Hollywood is stupid and filled with stupid people. Basically, actors strive to hone their art all their lives to deliver realistic and devastating portrayals of real people… real people they’ve not had to deal with for many years… and shed their personality to morph into someone else.
And for what? Well, aside from the millions they get paid, it seems to be all in the name of getting your name written on the floor. How magical!
The latest thesp to get their name situated in a place where dogs can shit on it is Gwyneth Paltrow who now has her name on a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Read More >>>
When Hecklerspray finally leaves this mortal realm it’ll probably be in a hail of gunfire as we bravely rescue babies from poor people who can’t afford them anyway.
Strange they could afford all those bullets though.
Still, don’t call us heroes. It’s not anything you wouldn’t do if put in the same situation. Unless of course you wouldn’t – in which case we’d be totally fine with the ‘hero’ tag. In fact, you can even build us a monument.
Get us one better than George Harrison‘s though, won’t you? We couldn’t bear to see our sweet memory trampled so callously under-foot.
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In one thousand years nobody will even know we were here.
This depresses us greatly, and fuels our determination to freeze ourselves so that when the time comes, we can tell people exactly who we were. Before we can do that, though, we have to find a place to put our ice cube trays and figure out how to shut the upper compartment freezer-door with us inside it.
Not everyone has to worry about such things though – 25 new superstars have just been listed as the ones about to get their names on a Hollywood Walk of Fame slot. At least one of them is a cartoon. How does that make you feel? In 1000 years you will be nothing but dust blowing through the stratosphere, and Tinkerbell will still be a fairly regular topic of California-conversation.
Oh, this is gonna be a hard day.
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