There’s some salacious stuff for you to get your teeth into all the same, you sickening debauchotrons.
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Arm-hacking enthusiast James Franco has confirmed the end of five-year relationship with actress Ahna O’Reilly citing a love of books as the reason for their terminating their ‘love contract’.
The actor, famous for managing to look handsome while cutting off his arm in ’127 Hours’ has confirmed his five-year romance with Ahna O’Reilly has ended because he is so busy with his other education commitments, although he did not manage to reveal when they ended their relationship, presumably realising that no-one would give two hoots.
Women everywhere (who read Playboy?) are said to be feeling listless and lost. First George Clooney becomes single and now George Clooney Jnr has become single. Who do they go for? Who do they pin their idiotic hopes on? They’ll never get either of them, but now there’s two.
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The slightly good looking version of Dean Gaffney, James Franco, has inexplicably decided to open his mouth and let some words come out. The current words of choice revolve around social networking.
According to Mr Franco, who we have to confess to having absolutely no idea who he is, social networking is as dead as a dead duck.
Of course, this fella who is probably some kind of jazz singer like Michael Buble or something, has been an avid Tweeter but now thinks that twitter is over and done with.
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This week in cool and crap.
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Ah! The Oscars! The awards ceremony that means absolutely piss-all to anyone apart from those who make posters for films and rental DVDs. Having ‘Oscar Winner’ on your blurb makes you look like you know what you’re doing, even if you won the award for providing the best prosthetic ears or something.
Anyway, Tinseltown is getting all excited in preparation for the event as are, presumably, the various cocaine dealers in the vicinity.
But who will present the awards? Well, you’ll be thrilled to learn that it is none-other than Anne Hathaway and James Franco! You know? Those two. They uh… umm… their names are familiar aren’t they? Are they in that vampire show? No? Read More >>>
When looking for someone to act as the once-prodigious, now-dead Jeff Buckley why not go for talent on the level of Robert Pattinson?
After all, he is an actor lacking any discernable passion, he is attractive in a thoroughly mediocre way and he’s generally a bit crap.
It’s a perfect fit for the lead role in the still-vaunted biopic of Jeff Buckley. Especially if Pattinson is into method acting and decides to do his own stunts. In the drowning scene.
Too harsh?
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