Iron Man - HecklerSpray

Disney Changes The Name Of The Avengers, Let’s All Blame Honor Blackman

February 29th, 2012 By Robin Darke

Hands up if you were excited seeing The Avengers when it gets released in April. Well we?ll just go ahead and chop those hands off because it seems that you won't be seeing The Avengers anytime soon. Nope. Disney has decided that the great British public, those responsible for making Katie Price a business woman, are too stupid to realise that a film being released in 2012 has absolutely no similarities to a 1960s TV show.

What's that about?

What's that about, indeed hecklersprayers? Disney, who bought Marvel Entertainment in 2009 for $4 billion, thinks that you're too stupid to differentiate between different characters four decades apart. Too stupid to realise that Captain America never appeared with John Steed. Too bumbling to see that Scarlett Johansson was clearly too young to be in it.

Marvel’s The Avengers Trailer Looks Really, Really Stupid

August 5th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

One of the big talking points from the Super Bowl commercial break was… well… Clint Eastwood. Away from that though, there’s a little excitement surrounding the trailer for Marvel’s The Avengers movie.

While most superhero flicks are brooding like Batman at the moment, it appears that The Avengers film is going to be pleasingly dumb, if the trailer is anything to go by.

So if you want to see it, strap in and watch things explode with?Captain America (Chris Evans), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr), Scarlett Johansson (Black Widow) and Hulk get into a giant scrap with a fella with long, greasy hair.

Smell Like A Superhero; Don’t Worry, It’s Not Condorman

January 24th, 2012 By Robin Darke

Ever wanted to smell like one of Marvel?s finest? Of course you have. If you said you'd be a stinking liar. See what we did there? Stinking. It's a joke! A funny joke! Oh, shut up a second and we?ll tell you how you can.

We've always longed for our lady friends to smell like Black Widow, and for our friends to smell like rejection, fear and Michael Fassbender: just like the X-Men.

The good people at Jads International, which sounds a lot like one of the stripping troupes that frequently visit the HS bedsit (Nads International) are bringing you a range of aftershaves that are themed around the main characters from the upcoming, and not at all Marvel?s last chance-saloon, The Avengers.

Will Iron Man 3 Be Any Good? Don't Ask Shane Black

April 4th, 2011 By Paul Pencott

You know Shane Black don't you? Scriptwriter of the first (and lest we forget, very good) Lethal Weapon (directed by Richard Donner, director of the original brilliant Superman), massively under-rated Last Boy Scout, Long Kiss Goodnight, director AND scriptwriter of utter geek-fest Kiss Kiss Bang Bang?

Well, he was all set to write and direct Iron Man 3 and everything was going to be LITERALLY brilliant. Reports now are that he's just been demoted from scriptwriting and directing duties on Iron Man 3 and will only direct instead.

Which is like demoting James Bond to an office-administrator.

Weekend Box Office: Iron Man Punches Robin Hood’s Face Off

May 16th, 2010 By Stuart Heritage

It was a straight battle of the heroes in this week’s weekend box office. In one corner there was Iron Man.

In the other, Robin Hood. In the other, if we’re being thorough, there’s the Amanda Seyfried character from that new film about letter-writing that looks like it’ll be a load of old bollocks. Who’ll come out on top? Why, Iron Man of course.

It goes without saying that Iron Man 2 beat both Robin Hood and Letters To Juliet at the US weekend box office this week. After all, Iron Man is a flying robot playboy who can shoot lasers out of his hands. And, you know, Robin Hood is a fat bloke with an unspecified regional accent who kills people with little bits of wood and then splodges around in some mud. And Amanda Seyfried is just annoying, obviously.

WEBTHUMP: 12 May 2010

August 6th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

10 – You will have seen this a billion times already, but because it’s funny, here’s Adam Boulton going all boogaloo on live TV – WatchWithMothers

9 – Kittens + slides = the internet – BestWeekEver

8 – Would you like to see a lovely silk scarf? OK, here is a lovely silk scarf – Interestment

7 – The best picture of Britney Spears gazing mournfully into a mirror that any of you will ever see – AmyGrindhouse

Creased or Folded? hecklerspray Tells You the Way it is

August 4th, 2012 By Chris Laverty

Good times and bad times.

Folded:

Tron Legacy teaser trailer (light cycles)
Rude Boy by Rihanna (she's finally made a decent track, and it's a big bottom belter)
Click (cool gadgetry stuff with TV’s greatest undiscovered presenter)
New character posters for Kick-Ass (what do you mean you’re not excited? Get that way!)
Rhod Gilbert’s Work Experience: Bin Man (watching mouthy Gilbert picking up crap is funnier than your might think)

Creased:

New Iron Man 2 trailer (Transformers briefcase)
Kristen Stewart (miserable cow)
The Gadget Show (too much clowning around. Keep expecting the theme from Art Attack to come on)

WEBTHUMP! Monday 30 March 2009

August 6th, 2012 By Stuart Heritage

10 – Happy Monday! Here’s a distressing story about cannibalism! – Thesun

9 – Here’s a bewilderingly strong man – I Am Bored

8 – The single most awkward photo you will ever see in your lives – Popsugar

7 – Ten people who almost destroyed fun – Spike

Robert Downey Jr Signs For The Disappointing Third Iron Man Film

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Robert Downey Jr knows a good thing when he sees it – like handguns, lots of Class A drugs and movies directed by Guy Ritchie.

OK OK OK, so Robert Downey Jr doesn’t know a good thing when he sees it. Probably seven out of ten times he knows a good thing when actually he sees a rubbish thing. But Robert Downey Jr does know what things will make him richer than his wildest dreams, and he chases those things like a dog.

According to reports, Robert Downey Jr has signed a contract securing him to Iron Man 3 and an Avengers movie. This is particularly good news for anyone who, while enjoying the original Iron Man, really wants to see Iron Man get overtaken by an alien, grow an evil haircut and then dancing the Twist with Kirsten Dunst while cooking some eggs. For Superhero Law states that all of the above must happen in Iron Man 3.

Christian Bale Assault Charges Result in Ultimate Punishment. That, or Just a Caution

March 24th, 2009 By Ian Dransfield

Christian Bale looks likely to get away with allegedly pushing his mum about, if he pleads guilty to assault.

The Welshman, who no one seems to realise is Welsh, has been recommended to receive a caution by the Crown Prosecution Service for his alleged actions, should he plead guilty to charges next month. If, however, he pleads not guilty then he could be looking at more severe penalties, all according to the bastion of truth, honour and glory that is The Sun newspaper.

Though, let’s be honest here – he probably wouldn’t be looking at any really severe charges. A fine, a slap on the wrist and a bruised ego, leaving the Baler ready to take on Terminator 4 and Batman 3. Unless the authorities were to decide on making an example of him and imprisoned him for life – alledgely pushing your mum and sister about is no laughing matter, after all.

Especially when they apparently want money from you.