Articles tagged with: House
Britney Spears Moves House. Look Interested
We've got some good news and some bad news for you. The bad news is that this is the dullest Britney Spears story in the world. Britney Spears is moving house. That's roughly it. She lived somewhere, soon she'll be living somewhere else and that's it. On a Twitter post, Britney Spears claimed that she'd shown her kids around the new house and they apparently love it. This is the bad news. The good news is that Britney Spears decided to sell her old home at the height of this economic crisis. We assume that means Britney Spears is still slightly mental. Win.
We've got some good news and some bad news for you. The bad news is that this is the dullest Britney Spears story in the world. Britney Spears is moving house. That's roughly it. She lived somewhere, soon she'll be living somewhere else and that's it. On a Twitter post, Britney Spears claimed that she'd shown her kids around the new house and they apparently love it. This is the bad news. The good news is that Britney Spears decided to sell her old home at the height of this economic crisis. We assume that means Britney Spears is still slightly mental. Win.
Paula Abdul Understandably Spooked Out About That Dead Lady
Paula Abdul once sang a duet with a chainsmoking cartoon hip-hop cat, so she knows weird when she sees it. But when a woman who a) looked like Paula, b) painted lifesize pictures of Paula and c) appeared on the TV show that Paula judges died outside Paula Abdul's house surrounded by pictures and CDs all bearing Paula Abdul's image in a car with a licence plate that professed her love for Paula Abdul, that may have tipped things to a new level. Apparently Paula Abdul hasn't slept in her own house since any of this happened. Well, duh.
Paula Abdul once sang a duet with a chainsmoking cartoon hip-hop cat, so she knows weird when she sees it. But when a woman who a) looked like Paula, b) painted lifesize pictures of Paula and c) appeared on the TV show that Paula judges died outside Paula Abdul's house surrounded by pictures and CDs all bearing Paula Abdul's image in a car with a licence plate that professed her love for Paula Abdul, that may have tipped things to a new level. Apparently Paula Abdul hasn't slept in her own house since any of this happened. Well, duh.
Near-Tragic House Fire Another Excuse To Show Nick Nolte’s Funny Mugshot
Actor Nick Nolte yesterday managed to escape a house fire which swept through his Malibu mansion causing $3 million in damage. According to reports, Nick Nolte only clambered to safety from the blaze - said to be caused by an electrical fault - by smashing through a window to safety, after which he was treated for minor injuries and smoke inhalation. Although the material cost of the house fire is immense, we should all be thankful that Nick Nolte managed to evade the inferno without any serious injuries, because this way we get to accompany the story with a picture of Nick Nolte's 2002 DUI arrest mugshot. Ha ha ha, look! He's wearing a funny shirt! And his hair's all like 'woarrrgh' too! Ha ha ha. What a big idiot.
Actor Nick Nolte yesterday managed to escape a house fire which swept through his Malibu mansion causing $3 million in damage. According to reports, Nick Nolte only clambered to safety from the blaze - said to be caused by an electrical fault - by smashing through a window to safety, after which he was treated for minor injuries and smoke inhalation. Although the material cost of the house fire is immense, we should all be thankful that Nick Nolte managed to evade the inferno without any serious injuries, because this way we get to accompany the story with a picture of Nick Nolte's 2002 DUI arrest mugshot. Ha ha ha, look! He's wearing a funny shirt! And his hair's all like 'woarrrgh' too! Ha ha ha. What a big idiot.
Britney Spears Wants Nice House For Her Kids To Occasionally Visit
Now that Britney Spears can once again experience the delights of waking in up in the middle of the night because her kids are crying, it's time for a rethink.
You see, Britney Spears has recently been told that her children are now allowed to spend overnight visits with her, an important step towards regaining custody. But Britney doesn't want to keep her kids in squashed-together, paparazzi-filled Beverly Hills any more - she wants them to live somewhere safer, somewhere cleaner, somewhere with a huge garden that the children can play in.
That's right, Britney Spears is preparing to move house, which means that Britney's current abode could soon be up for sale. We hear it's the perfect place for anyone who likes their houses huge, reeking of cigarette smoke and full of fun character features like puddles of tears and disturbing fingernail scratches gouged into every available surface.
Ed McMahon’s House Way Too Expensive For Ed McMahon’s Wallet
When we were in sixth grade we got to school one day, and three periods in when it was our turn to give the in-depth presentation that we’d worked on for over a week – it wasn’t in our bag. We turned our desk inside-out that day – but to no avail. We were crying at the window as our teacher wrote a big red F next to our name in his spiral grade-book, that’s when we saw it – Ed McMahon sprinting across the playground with our missing assignment in hand. He was more dragging it, actually. After all the thing was over 20 feet long. We’d invented the Publisher’s Clearing House giant check printer. We would have gladly shared it with the world for free – but McMahon wouldn’t allow it. He patented the blue prints and made millions. It doesn’t matter now though because it wasn’t enough – his house is going into foreclosure. That’s karma, Ed. You are just like China.
When we were in sixth grade we got to school one day, and three periods in when it was our turn to give the in-depth presentation that we’d worked on for over a week – it wasn’t in our bag. We turned our desk inside-out that day – but to no avail. We were crying at the window as our teacher wrote a big red F next to our name in his spiral grade-book, that’s when we saw it – Ed McMahon sprinting across the playground with our missing assignment in hand. He was more dragging it, actually. After all the thing was over 20 feet long. We’d invented the Publisher’s Clearing House giant check printer. We would have gladly shared it with the world for free – but McMahon wouldn’t allow it. He patented the blue prints and made millions. It doesn’t matter now though because it wasn’t enough – his house is going into foreclosure. That’s karma, Ed. You are just like China.
50 Cent Still To Call Smoke-Damaged Son After House Fire
Typical - first 50 Cent releases an album and it's upstaged by Kanye West's album, and now his house fire's been upstaged by the Universal Studios fire. Not that a little thing like the Back To The Future clocktower burning down will stop people from being curious about the 50 Cent house fire, though - especially as it came right in the middle of an ugly public feud between 50 Cent and his ex-girlfriend Shaniqua Tompkins, who was living in the house at the time. And now the mystery has got a little deeper, because Tompkins is claiming that 50 Cent hasn't bothered to call their 10-year-old son Marquise after the fire, even though he was treated for smoke inhalation. But you know what they say - better to have no contact at all than to record a mawkish vom-inducing Eminem-style 'Daddy loves you' track about it.
Typical - first 50 Cent releases an album and it's upstaged by Kanye West's album, and now his house fire's been upstaged by the Universal Studios fire. Not that a little thing like the Back To The Future clocktower burning down will stop people from being curious about the 50 Cent house fire, though - especially as it came right in the middle of an ugly public feud between 50 Cent and his ex-girlfriend Shaniqua Tompkins, who was living in the house at the time. And now the mystery has got a little deeper, because Tompkins is claiming that 50 Cent hasn't bothered to call their 10-year-old son Marquise after the fire, even though he was treated for smoke inhalation. But you know what they say - better to have no contact at all than to record a mawkish vom-inducing Eminem-style 'Daddy loves you' track about it.
Someone Burns Down 50 Cent’s House, Probably
Just a hunch, but we imagine that 50 Cent's next album will be called Switch Off Your Electrical Appliances At Night Or Suffer Smoke Inhalation Trying. That's because 50 Cent's house has just spectacularly and completely burnt to the ground. But don't worry - 50 Cent is fine. The house that burnt down wasn't the house he lives in, just the house that his ex-girlfriend and their 10-year-old son live in. Phew! Panic over. They're both OK as well, by the way - but that hasn't stopped a fireman calling the blaze 'suspicious', not least because 50 Cent has been trying to evict his ex-girlfriend and son from the property for a while now. Still, if we know anything about the hip-hop community, it's that it's full of exemplary citizens who like nothing more than to cooperate with potentially criminal investigations by the authorities.
Just a hunch, but we imagine that 50 Cent's next album will be called Switch Off Your Electrical Appliances At Night Or Suffer Smoke Inhalation Trying. That's because 50 Cent's house has just spectacularly and completely burnt to the ground. But don't worry - 50 Cent is fine. The house that burnt down wasn't the house he lives in, just the house that his ex-girlfriend and their 10-year-old son live in. Phew! Panic over. They're both OK as well, by the way - but that hasn't stopped a fireman calling the blaze 'suspicious', not least because 50 Cent has been trying to evict his ex-girlfriend and son from the property for a while now. Still, if we know anything about the hip-hop community, it's that it's full of exemplary citizens who like nothing more than to cooperate with potentially criminal investigations by the authorities.
America’s Next Top Model Of A $500,000 Lawsuit
Campbell's not the only fashion model sometimes mistaken for hurricane Katrina - the up and comers on America's Next Top Model are apparently destructive too. That's precisely why their landlord is currently suing them.
The life of a fashion model is one filled with the finest linens, using three spoons per meal and luxury supersonic jets whisking them away to the closest reaches of outer space.
Campbell's not the only fashion model sometimes mistaken for hurricane Katrina - the up and comers on America's Next Top Model are apparently destructive too. That's precisely why their landlord is currently suing them.
