Uma Thurman’s Stalker Really Creepy, Just Not Illegally So Jack Jordan, you've let us down. All that time you were stalking Uma Thurman in a number of imaginatively creepy ways, we thought you were being illegal. And now your lawyer is saying that you weren't being illegal in an effort to keep you out of jail? That is very disappointing, Jack Jordan. Very disappointing indeed. But on the plus side, if Jack Jordan is acquitted of his Uma Thurman stalking charges, it basically means that we're all legally free to send the object of our obsession terrifying hand-drawn pictures of ourselves walking along a razorblade while they eeirly dig our graves. Good lord, Martine McCutcheon had better hope that Jack Jordan is found guilty.

Brad Pitt’s And Angelina Jolie’s Marriage Potentially Poppycock

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie love and trust each other so much that they have decided to sign a legally binding contract making it a huge financial risk for either of them to sleep with anyone else.

According to Star Magazine website, the world's most famous couple made their love official (any love outside of marriage is unofficial - fact) in New Orleans on Saturday.

What a scoop for Star Magazine! But not so according to people.com, who claim it’s all a big bag of overflowing poppycock.