Guess what tech fans! Those Chinese tinkerers have made another copy of an Apple trademark that’s bound to cause a stir, if not entirely offend fanboys and turtle neck wearers everywhere.

Having already found success with the SciPhone and a full sized replica Apple store, those crown princes of piracy, the Chinese, have now created THE ULTIMATE ACTION FIGURE, in the form of Apple founder Steve Jobs.

Steve Jobs. ACTION figure. ACTION… Steve Jobs?

Girls have their Barbies, boys have their Action Men and now, the long forgotten subset of androgynous hipsters that swathe around Shoreditch coffee houses will have their own doll to play and sexually experiment with.

Naturally, being an Apple product (albeit a fake Apple product) it’s ludicrously expensive, costing a whopping £65, doesn’t work with flash and it can’t play any real games. Not that you’d want it to play games, no, this action figure is all about the way it helps you do your design work, isn’t it?

You smarmy tit.

Rather predictably, Apple haven’t responded to this trademark infringement well. After all, what was Steve Jobs if not another trademark for Apple to profit off of?

Apple issued a statement to the Daily Mail, saying:

“Mr Jobs has not consented to the use of his name and/or image in the product.”

NO SHIT SHERLOCK, HE’S DEAD! We’re no experts, but we’re pretty sure it’s never going to be the easiest thing in the world for a Chinese company to obtain the image licensing rights to a deceased technology behemoth.

Aside from stating the obvious in the Mail, Apple are believed to have started legal proceedings against the two companies behind the Steve Jobs iAction figure, InIcon and Dragon in Dream.

They’re also rumoured to be preparing a press statement for the Independent that will confirm that the Pope is indeed a Catholic.

Described as ‘a full-on music festival that just happens to be taking place in the mountains’, Snowbombing is an exhilarating week-long whirlwind of momentous moments in mythical venues, delivered by a blizzard of brilliant bands and awesome avalanche of artists.

To get you primed for all that fun in the snow, Volvo and Snowbombing have kindly donated a snowboard, 8G iPod nano and iTunes vouchers to us, that one lucky winner can get their mitts on by answering a simple question…

Volvo is also giving five mates the chance to join the Snowbombing Road Trip via www.facebook.com/insidevolvouk! Driven by Volvo – 120 cars and 500 revved up Snowbombers driving from London to Mayhorfen, Austria – you’ll join DJs, celebs and bands including The Enemy and Reverend and The Makers for the ultimate travelling party.

Your final destination is Snowbombing – the music festival in the snow from 3rd – 10th April, with fantastic bands, parties and snowboarding, set against the stunning Austrian mountains. Plus Volvo will take care of your accommodation, ski and snowboard hire, lift passes AND you’ll get a brand new Volvo XC60 DRIVe to drive on the Road Trip!

To be in with a chance of winning the Snowboard, 8G iPod nano and £25 iTunes voucher simply watch the video below and answer this question:

Which of the following is one of the headliners at this Snowbombing festival this year?

•    Thin Man Chubby
•    Fatboy Slim
•    Fats and Small

Email your answer, along with your contact details to hello[AT]hecklerspray.com with the subject line ‘SNOWBOARD!’, and we’ll pick a winner at random at midnight on Sunday March 14. UK readers only, please. Good luck!

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The Hecklerspray office has been rocking today, thanks to a fantastic little device called the K-box, which transforms any flat surface into a speaker.

Yeah, you heard us. Floors and desks have never been so goddamned noisy before. It’s a sensation. Aimed at iPhones and similar portable music devices, the K-box will massively amplify the sound without needed a traditional speaker.

It’s genuinely a bit weird. You could theoretically turn a train carriage into a nightclub with this thing.

So how does it work? Well, it has a gel surface that transfers and projects sound. What’s remarkable is the amount of bass you get from the K-box.

Check out this video, from another K-box user, which demonstrates what we’ve been experiencing:

The K-box costs £39.99 and is exclusive to Kerchoonz, a social networking platform for music fans and artists.

Of all the gays in the world, we love Elton John the best.

Not so much that we’d like to replace David Furnish as his partner, but we’d at least like a sly kiss from the rocket man.

Over the years, we’ve reinacted some of Elton’s finest moments. From throwing tantrums in airports, re-recording songs for dead princesses, trying to shut down the internet and dressing in stupid clothing, we’ve done it all. Now he’s gone and done something equally as crazy by launching his own line of unique iPods! Is there nothing this man can’t do?

At the moment, a run-of-the-mill bog-standard iPod which is as common as everyone else’s will set you back around £200. In these nutbusting credit-crunching times, it may not have been one of Elton’s finest ideas to introduce a spectacular bejewelled iPod design at £400. Still, he has ensured that the iPods are crazy and unique, just like the creator. Digital Spy reports:

“Sir Elton has ordered 1000 iPods in a range of ten colours, each of which has his signature lasered on the back.”

So you’re probably thinking, “why should I invest?”

a) There are only seven colours in the world – red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo and violet. Elton John has made his iPods in ten colours – he’s created three new colours! It’ll be like buying a piece of history when he reveals his new oxtronkadon. biazteff and wooper colours.

b) You can use the lasered signature on the iPod to forge cheques for mega expensive items and improve your own crappy life.

c) When Elton dies, it’ll go up in value to at least £500. Then you can look all smug when appearing on The Antiques Roadshow.

A spokesperson for Elton said that his iPods are:

“Extravagant and glamorous just like him.”

If we owned one of these, we wouldn’t like that at all. Instead we’d be petrified that the crystals would fall out and lead a gang of knife-wielding hoodies to our frond door, Hansel And Gretel-style. Could happen.

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