Helio Castroneves, yesterday’s spangly winner on TV’s Dancing With The Stars, is today’s unlucky loser in love, following the news that he has been poleaxed by erstwhile fiancée Aliette Vazquez.

The engagement was called off within a day of Castroneves’ dancefest glory. He was dumped after six years by Vazquez, who kept schtum so as not to affect the outcome of the reality show. They were engaged for about a year.

Poor old Mel B. She's always the bridesmaid, never the bride, and that has to sting - especially when the bride is a South American bloke who drives cars for a living.

Actually that's not strictly true - with her relationship history, Mel B has been the bride quite a lot actually - but as far as Dancing With The Stars goes, Mel B is definitely the bridesmaid. Last night saw the final of this year's Dancing With The Stars, and long-time favourite Mel B was just pipped to the post by Brazilian racing driver Helio Castroneves. And if Helio Castroneves is the bride of Dancing With The Stars and Mel B is the bridesmaid, that makes third-place Marie Osmond a Dancing With The Stars usher or something. Or a flower girl. Or the woman who plays the church organ in an amusingly bad way. Look, we don't know, OK?