For some people the danger goes as soon as they leave Desperate Housewives, but others aren’t so lucky. Take Jesse Metcalfe, for example. On Saturday night Jesse fell 40ft off a hotel balcony down two flights of stairs in Monaco, knocked himself unconscious and broke his leg – and his publicist is claiming that he’s lucky to be alive.

But, as horrific as the accident sounds, it’s impossible not to see the bright side of this. True, Jesse Metcalfe could have died or suffered horrible brain injuries in the fall, but on the plus side at least everyone knows who Jesse Metcalfe is again. Oh, come on, you know. Jesse Metcalfe. Tall boy. Used to be on Desperate Housewives. No? Fair enough.

If we’ve learnt anything from today, it’s that you must never, ever mess with Lindsay Lohan. Seriously, ever. Look at the facts. Calum Best messed with Lindsay Lohan and he went bald, Barack Obama messed with Lindsay Lohan and he’s going to have to spend the next four years pretending to be friends with Vladimir Putin. And look what’s happened to Jesse Metcalfe.

You’ll remember that Lindsay Lohan was recently sacked as the host of the World Music Awards because she objected to the organisers’ plans to introduce Jesse Metcalfe as her co-host. And what happened? Jesse Metcalfe went to the World Music Awards and ended up having a brain scan because he plunged off a 40ft hotel balcony down two flights of stairs. Are we insinuating that Lindsay Lohan is some sort of voodoo priestess? No. We’re too frightened for that.

But the point is, in a roundabout way, that Jesse Metcalfe – Eva Longoria’s gardener in about three episodes of Desperate Housewives once – has buggered his body right up in the fall. Fox reports:

Jesse, 29, hosted the World Music Awards in Monte Carlo, France, on Sunday but slipped as he headed back to his hotel to change. He was rushed to hospital, then flown to London to be re-examined. An MRI brain scan gave him the all-clear but doctors confirmed he had fractured his fibula. The actor’s spokesman said last night: “Jesse knows he’s had a very lucky escape. The accident could have been fatal.”

While we’re pleased that Jesse Metcalfe didn’t suffer any career-threatening injuries in the fall – there’s still hope for John Tucker Must Die 2! Yay! – it does make us wonder what caused the fall. Alcohol hasn’t been acknowledged as a factor – despite Jesse’s stint in rehab for alcohol abuse – and his people seem to be blaming the hotel. But we think we know the real reason.

If you knew that you had to spend the rest of your life staring at the world’s ugliest tattoo, you’d probably want to throw yourselves off a balcony once in a while too, wouldn’t you? Huh?

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But Spector (enter dark looming clouds) didn’t like bagels with cream cheese, small personal-size boxes of raisin bran or apples with tiny, brown, centimeter-deep puncture wounds on them. No, the continental breakfast definitely would not do. So maybe he ordered room service every single day instead.

Well whatever he did it looks like he was paying for extra of something – the hotel is currently suing him for $110,000 they claim he owes them. Will the hotel ever see this money? Probably not – but Spector’d no doubt be happy to throw in some unneeded “Wall of Sound” if that would help at all.

You know, the kind he used to toss around so freely circa 1970.

Phil Spector spent an awfully long time at trial over the murder/death of 40 year old Lana Clarkson, the woman that was found dead at his house. All arguements one way or the other temporarily ended when the jury deadlocked and a mistrial was declared.

Mistrial or no mistrial though – Spector had been renting several rooms at the Westin Bonaventure for he and his legal team. From what we’ve seen he kept up on payments the first four months, but then he began to let things slide – which probably really upset the bellhop who was standing there with his hand out.

According to the LA Times, the hotel claims:

“Spector stopped paying the bills for rooms four months into his stay at the Westin Bonaventure, a few blocks from the Criminal Justice Center where his trial was held, according to a lawsuit filed Wednesday in Los Angeles County Superior Court.

“Spector had an agreement to pay in advance every two weeks, according to the suit. The Westin provided Spector with special accommodations, including “heavenly beds,” complimentary workouts for his attorneys and a secured “litigation war room” guarded with key-card access, said Shari L. Rosenthal, an attorney for the Westin.”

The trial started April 24, 2006 and ended September 26, 2007. If he only paid the first four months ‘rent’ that means he was there for over a year without paying a dime. Perhaps the hotel’s reluctant permittance had something to do with all those unresolved murder allegations.

Still, we don’t know about you, but with rates like that we’re booking a room. Actually, make that two rooms, preferably adjoining, and have somebody roll breakfast in on a cart every morning around 9:30.

Please no gross looking apples.

To read more see ‘Hotel sues Phil Spector over $100,000 unpaid bills’ On The Associated Press Website