Hillary Clinton - HecklerSpray

How I’m Handling 2016 (in GIFS): Part 2

December 27th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

A couple of months back I did a blog on how I’d been handling 2016 via GIFs. At the time, I dealt with my feelings about everything from Beyoncé’s Lemonade to Brangelina’s split, the shit show election to Kimye outing Taylor Swift as shady, Brexit to the constant drivel that comes out of Lena Dunham’s mouth.

I really thought that, with a mere two and a half months left to the year, nothing could get much worse (or better). I thought maybe pop culture had blown my mind enough for one year. But nope, Trump got elected and for some reason we still let Lena Dunham speak publically. Here’s how I’ve been handling 2016’s bullshit since October 8th, when I last aired my feelings. Once again, presented in GIFs…

So Donald Trump is the New American President…

November 11th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Yes, I know this news is a few days old but 1) I’ve been working and mega sick, and 2) I didn’t want to write a first reaction blog about this topic. I wanted to wait until I’d really wrapped my head around the situation so I didn’t come on here and sound like a disgruntled liberal, which I’m sure I often sound like anyway.

I won’t lie, on Tuesday night I had to take an Ativan and go to bed early because I could not fucking handle watching the election results. When I woke up Wednesday morning and read that Trump had won I legit cried, and I cried twice more during the day like the big fucking baby I am.

Some Last Minute Thoughts on the Election

November 5th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

So the American presidential election is this coming Tuesday and I have obviously written a fair bit about it, given that this presidential race has literally been one of the biggest shit shows in American history. It is literally like watching an episode of Rob and Chyna. That’s right: this race has been so shitty and unbearable to watch it’s not even an episode of Keeping Up With the Kardashians.

While I’m Canadian, this is an American based site and I feel like the majority of you who read this are American, so this upcoming week is really huge for you. So, before you make any decision about voting, I’d like to throw some last minute ideas at you.

Best Celebrity Halloween Costumes 2016

November 5th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Well, my favourite day of the whole year, Halloween, has come and gone, which means I am officially prepared to go into full blown holly jolly Buddy the Christmas elf Christmas mode. Seriously, I watched Christmas with the Kranks yesterday. I like to watch that movie early because it’s not like a top 10 Christmas movie so I don’t need to save it until December, but I still really enjoy it, but anyway.

However, before I go all holiday cheer on your asses, I’d like to look back at this Halloween to examine some of the best celeb costumes. I’m always so jealous of celebrity Halloween costumes because they have so much fucking money that their costumes can RULE. Here are some that ruled HARD.

How I’m Handling 2016 (In GIFS)

October 8th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

In case you haven’t noticed, 2016 has been an absolute global shit show. I mean, it has been an emotional fucking rollercoaster across the board for the entire world and I think it’s safe to say we’re all ready to get this shit over with.

Even though it’s only October, I really wanted to reflect on how I’ve been handling this year, both in terms of celebrity and pop culture shit, as well as serious global issues, in the best way I know possible: GIFS.

Shocker: Trump is a Gross, Perverted Pig

October 8th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

Listen, I’m going to be honest with you: I am so over this Trump shit and all the other world garbage 2016 keeps throwing at us, I just don’t really even know how to report on this anymore. But here we are, once again talking about how a man running for president of the United States is an absolute piece of garbage.

We all already knew Trump was a sexiest, misogynistic piece of shit, but this week it was taken to a whole new level when footage leaked from him legitimately talking about assaulting women with Billy Bush.

Courtney Stodden Might Save Bernie Sanders

March 16th, 2016 By Krysta Fitzpatrick

At this moment, I cannot thank the internet Gods enough for #blessing me today with this beautiful news. In case you don’t follow American politics too closely, here’s a quick recap of what’s going on in the Democratic party: everybody’s pal Bernie Saunders and Republican in Democrat’s clothing Hillary Clinton (just kidding, I like her) are both vying to be the Democratic nominee for President of the United States. Thus far, it seems like Hilary is more than likely going to take it.

That is, until the world got privy to Courtney Stodden’s Instagram post promoting Bernie (and by the world, I mean me. And by “got privy” I mean finally added her on Instagram. I know you’re all shocked that I wasn’t obsessively following her already. Believe me, I feel like a failure). ANYWAY, two days ago Courtney posted a video showing some love for good old Bern, and let me tell you, it’s fantastic.

Brooke Hogan Tries to Think Again: Fails.

March 24th, 2009 By Ian Dransfield

Being a member of the Hogan family would be great, if it weren’t for the fact that right now it would be rubbish.

The bright orange dad made of leather, Hulk Hogan, is in some trouble for trying to hide money from his mad wife, Linda Hogan, who’s going out with someone about three decades younger than herself, while the son, Nick Hogan, sits in jail for nearly killing his best mate and the daughter, Brooke Hogan… well – she just continues to embarrass herself.

Today it’s through the wonderful means of slagging off Paris Hilton via MySpace. What an age we live in! Though we can’t help but find it annoying – we slag that bint off more or less every day, and we have a go at the Hogans and we still don’t get national news exposure.

It’s a bloody popularity contest.

US Election Betting Odds: Scandal Edition – Shop Lifting

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Now that Eurovision has come and gone and depressed all British people, it’s time to look for something else to bet on. Sadly, nothing’s quite as important as Eurovision, so we’ve settled on the next best thing.

That’s right, the US presidential elections. But we’re not going to bother ourselves with any of this ‘Who’ll win?’ malarkey – instead we’re focusing on what the next scandal to hit the candidates will be. None are likely to be as funny as Barack Obama‘s kooky reverend, but if they happen and get confirmed by either Bloomberg, CNN or Fox, you’ll win. Profiting from other people’s misery – what could possibly be sweeter?

Here are the US election betting odds for a shop lifting scandal, with help from Paddy Power…

Elton John: “Hey America, Vote For Hillary Clinton Or Go To Hell!”

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

The great thing about the US general election is that everyone has an opinion – it doesn’t matter how fat, bald, gay, shortsighted, badly-dressed, gap-toothed or non-American they are.

Elton John is all of these things, so his say is much louder than someone who is only one or two of those things. And Elton John, he say “Hillary Clinton.”

Elton John has played his New York fundraiser concert for Hillary Clinton, and raised about $2.5 million for her campaign in the process. And then he opened his mouth and said that everyone who didn’t vote for Hillary Clinton can go to hell. Which, yes, technically does include Elton John, but he was already going to hell anyway so it doesn’t matter. You can’t write a song like I Am Your Robot and expect to get away with it.